128 — JULIAN ADAMS (POV)

“I didn’t buy it,” I say firmly and notice that her eyes tear up.
“Then it was my father because they’re saying that O’J Tech bought it. You two found it together, so if it wasn’t you, it was him.” Angelee runs a hand through her hair, brushing it back. “Why would he do that?”
“Michael has had his eye on that company for some time. Your father saw the opportunity and took it.”
She lets her hands fall around her body and looks at me with frowning eyebrows. “I’m not a fool, Julian; I know the timing was too perfect to be a coincidence.”
I sigh, feeling my heart speed up even more... If things weren’t chaotic enough already, now I have a bomb in my hands about to explode.
“Don’t tell me that my father had a hand in that... scandal.” She crosses her arms, now looking upset. “Oh, crap... He did something, didn’t he?”
“Your dad didn’t break any laws.” I approach her slowly, touching her arms and rubbing them gently, feeling her skin chill from the breeze outside.
“Thousands of people have lost their jobs, Julian.” She says in a resentful voice. “Families who depended on this job... children to feed...”
“Look at me,” I ask, and she obeys, her sweet eyes resting on mine. And even now, with her slightly messy hair and sad expression, she’s still beautiful. “Those people aren’t your responsibility.”
“They are... if my father did it *because of me.”*
I try to caress her face. However, her eyes sharpen, and she asks me in a suspicious voice, pulling my hand away slowly, “Wait… how long did you know that? About my father’s plans to buy the company Eric worked for?”
“From the beginning. Mike consulted all the shareholders before making a decision… It’s a business talk, after all.”
“So Daddy really was behind the scandal? Is it really because of me?” Angelee asks me with tears in her eyes, and I’d like to say no... but I can’t.
Angelee knows, of course... Mike would never let someone who hurt his daughter get away with it. Taking away what a person is most proud of, what they love the most — he knows it’s the true punishment, the most painful payback... *Even if that means he needs to take over an entire company because of just one manager.*
She stays silent for a moment, then as if realization has fallen over her, she says in a thin voice, “Who took the video? Was it my father, too?”
I pause for a moment. I don’t want to lie, but I’m afraid of Angel’s reaction... Actually, I’m scared of everything. My heart hasn’t calmed down yet; it’s still pounding heavily, threatening to rise into my throat. Hah… Why does everything have to happen at once? It seems that all the world’s problems are attracted just when things are starting to be okay…
But she’s looking at me expectantly, fearfully... her eyes watery and tired, with dark circles appearing under them. Angelee looks pale and tired. She hasn’t been eating and sleeping properly and has been throwing up often... How could I not have noticed before?
I swallow hard, gritting my teeth, “No, I did it.”
She looks at me with tears in her eyes — a hurt look that destroys me inside. “How long have you had these videos?”
I sigh deeply, “Also from the beginning.”
She gives a weak, sad smile, and I hush to add, “I needed to protect you if I had to.”
“Why didn’t you just tell me?” She wipes the corner of her wet eyelashes. “You could have told me, but you sent it to Jackson, and now it’s all over the internet!”
“I wanted to let you sort it out yourself.” I try to touch her face, and fortunately, she doesn’t refuse my touch anymore. “I didn’t want to use it, but I had to... If Jackson didn’t see it for himself, they’d get away with it, you know that! I tried my best to stay out of it, but I love you... how could I stand by and watch the woman I love suffer?”
“I understand... I’m not mad, I’m just... That video, that day, those words... they’re a reminder of how I was stabbed in the back... how they lied to me for years, how they hid things and manipulated me… It’s like… a trigger, or something…”
“I didn’t think he’d publish it outside the forum. I’ll figure it out, okay? I’ve already had the videos taken down.” I sigh, pulling her into a hug. “Everything is under control; it didn’t go viral. I’m sure it was Jackson’s doing... no one else has that record.”
“But what if more people repost the video?” She asks with a shaky voice.
“Then I’ll hire a team of hackers to work all day and night just to delete one by one.” My words make her giggle, and that calms my chest, even though I’m deadly serious. “And I’ve already called Jackson to tell him that if this goes online again, the deal is off.”
She sniffles, silent for a moment, and says softly, fighting the smile that insists on staying on her lips, and it also makes me smile like a fool.
“Even so... I don’t think it would be enough to forgive you for that.”
“I can think of something else... maybe a romantic date?” She seems surprised by my suggestion but wilts and lowers her eyes... “Do you think you might be able to forgive me for that, babe?”
“It’s a start.” She gives a shy smile, then hugs me tightly, pressing her face against my chest. I stroke her messy hair, my fingers slowly stroking her head.
