Chapter 53 Raphael's wife

(Lena's POV)
At dinner time, Jamie insisted on sitting beside me. Although the dinner was very generous, because of my wounds, I could not eat too much greasy stuff yet.
Rafael even thoughtfully asked them to set out what I could eat in front of me. I was grateful for his kindness.
It was not a very painful meal.
But, I didn't say anything either.
Once dinner was over, Rafael revealed his nasty nature once again.
Because Jamie had to sleep with me, to calm Jamie down, Rafael knocked on my door at midnight in the middle of the night.
I was in my pajamas, frowning at the two men outside the door.
"Jamie, you're not allowed to yell at night."
Jamie nodded, but I doubt he even listened to what I was saying.
Jamie held out his hand and was about to ask me for a hug.
I glanced at Raphael, but, Raphael did not react.
I just couldn't refuse Jamie's request, plus the boy himself had some problems, and eventually, I reached out and took him into my arms. However, when I intended to go inside, Jamie unexpectedly cried again.
I looked at Jamie with a puzzled look on my face, "What's wrong, Jamie? Are you hungry?"
Jamie held out his hand and pointed at Rafael.
I understood what Jamie meant in an instant. He wanted us to sleep with him.
Such a thing, if it was before, I'm sure it's hard to accept, but Jamie cried hard.
"Come on in."
I compromised, but Rafael didn't seem to hear me. It wasn't until I looked back at him again that he responded and quickly walked into my room.
We were just lying in bed together, with Jamie between us. It didn't matter that Rafael and I were both in our pajamas, we were just trying to get Jamie a good night's sleep.
I comforted myself but found myself unable to sleep.
By this time, Jamie had fallen asleep.
I turned to look at Raphael and found that Raphael had also closed his eyes.
Raphael's sleeping face looks quiet, his eyelashes are long, and at such a distance, it's hard for me to miss how handsome he is.
It seems that I am indeed the only one who cannot accept such a thing.
Because it was too boring, I could only pass the boring time by observing them.
My eyes started at the strands of Raphael's hair, went to his well-defined jawline, and finally, my eyes gradually moved to his neck and then rested on his chest - there was no way to see underneath because he was covered with a quilt.
Once again, I thought of what Miller and I had said earlier, that Rafael never wanted to get married again, even though Jamie needed a mother as much as he needed a wife.
However, he never had such an idea.
I even secretly asked Miller the question, didn't anyone come after Rafael?
But Miller laughed.
She told me that no one wants to try something like this unless they feel too lucky in life.
This sentence sounds slightly scary to me. However, I do not intend to explore these things too much.
I forced myself not to have you interested in Raphael.
I sighed and was going to keep my eyes open until the next day.
"What are you looking at?"
I got a shock and a shiver, then I looked up at Raphael, who looked awake, not at all like he was asleep.
"I thought you were asleep."
Sure, I know it's a bad thing to peek at people, but Raphael was pretending to sleep too, and we were even.
"Nothing, I'm going to sleep."
"You're going to want to see it, you can be generous, Lena, we've done this a long time ago."
I rolled over and pretended not to hear what he said, still secretly cursing him for being a pervert, but my ears were already burning and my cheeks were turning red.
Raphael gave a low laugh, and I suspected I heard it wrong because the sound was a little low. Then Raphael did not continue to speak.
I don't know when I fell asleep. When I opened my eyes again, it was almost noon the next day.
This went on for several days, and because of Jamie, we both slept together all the time, and gradually, I got used to this.
I often saw Miller, but, rarely saw another servant.
This servant's name was Martha, and according to my intuition, I didn't like her very much, and of course, she shouldn't like me very much either.
Miller's work has been more because of the arrival, she no longer has to watch Jamie all the time.
Because Jamie has been following me around.
Miller went out to make purchases, and with great effort, I finally put Jamie to sleep and came into the living room.
I just wanted to take a break. Raphael's house is so big that I don't even have to leave this house.
