Chapter 17. Tracing the Past

**(Daniel’s perspective)**

For a few days, Daniel had been thinking a lot about the woman who looked exactly like his beloved Carmelia. He couldn’t just dismiss his restless feeling about her whereabouts. He needed to know. He craved to understand what was going on in the air.
If that woman was really Carmelia, she would have a lot to explain to him after all this time. It didn’t make sense for her to just disappear after the incident. Although the incident that happened to her was also part of his fault, he still wanted to know why she abandoned him.
Every night, he would dream about his mistake in the past. If it was because of the absence of his caring manner toward her, he would want to make it up for her.
It pained him that he had to be away from her presence. He just wanted her to be by his side. But what really happened? Why she pretended to not know him? Was it because she wanted to start a new life with that geeky man named Jonathan Brown?
Hamuza told him not to be reckless once again. Daniel had to be keen on seeing the situation around him. People were watching his move out there. He couldn’t risk his privacy to be exposed in the media. He should keep it low profile. No one could know the case of his wife’s disappearance but his own people.
Daniel never stopped contemplating everything about her. His mind was so occupied while sitting down against the glass window in his office room.
For a moment, he reminisced the day he met her for the second time in the local library. And since that day, he would like to deliver her something that could send an implicit message to her. Something that probably might remind her, if she was really Carmelia.
*The sweet waffles.*
He still remembered what food his wife liked the most. Carmelia always craved for delicious waffles. She always asked him to eat waffles together every time. And he never refused. He was rather glad that she shared her happiness with him.
And he also remembered what fragrance she always used. What clothes she would wear. She was just basically the embodiment of the true golden glamour in his eyes.
But there was a distinct difference when he saw Sienna Moss again in the local library. She kind of appeared in an old-fashioned way just like her new geeky boyfriend. Or was it because Jonathan intentionally giving her the influence?
But if she was really one person, he would be so angry. He probably wouldn’t be able to control the explosion of his anger toward her. He missed her so much that it could make him crazy if she just abandoned him.
On the day of lunchtime with her, Daniel had to ask away. It was all just to make sure about the truth. If his gut of feeling had been wrong about her, then he would walk away from Sienna. He wouldn’t bother her relationship with Jonathan. And he was never intended to do that in the first place anyway. He already had a wife, but she was lost a long time ago.
“While we’re waiting for Mister Brown to come here, why don’t you tell me about yourself?” Daniel had to keep it low profile, so she wouldn’t be suspicious. “We haven’t actually got to know each other since our first meeting in that pub’s party.”
Sienna’s lips trembled to talk. He noticed that.
When his eyes lingered hypnotically on hers, Sienna snapped out, “Ugh, I thought I already told you that I work as a florist. And you know I’m also a part-time local librarian. That’s all.”
The only similarity that was left there; would be her vintage vibe. He could feel it strongly. His wife was just such a classic beauty. Carmelia fond of flowers. And Sienna was a florist. That couldn’t be just a mere coincidence.
Then he chuckled. “No, not about that.”
Sienna blinked nervously. “Then about what?”
“Something about you. Something interesting,” Daniel said as he took a bite of the pastry.
“About me… uh…” it took Sienna a few seconds before she could arrange the words for him to hear, “I don’t know what’s so interesting about me. I just feel like another ordinary girl, who is living in the city, having a double job, helping my family pays the bills.”
That part didn’t sound pretty much like Carmelia. His wife wouldn’t have to live a double job. He had given her lots of money for her to live another twenty years in the superficial world.
“Have you ever lived outside the country before?” Daniel had to be on the point this time. He always hated wasting time with a small talk. “Traveling? Go see the world out there?”
Sienna chuckled shyly when he asked that. “Well, no longer these days. But yeah, that was the story from a long time ago.”
Daniel slightly raised his eyebrows. He was impatient to find out if Sienna was the same person as his wife. “Oh, really? Have you gone to Canada before? Like having a boat trip to a goddess island for instance?”
Daniel intentionally gave her a bait to bring up the old wound. And he could see she was suddenly surprised. But still, however, he couldn’t just judge her like a childish person.
“Well, I’d like to be sure that I haven’t been anywhere but New York since I got sick,” Sienna finally decided to tell him. “But the truth, I had a college life in Canada. I was only eighteen. It was around the time my dad had the money to enroll me to the university.”
For a second, she paused and stared down at her plate that filled with half of the pastry she had not finished eaten yet. And her hands shuddered.
Daniel noticed the frustration that was engraved on her face at the time. She was quiet.
“Miss Moss?” Daniel whispered. He looked concerned for her.
Sienna closed her pink lips tightly before she could talk it out to him, “At the time, my mom died from a brain tumor.”
Daniel paused his breath for a second, surprised. He once heard Carmelia also talked about the same thing. Her mom died from a brain tumor. Did these women have the same fate?
She muttered, “It was just the most terrible times of my life. I’d wish I didn’t remember.”
Daniel gave her a sympathizing stare. He could feel her sadness.