A long moment of silence falls between us, and I wish it were comfortable, but there’s a lump in my throat... a lump that’s been tightening there since earlier.
“I’m taking care of everything,” I say firmly, even though I’m really on the verge of a breakdown... It’s just that I have to be strong — I can’t show how shaken I am. Angelee may have said she’s not pregnant, but I’m sure she is. The signs have been in my face all this time, and I just didn’t see them.
Of course, I knew the consequences. I came inside her quite a few times, and our sex was always unprotected. Even though it had been her wish at the beginning not to use a condom, and I guessed she wasn’t on the pill, I got carried away... I didn’t think about it while fucking her, and we didn’t really talk about it, so I thought it would be fine if it happened... *it would be okay with me.*
But now she’s scared; I can see it in her eyes. And I’m also frightened, trying to respect her time, even though I’m about to freak out. But I can’t! I need to take responsibility for this! I need to take responsibility for her, for the company, for a pregnancy... Fuck. There are so many things on my mind right now... My head hurts so much like it’s going to explode.
“I’m not mad at you.” She finally says, cutting through this suffocating silence with her sweet voice. “I’m just upset that you left me out. I was pretty much in the dark about this, and I don’t like feeling like people are doing things behind my back. I’m afraid of having my faith in people shaken again, afraid that our trust will waver over something stupid just when I’m learning to talk. I’m scared of discovering lies and secrets and finding ugly things that I won’t like to learn.”
I understand, I really do. Angelee’s best friend and her boyfriend betrayed her. She lived in an abusive relationship for a long time, following what someone else said, annulling herself out to satisfy his desires. I understand so much that I held back as much as I could and let her avenge herself, even though I knew all of this would be over if I just snapped my fingers and fired Laura. But what good would that do? I wanted to give Angelee back the power over herself... I wanted her to see how capable she is... How talented she had always been.
This Director position, I took it temporarily because I knew that if I taught Angelee... if she trusted herself, she would do an excellent job, and no one would stop her or tell her what to do, what to wear, how to feel. Honestly, I’m really proud to see how much she’s grown.
I’m proud... but now frightened that I’ve fucked everything up.
“I don’t want to make problems between us... It’s just that seeing this news and thinking that lives have been shaken because of me has made me anxious. I never wanted to hurt or harm anyone.” She gives a nervous smile, “I know, I’m just overreacting.”
“Listen, you’re not overreacting. I shouldn’t have hidden any of this from you, and I won’t do it again — I won’t hide anything else.”
“You promise?” Her eyes sparkle, and just this pretty little face is enough to hit my weak spot.
“Yes, I promise, and I hope you’ll do the same... Can you do the same for me?”
She nods, with something on her mind, and falls back into a deep silence.
“If it can bring you some peace, the company is now part of J’O Tech; a scandal like that would arise sooner or later. Your father usually keeps old employees, so we saved them. But that’s something you should talk to your father.” I take a deep breath with a tight throat.
“There are a lot of things I need to talk to my father.” She says, with withered shoulders, lowering her face to hide her expression. “Actually, there are many things I need to do when morning comes... Can you wait a little longer?”
Her words make my heart speed up, suddenly uncomfortable. My eyes burn, and I kiss the top of her hair, trying to disguise it. “I can wait a lifetime.”
I pull away slowly, trying not to look directly at her as I add, “Now, why don’t you go back to bed? I’ll make you some tea to help you sleep.”
“Okay...” She says, walking backward, and I feel her eyes burning into my back, at my tense muscles. “You know, I love how easy things are with you... I was always jumping to conclusions because talking wasn’t really a thing before. But now, I know I can say what’s on my mind because you’ll find a way to make things right.”
I swallow hard this damn knot in my throat.
“You’re my strength, Julian... Don’t forget that, okay?”
“Um-hum,” I mumble, getting the kettle to boil the water, fighting back the tears as I struggle to add, “Go back to bed, babe... I’ll be right there.”
“Okay, I’m waiting for you.” Her footsteps drive away until I’m completely silent…
And I lean on the counter, both hands firmly on the marble, lowing my head, which hurts like hell, closing my eyes tightly and fighting these damn tears.
Damn it... I need to hold it.
If I collapse now... if I’m not strong... Angel won’t be able to take it either.
But fuck, I can’t do it anymore... I’ve held them for too long.
Tears just slide down my face, and my breath fails, with a sob finally escaping through my trembling lips. One by one, the tears come out, overwhelmed with emotions so intense that all I can do is try my best to do it silently and not let her hear me crying…
Because I know that *family* is the most complicated and scary thing in the world, our deepest wound... But if it’s with Angel, I can do it.