Chapter 15: Tasting Sweet Freedom

After the little confrontation Grace wanted to have with me, I paced around in the rose garden while on the brand-new iPhone that Julian bought for me. After that night we had a little too much free time together, It felt wrong using this thing but I had already thrown away my old phone that probably would’ve been tracked sooner or later since it was another stolen phone from one of my idiotic victims. Thankfully, I took all the numbers from my friends out of the stolen phone and into the phone that Julian gifted me before I threw the old thing away. Currently, I’m texting one of my friends from the gang, Jack.

“Damn SuSu it sounds like you’ve got your hands full! u must be having a blast” He texted me, his words full of humor like his voice when he talked to me in person.

“Yeah… More like a blast up my ass. Gabriel is alright… I guess. He’s suffocating but I can tell he really cares about Mom so… I don’t know. I don’t feel comfortable leaving her here just yet. Not with those fucking twins runnin’ ‘round…”

“Ha ha Alex says u should’ve stabbed that bitch in the gut”

I can’t help but humorously smirk to myself as I continue to text the man. “Oh I was about to”

“How bout u come visit us today? We miss u”

My lips parted with hesitation. The thought of leaving my mother here on her own didn’t sit right with me. But, I’ll eventually have to put my trust in Gabriel sooner or later. He hasn’t disappointed or pissed me off yet. He’s a bit of an idiot but I know my mom makes up for that. I let out a quiet sigh before texting him back. “Sure. Come get me”

“Omw!”

After Jack’s last message, I ran my hand through my curly hair while locking my phone.

A lil getaway won’t hurt anyone, right? I better tell Mom that I’m heading out first. I don’t want her to get worried.

I could’ve simply just text my mom but this gave me a good reason to see her. It was embarrassing to hover over her so instead, I liked to find good reasons for an opportunity.

The walk from the rose garden to the mansion wasn’t a complete exercise but finding my mother within the maze of the mansion was a different conversation altogether. I did have a feeling that she would be in one place that was predictable for me.

The Library.

I head up the white staircase and into the room that is ten times the size of my bedroom. Rows of bookcases lined both the walls and the middle of the room like dividers.

There, I see my mother sitting in one of the cushiony chairs with her face in a book, a little smile on her pink lips, and her green eyes engrossed behind her reading glasses. She sat next to a window that allowed all of the sun’s rays to shine down on her like a golden spotlight. And, as always, her bright ginger hair gleamed like fire. It even made her ginger eyelashes more vibrant. My mother was truly beautiful, inside and out, and I admired her for it. Seeing her so enchanted with the book she was reading brought an amused grin to my face.

Mom’s head lifted as soon as she noticed me and the freckles on her cheeks briefly danced as her lips stretched into a bright smile. “Suki! Come, come here.” She beacons me over with several waves of her hand. As usual, I stuff my hands in my pockets as I stroll over then lean down to peek inside the book right as she points to a picture. It was a pale pink flower with many, thick petals.

“It’s called an English rose! Isn’t it beautiful?” My mother had an enchanted twinkle in her eyes as she looked from the rose up to me expectedly, eager for my opinion.

“You call that a rose? It looks like crinkled paper…” I mumble, making my mother’s excited look turn into an expression of frustration as her cheeks faintly puffed and she whacked me on the back of my head.

“Oh, stop that. Why do you always have to be so rude?” She lectured me then looked at the frilled rose and her smile returned. “I think it’s gorgeous. Someday, we should go to the flower shop and buy some. We’ll plant them in the rose garden, I’m sure Gabriel wouldn’t mind. What do you think?” She asked while looking up at me again.

I couldn’t keep a smile from forming on my lips as I watched her. “Sure, Mom.”

“Good. I would’ve dragged you along with me anyways.” She gave me a sneaky smile and I rolled my eyes.

That’s my mom alright.

“Hey, Mom, I just wanted to let you know that I’m headed to the west-side for a bit to go see my, uh… my friends. I’ll be back before midnight, ‘kay?” As I spoke, I saw her summer leaf-green eyes filled with concern as she looked up at me from behind her reading glasses.

“You’ll be back, won’t you…?” Her question made my chest sting to the point I winced as if I had just been stabbed.

Does she really think I’d run off like that…?? Well, yet again, I’ve done it before…

My lips pursed at that thought. The last time I ran off was when I was only a teenager and she had never seen nor heard from me since then. I abandoned her for years, all because I couldn’t stand seeing my vibrant, beautiful mother look so sad and dead inside every second of the day. Now that we’re reunited, I’m beginning to feel ashamed of myself.

I really am I selfish asshole…

Though I was successfully able to keep my negative thoughts to myself, I still frowned with annoyance when looking down at her. “Seriously? Damn, I know I’m a shitty person, but at least pretend you’ve got some faith in me.”

Once again, Mom whacked me on the back of the head. She’s done that a lot to me, even when I was a young child. Once again she had that lecturing look in her eyes. “You still don’t know when enough is enough, do you? Fine, enjoy your time with your friends. But please, please be safe. The west-side is—”

“The west-side is dangerous. Yeah. I know. You think I wouldn’t?” This time my voice is filled with irritation. As soon as my mom looked wounded and depressedly looked back into her book quietly, I immediately mentally kicked myself in the ass. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean…”

Before I could say anything else, my mother put her hand on top of mine. Our hands were the same size, the same shape, and even our fingers had the same length in width. The only difference was how naturally pale her skin was compared to my caramel tone. That, and I finally noticed that her hands had a few more wrinkles from what I remembered. She smiled kindly up at me. “It’s ok, honey. I love you.”

And there she goes again… always forgiving me, no matter how big I fuck something up…

Unable to find the words to say next, I leaned down and kissed the side of her head before whispering “I love you too” and walked my way out of the library. I felt my mom’s eyes on my back the whole time once I left. Suddenly, there was a loud honk outside and I quickly ran to the window, seeing Jack’s trashy car that looked decades old with rusted paint, cracked windows, and duct tape trying to keep the trunk closed.

I couldn’t help but bust out laughing at their shamelessness. “You stupid mother fuckers!” My curses towards them were always endearing as I ran down the stairs and outside, pushing past a couple of startled maids in the process.

As soon as I was outside, I spread my arms wide as if I was expecting a big hug as I walked towards the car. “Aaaye!”

“SuuuSuuuuu!” The three men called as they busted out of the rundown car and ran up to me like puppies who had missed their owner who had gone to work for a week.

I gave them a bro-hug each as they gave me rough pats on the back and I couldn’t help but laugh again at their goofiness.

Fuck, I missed these guys.

“Let’s get the fuck up on outta here,” I say while twirling my finger in the air. As we went back to Jack’s car, I could see some of the maids whispering to each other while giving us the stink eye and I smirked with humor at them. Because of the way the men were dressed in dirty clothes, baggy jeans, and leather jackets, it was obvious where they had come from. And I felt pride being one of them.

I got into the passenger seat by gripping a hold of the roof of the car and leaping through the window like a racecar driver. As soon as I was seated in the worn-down seat, Jack handed me a lit cigarette from my favorite brand and I gave him a fist bump in return. I felt touched that they had gone and bought me my favorite cigs just because they were excited to see me. As usual, my illegal self never buckled up. It didn’t matter anyway, the seatbelts were broken or twisted from abuse. Jack put his car in drive and floored it, making me laugh again as we jerked and the car basically farted smoke.

Without thinking about it, I glanced back at the mansion. My grin faded when I saw Julian staring at me through a window as we drove off. There was something about his expression that left me uneasy. I’d expect to see concern in his blue eyes but, instead, I saw something else.

Rage.