Martha happened to be cleaning in the living room. She took one look at me, didn't greet me, and then, went around my side.
I was going to ignore her. I stood in front of the floor-to-ceiling window with my cup of tea, looking out at the courtyard. It's autumn now, and the leaves are starting to fall off the trees, and the withered leaves are spreading all over the courtyard.
"Can you move over?"
I turned my head to look at Martha, not offended by her offensive tone. Then, I changed to another position and continued to look out at the view.
Still, I smiled and said, "You clean up so fast."
Martha suddenly froze, she stood up and then turned to look at me.
To be honest, I didn't understand how she could have such an expression on her face, as if she had been greatly humiliated.
I pretended I didn't see it. I didn't care what Martha thought of me.
"You are such a vile woman."
The tone of Martha's voice is very much like that of a poor heroine in a fairy tale after being bullied by her wicked master.
I raised my eyebrows and looked at Martha with a puzzled expression.
"Can you give me a reason for saying that?"
Martha dropped the rag from her hand, then, she wiped her wet hands on her apron. She raised her chin and looked at me with contempt, "I say, you are a vile woman, Miss Lena. It needs no reason, for I have seen through you long ago."
I suddenly had the urge to laugh out loud, but I think Martha might have exaggerated even more if I had done so.
I held back my laughter and looked at her and said, "Honestly, Martha, I don't understand what has caused you to misunderstand me so deeply."
Martha gave a cold laugh, "It's simple, Miss Lena, and I think you understand it yourself."
I drank all the tea in my cup and then looked at her, my gaze was calm: "If you must waste time with me like this, you can wait until after all your work is done, after all, if you don't manage to finish these, it won't have any effect on me, and it will be you who will be unlucky."
I did remind her in good faith, and of course, I admit, there was some warning in there as well.
However, Martha didn't appreciate me.
"Only I see through your dirty soul, Miss Lena, and I think it's all a conspiracy on your part."
If I was still drinking water right now then I would have just spewed it out.
I looked at Martha with a surprised look on my face, and what's even scarier is that she felt like she was saying it without any problems at all.
I ignored Martha, who thought I was feeling scared because she had figured me out. I didn't know what to say.
"Miss Lena, I'm afraid you don't have memory loss at all, do you? You only did that to make Mr. Raphael feel guilty about you so you could keep hogging Mr. Raphael's love, didn't you?"
I opened my mouth, but Martha looked very excited.
She looked pained, as if in a bit of despair that there was no way to free Raphael.
My God, how would Rafael react if he knew what Martha was thinking? Still, I didn't interrupt her.
I would be curious about this.
But Martha wasn't about to let me off the hook like that: "Miss Lena, if you love Mr. Raphael, you shouldn't have done this, you've left, haven't you?"
I now probably understand what Martha meant.
"Miss Lena, leave, forever, since you don't love Mr. Raphael at all, don't do such things that would make people feel homo sapiens all around!"
If these words had not been spoken to me, I might have been moved by what Martha said.
It seems that Rafael is no longer without a suitor.
I gave a soft laugh and then walked towards Martha: "Martha, I think there is one thing you have to get clear, I didn't ask to come back on my own, Rafael invited me on his initiative, do you understand?"
Martha's eyes widened.
I didn't stop just because she showed such an expression, I continued, "And, Martha, you have to understand that whether I love Raphael or not, and whether Raphael loves me or not, none of this matters, because I am his wife and I am supposed to be the owner of this place."
I was surprised that I didn't feel resistance when I said those words.
It was as if I had begun to think of this place as my home, and even though I kept reminding myself that one day I would have to leave, I still saw Raphael as my husband and Jamie as my child.
Of course, I still had the smile on my face that I should have.
Martha was trembling, she was about to say something but suddenly closed her mouth. Then she bent down and lifted the bucket and left the living room.
I looked at her back, and before I could get over the joy of winning, I suddenly heard a playful voice from behind me, "You do own this place."
I turned around with wide eyes and Rafael was standing in the doorway, looking at me with eager eyes.