Chapter 109: Julian's Confession

“You what?” my mother’s tone went from comforting to straight-up confusion.

*NO!!* I was frozen in place. *What am I supposed to do now?!* As if being pregnant wasn’t enough, now I gotta make up my mind on whether or not I barge in and make it even more obvious or just play dumb. Or better yet; play dead.

I heard my mother’s voice before Julian’s. “I mean, of course you. What’s wrong with that? I love her too.”

“No, I mean…”

It was now or never. Julian’s moment of doubt gave me the split-second chance I needed to make up my mind. I gave his door a few brisk bangs. “Mom? Are you in there?”

My sudden interruption got an expectedly startled reaction out of my mother. “Oh! You startled me. Yes, Suki?”

“I need to talk to you. It’s important. Do you have a minute?”

There was a moment of silence in Julian’s room until I heard footsteps getting closer. My anxiety about their conversation washed away as soon as I heard them stop talking to each other.

*Wait–they aren’t whispering, are they??*

My eagerness to end this situation didn’t end when the door was opened. “Mom–” my tongue froze in place when the person standing in front of me was the one who had made my life a living hell.

“I’m sorry I had to steal Isabella for a moment.” as genuinely sincere as he was, I still couldn’t resist shooting him a hostile glare.

“Cool. I want her back now.”

*Your fucking ass GOT ME PREGNANT!*

As much as I wanted to scream that in his face and give him a sucker punch in the torso again, I reframed to the best of my ability with stiffening arms. Relief eases my nauseous stress when my mom steps past Julian. “Goodness, child! I’m here, I’m here.” she gave a startled gasp when I grabbed her by the hand and dragged her off but was still careful not to hurt her fragile body.

I stubbornly didn’t look back at Julian but I still saw his confused expression in the corner of my eye. It left another thought crossing my mind. *Do I tell him? …No, I don’t even want to think about doing anything like that. I’m not ready to decide that. Besides… if he knew, he’d make sure I’m shackled to his ankles forever. Like a fucking dog.*

Mom worriedly said my name as I dragged her throughout the palace and outside in the backyard. I wanted to stay as quiet as possible so that nobody else in the household could hear us. Once we were alone outside, I finally released her hand. “Sorry, Mom. I just needed privacy.”

My mother looked me up and down with steel in her pretty green eyes as if she were preparing herself for what was to come. Let’s just say this wasn’t the first time I’ve dragged her off to tell her something important in private, usually when I’m in deeper shit than I can handle.

“Alright. What did you do this time?”

Her sharp bluntness made me wince an eye close as if she had just pinched me. Damn, Mom, not even gonna have a little faith in me? Not like there was any point in speaking that thought out loud. I’ve never fucked up this big before.

*I should’ve rejected Julian from the very beginning.*

“Mom, I…” I had already planned on confiding to her for help and was determined to get her out here but now that we’re in this moment, I was getting cold feet. Shit…

When my mom noticed I was uncomfortable, she stepped forward and gently grasped my hand with a tender smile. “It’s alright, honey, I’m listening.”

Every time she looked at me like that it made me feel like a child again, lost and not knowing what to do. It at least gave me the nerve to speak about the biggest problem I’ve ever had. “I’m pregnant.”

Mom’s jaw dropped, and she reminded me of a buffing laptop with a blue screen, trying not to overload and fry its wires. “You, wait, what?!” it was obvious where I inherited my stuttering when I’m worked up. “Since when? With when?? I mean who–you, wait. What?! Sukia Arlee!”

I quickly tried to curve the topic off of who the father is. I was distraught enough as is just admitting this to my mother, telling her that Julian is the father wasn’t an option. “I don’t know what to do. What am I supposed to do? I don’t want to be a mom! I… *me*, of all people, I just can’t do it.”

My mother’s brain practically had a seizure until finally calmed down when she saw that I truly looked lost and unsure of where to go from here. I always had my own road I wanted to take because I refused to let anybody else choose my road for me. But this was different. “Oh, honey…” she stepped forward and hugged me tightly as if she were trying to squeeze all the fret and turmoil out of me. “It’ll be ok. Let’s not think about the baby.”

The panic that was engulfing me came to a stop along with every other functioning part of my brain. “What…? But the baby–”

“Isn’t important right now. It’ll be important 9 months from now. What’s important right now is you.” she leaned away from me and placed her hands on my shoulder like she does when she’s trying to cheer me up or cheer me on. “Your body isn’t going to be what it used to be, so you’ll have to take extra care of yourself. Luckily for you, your mother is an awesome cook with healthy food. Oh yeah! That also means no more smoking and drinking.”

She gave me a wink, as it was my turn for my jaw to drop. “Wait–what?! Bull! I can’t just–”

“Oh yeah, no more coffee, too.”

“You can't be serious!”

“Unless it’s decaffed.” she chimed rather proudly. I heaved a sigh and hung my head. I didn’t expect this conversation to turn into something that will annoy the fuck outta me, but… it could’ve been worse. I knew it was wisest to come to my mother out of all people. She made it feel like everything would be alright.

All I need to do is focus on myself right now then, right? *Yeah… I can do that.* Now that I thought about it, it was the baby that bothered me the most, not being pregnant. Then again… walking around the mansion with a stomach that looks like I swallowed a whole pumpkin will surely gain plenty of reactions. I just hoped that Mom would still acknowledge the hint that I didn’t want to talk about who the father was.

I felt eyes on the back of my head and instinctively looked back toward the mansion without thinking. The hair on the back of my neck stood up when I saw Julian watching us from one window on the second floor. What was worse was that was my bedroom window.