“I’m sorry for your loss, Miss Moss. My deepest condolence. It must be the hardest times,” he murmured carefully. He didn’t mean to break her heart by bringing up the topic. He had to walk on the eggshell for her.
“It’s okay. It was a long time ago anyway. I’m twenty-eight years old now…”
The more she revealed herself, the more Daniel was assured she was Carmelia. And the last time he heard; that terrible incident made her amnesia. If it was the truth, the woman who was sitting in front of him this time wouldn’t be able to remember who he was.
She tried to hide her pain behind her sweet smile when talking, “I just can’t look back and stuck in the past anymore. Life is about moving on to a better place.”
Daniel slightly licked his lips. Then he nodded at her. “Yeah, that’s life, Miss Moss.”
Sienna chuckled and said, “The future awaits.”
He chuckled along with her.
But then she said loosely, “Just don’t hold back to the past when you can. It’s just better off like that, I think.”
What was the odd? Why would this woman say that to him?
What did it mean when she said; *don’t hold back to the past? Did she deliberately want to forget the past where she had all the good memories with him?*
Daniel instantly stopped chuckling. Somehow, her words meant something more than she said. He would want to read it between the lines, and carefully.
He was so tensed after she said those damn painful words. It was like her words spoke to him directly, giving him the signal to move on and to forget Carmelia.
He stole a glance at his wristwatch. The lunchtime was almost over. He would have to attend a business meeting with the investors in his company.
At the time, Jonathan had just arrived. He came very late because of the bad traffic jam.
However, Daniel couldn’t concentrate fully when his mind was occupied with everything that Sienna had just told him. He wouldn’t be able to see the investors talk about business planning. He would need his own privacy to calm his mind.
Soon after, he said his farewell to them and just walked away. He noticed when Sienna and Jonathan gave him a bewildering look. But he couldn’t explain the truth to them yet. It was just something personal he had to deal with himself.
While entering the empty lift, Hamuza already followed behind him.
Once the lift’s door closed, Daniel glanced at him to say, “Find out anything you can about Sienna Moss. Trace down her history, especially what she’s been doing for the past ten years.”
Hamuza nodded obediently at him and said, “I will let you know as soon as possible, Sir.”
***
Around ten at night, Daniel went home after the hectic office hours finally ended.
He had met the investors and talked with them well about the planning and all. The company was in a good progress in his hand. His dad knew he was the right person to manage the Wilson Enterprises.
When he was about to lay down on his king-sized bed, Hamuza knocked at the door.
“Excuse me, Mister Wilson…” he said politely while peeping at him through the gap of the bedroom’s door.
Daniel immediately glanced at him lazily. He was already tired. His body felt numb.
But then Hamuza made his eyes wide awake after he said, “I have the news for you. It’s about Miss Sienna Moss.”
“Come in, Hamuza,” Daniel allowed him to step a foot inside of his minimalist bedroom. “What did you find?”
“Yes, Sir, I have found some facts about Miss Sienna Moss. And I’m sure you want to take heed…” he spoke carefully. “After her dad went broke ten years ago, she has been a local florist in Manhattan and also a part-time local librarian.”
That part, Daniel already knew. However, he kept listening heedfully.
“She has been in a close relationship with Jonathan Brown for the past two years. They are planning to have an engagement soon. But…” Hamuza looked at him carefully for a second.
“Go on, let me hear the rest,” Daniel demanded him.
“She didn’t finish her college. She was in a severe accident nine years ago that made her went into a coma. She woke up, amnesia for some years. And got married in nineteen…”
When Hamuza said the last words, Daniel quickly bulged his eyes out.
Hamuza spoke in a good demeanor, keeping his tone well-balanced. But the information he would share with him was like a great explosion.
“However, she decided to change her identity as Carmelia Rosewood when she got married to you, Mister Wilson. It is still unknown to me why she has to change her name...”
Daniel’s lips trembled. He was in great shock to hear it all.
It turned out; Sienna was his wife who had been gone missing almost ten years ago. His hunch was right on the point. He knew it from the moment he met her again.
“I know that Carmelia was sick after the incident in a boat trip with me. She experienced amnesia, but…” his body shivered from the negative thought that haunted him. “Have she regained her memories now?”
Daniel already knew when Hamuza took a deep breath like that. He knew the answer to that question almost immediately.
Hamuza didn’t want to hurt Daniel with the reality, but this was the bitter truth, “I’m afraid to tell you, Mister Wilson, but yes, she has.”
Daniel clenched his jaw tightly. He got angrier every time he heard more about the truth.
Hamuza continued telling him, “Miss Sienna has regained her memories five years ago. I’ve checked her medical record.”
Daniel’s heart raced ragingly. He was still in denial with his own feeling. He still loved her so much. But he couldn’t believe that his wife would abandon him heartlessly.
It had been five years since her memories had returned. He wondered why Sienna had to lie about her identity?
The echo of her words crossed his mind again.
*Just don’t hold back to the past when you can.*
*It’s just better off like that, I think.*
*The future awaits.*
Right at that moment, his rage was about to explode.