40 — A little problem

From the moment I saw that message, it's like everything around me passed by in slow motion. Julian came out of the shower, brought us breakfast… And we went back to the apartment. Each to his own.
I didn't have the courage to say anything about it, and Julian didn't seem bothered by the message on the screen either… It seemed so natural, so unimportant. And maybe it is… But why do I feel so sad? It's like my chest is tight.
I've been staring at the ceiling for hours. If I close my eyes, the scenes of our passionate night will return in my mind, and they have been disturbing me as much as Cathy's message. It was so good that it's dangerous. In fact, I have found that I have a taste for danger… for the adrenaline rush that Julian arouses in me.
But the price for that feeling is strong as a punch in the stomach.
I turn around, hugging my body, so cold without Julian's warmth.
The loneliness of this apartment is simply suffocating.
*Ring* — I hear a ringtone and get up abruptly, my heart beating so hard it feels like it's about to rip through my chest. But as I pick up and look at the screen, my body seems to sink into a deep, icy ocean because it's not a message from Julian…
**[Hey, it's Grace. Some friends are going to show me a super famous club in town tonight, would you like to go with us?]**
Really, a club? On a Sunday?
A deep sigh escapes my lips and I throw myself back on the bed, staring at the ceiling that will possibly blow holes if I keep staring at it.
Since everything that happened between Eric, Laura, and me, I have been feeling lonely. It's really sad to look back and realize that my life orbited these two people who stabbed me in the back without the slightest pity. The only reason I'm not worse is that Julian is with me. But I know I can't keep bothering him by taking up his nights and changing his routine so that I won't be alone.
*A club, huh…*
Closing my eyes tightly, I bring my hand up to cover them from a non-existent clarity. Maybe it's a vain attempt not to see the reality that's before me, but it's already too late to ignore it — I have already become too self-conscious.
I pick up my phone and type a quick reply,
**[Send me the time and address].**
***
I have heard of this club before… When it opened, Eric gave it intense criticism. According to them, women who go to this kind of place are looking for wild nights and there's no value in people like this. I never understood what he had against this place, and maybe that's why I never told him that my nineteenth birthday party, two months before I accepted his proposal, was exactly in a club.
Remembering that day still gives butterflies in my belly.
Butterflies that I tried to drown several times, but they never died.
I text Grace that I have arrived, but there's no answer for the past five minutes, so I decide to go inside and look for her. When I passed the security man, I noticed that he checked my body… his gaze pinching my skin isn't all unpleasant… it makes me feel powerful and hot… Exactly the reason I put on my new, tighter, low-cut dress.
Smiling at him, I entered the club. My eyesight immediately aches from the red light that dances across the room to the rhythm of the sensual beat of the music that makes me hold my breath… And I can't help but feel anxiety bubbling up my veins because *this doesn't look like a normal club.*
There are many couples kissing on the round couches… and women wearing costumes… (?)
I grab my phone quickly, typing with a tightness in the throat,
**[Grace… where are you? I can't see you anywhere.]**
Really, I'm probably at the wrong place. I can't believe that this is the actual address. I mean, there's no way THAT Grace would be interested in a place like this… Right?
I swallow dryly, looking around me, noticing that women and men are engaging in sensual dances, rubbing their nearly half-naked bodies that slide so easily, reminding me of last night, when Julian made my breasts slide down his abdomen.
Oh, no, no.
Closing my eyes, I feel a shiver run up my spine.
I'm dialing Grace's number, putting it to my ear, searching for a quieter place to talk… I pass by people staring at me with a mix of lust and curiosity, and give them political grins, hurrying with my phone attached to my ear.
Damn, Grace… where are you?
I keep calling. Two, three, five times.
She doesn't answer.
I put the phone against my forehead, closing my eyes tightly…
I'm leaving… Yeah, I'm leaving… I shouldn't even have left my house today! What is wrong with me?
When I turn sharply, I run into a hot solid wall and lose my balance, letting out a high-pitched scream.
Suddenly, firm hands are on my waist, supporting me so that I don't twist my foot on this high heel and spend the biggest embarrassment of my life, “Thank you…”
“What are you doing in this kind of place?” I hear an extremely familiar voice that sends unpleasant shivers down my spine.
I'm afraid to lift my eyes and realize that I'm not hallucinating….
“Honey, what did you come here to do?”
I raised my eyes confused, seeing his serious face… his jaw is so clenched it makes the muscle jump on his smooth face…
“What are *you* doing here?” I retort, pushing him hard across the chest, surprising myself with such a reaction — and surprising him too. “Besides a traitor, are you some kind of pervert?”
He seems genuinely offended by my words.
“I would never set foot in a place like that if it weren't for you.”
“So you're following me, Eric? Not only a traitor, a pervert, you're a stalker?”
“Would you stop talking to me that way?” Eric says firmly, squeezing my waist. Only then do I realize that he hasn't let me go.
“Or what? Are you going to hurt me?” I frown, seeing his expression of shock.
“No, honey, I would never hurt you-”
“Then let me go, Eric.” I push him hard again, and to my relief, he finally removes his dirty hands from me.
I take a step back, throwing my hair back behind my shoulders, looking around.
“Did you come here to meet someone?” He asks in between teeth, but loudly, so that I can hear him through the music.
“Yes. And that's definitely not your problem.” I cast my sharp eyes on him, and notice that he's looking me up and down, keeping his eyes on my thighs exposed by the tiny dress… especially on my thicc curves.
“I forgot how beautiful your body is…” Eric says, taking a step towards me, looking at me intensely, “I've been trying so hard for so long to respect you…. What if we just threw all that away?”
“Excuse me?”
Eric's hand slides up to my neck, and I try to push him away again, but my strength isn't enough to do it when he's really determined to get closer and envelop me in his disgusting arms.
“I want to have sex with you, Angel… I can't wait until marriage anymore, not when you show me your body like that. Let's do it. I don't need any other woman if you give me your-”
“You're crazy.” I punch his chest a few times, as hard as I can — “You're completely crazy. Have sex with you? You think that after four years in a relationship without touching me, now you have that right?”
“I did it for you.” He says with his lips close to my ear, “I didn't want my mother to criticize you…. I know how you see your own mother in her…”
I crunch my lips and keep trying to push him away, “You have no right to say something like that…. Don't talk about my mother-”
“Do you know how heartbroken Mother would be if she finds out we broke up? You're the daughter she always wanted… She loves you more than loves me, her own son, honey-”
“Stop it!” I push him hard, finally managing to get free. But that comes at a price because I twist my foot on that damn heel and let out a painful grunt.
I'm weeping, both from the hurt and from hearing him mention my mother in such a disgusting context… How dare he talk about her, using her in such a way? Using my feelings to tie me to him again?
I try to support my foot but notice that the heel has broken.
Damn. Eric is approaching me again… And I know I can't let him touch me… that I need to pull away because if I allow him, there won't be any strength left to pull myself free again.
But my ankle is hurting… And my heart is pounding in my chest, desperately.
I have to act now! Swallowing a painful groan, I rest my twisted foot on the floor, and.....
“Oh, what do we have here?” I hear a sweet, slightly familiar female voice, “I didn't imagine I would see Julian's girl in a place like this.”
*Julian's girl?*
I look back and swallow dry.
That tall, thin body… that blonde hair and blue eyes…. A familiar face.
“Hey, Juls…” She shouts and looks back, gesturing with her hand, “Looks like we have a little problem here.”