183 — “A ghost forever.”

“Hah, honestly… I tried to be nice to you, Angelee. But you…” She laughs crazy, shaking her head and looking at me with pleasure. “You really are something else, aren’t you?”
I look down, clutching the fabric of my shirt, too scared to look beyond my belly. My eyes are wet, and I fight the pain that grows in my belly, contractions that increase by the second.
“We could have gone through all this, but of course, you have to be stubborn… Yes, you *always* do what I hate most. It’s always like this... You keep pushing my patience, my urge to *hurt you.* But you know, if you had just taken me back quietly, I could try a little harder. We could be friends again, Angelee... so why do you always have to ruin everything?”
I caress my belly, my heart beating very, very fast. I’m in shock, completely lost. Even though Laura’s words pass by my ears, I can’t really understand them. All I can think about is the pain, the wetness between my legs, *my daughters.*
“If you hadn’t shown up at Eric’s apartment that time, none of this would have happened. He wouldn’t have left me. He wouldn’t be arrested. I wouldn’t have lost my job, my whole life, and I wouldn’t have had to pay a fortune for lawyers to escape the charge... And you, Angelee,” She points at me, clearly enjoying my suffering. “You wouldn’t be bleeding and killing the children in your womb. Don’t you see? It’s all your fault! You’re killing Julian Adams’ babies... how do you think he’ll feel when he finds out what you did? Do you think he will forgive you? No, Angelee… He will hate you, just like everyone around you does.”
*Bleeding? Killing?* None of this makes sense, no... I shake my head in complete denial.
But the pain is increasing, and I feel even wetter down there.
A sob escapes between my lips, and I give in to crying, even though she takes extreme pleasure in seeing me suffer.
“That’s right, go ahead and cry — it’s all your fault.”
I try to get up because I can’t be lying on the floor like that. I need to go to the hospital. I need to check on the babies! But still, there’s no strength in my legs. I really need to do something, but I can’t. I’m paralyzed, frozen.
*Do something, Angelee!*
I crawl across the floor, focusing on the elevator with its doors closed. My eyes lock onto the display that shows the numbers increasing; it’s getting closer and closer to my floor.
Laura also looks at the elevator, her laughter fading as she notices it.
She turns her eyes to me suspiciously, then scoffs, “Even until the end, you are still relying on others.”
Laura crouches down to my height, looking me straight in the eye. Insanity is all over her face. The lips are dry, and the pupils are so dilated that they barely show their irises; looking at them is the same as staring into space... It's so agonizing that I look away, with anger and resentment *and fear* bubbling inside me, but she grabs my chin and forces me to look at her.
“You always had everything I ever wanted… Even at the end of it all, you took everything. Tyler. A good position in the company. Money. A father who adores you. Julian Adams. A child… Everything, everything,*everything* I ever wanted — you have it all.” She says through her teeth, and I can finally see the real Laura, without masks, without manipulations, without false emotions. That’s the person she really is... And I can understand why she never shows it.
*I’ve never seen anything so ugly in my entire life.*
I force my face to the side, breaking her touch, and hold my shirt tighter, gathering the courage to do something, but that only makes her angrier and more impatient.
Laura stands up and grabs my hair, pulling hard enough to break a few strands. I try to free myself, but she drags me across the floor, trying to take me back to the apartment. Desperate, I look at the elevator that's taking too long, and I try to free her hand from my hair, scratching at her wrists, but all she does is grunt with a bearable pain. So I kick and punch her back and waist, trying with all my might to avoid being locked inside there.
*All I can imagine is that there are several things in the apartment that could really hurt me.*
Laura finally gives up and lets go of my head violently, pushing me again, this time with my belly against the floor.
Pain fills all my senses, and I shout, *“Help! Please, someone help me!”*
She laughs and caresses my face with her knuckles, brushing aside the hair that sticks to my cheek, wet with tears, “Don’t you know that nobody can listen to you here? Blame your fancy building, darling.”
Laura is crazy, she’s definitely crazy...
“Do you know? You know, I should have killed you a long time ago. If it weren't for you, all of this would be mine. You took my place, Angelee, and I'm going to take it back.” She says in a soft voice. “And even if I can’t take everything you have… I will torment you. I will be a ghost in your life, and my shadow will always accompany you… Do you get it?”
My eyes widen at these confusing words, this veiled threat that only brings more distress. But Laura lets go of me and gets up, taking a few steps back, still looking down on me.
“I'll haunt you for the rest of your life.” She says with an insane, twisted smile… *“Even if I die.”*
The elevator door opens, and Laura gives you a jolt. She looks at me, slightly desperate, as if she's confused… And seeing that things won’t end well, she runs towards the emergency stairwell door, disappearing at the same moment that footsteps come in my direction.
Only then do I remember how to breathe.
“Angelee?” Cathy throws herself to the ground, scraping her knees. She takes my face in her hands, wiping away the tears with her thumbs. Her touch is so different from Laura’s; I can feel tenderness within the heat of her palm and her fingerprints. I can see the concern in her eyes, especially when she lowers them and looks at my legs. “What-”
Before she could finish, strong arms wrapped around me and easily lifted me off the ground. I look at the man holding me, meeting Tyler’s furious face as he quickly carries me to the elevator.
Cathy gets up hastily and follows him, frantically pressing the button for the first floor, smashing her finger over and over while the doors close too slowly. She seems to be shaking a lot and fighting back tears, unlike Tyler, who doesn’t even flinch.
I feel strange. Despite the pain, I feel like I’m becoming more and more numb. The adrenaline is lowering; maybe that’s why my heart is beating slower. My friends seem nervous, and I want to tell them I’ll be okay, but my trembling lips don’t make a sound. I don’t have the strength to say comforting words or to move my body.
*“Call her husband.”* Tyler’s voice is serious and composed, but why does he sound so angry? *“She’s bleeding.”*
*“I know, I know…”* Cathy says, choking, picking up her cell phone with shaking hands… Or I think she is since my head is spinning.
Damn, everything is getting dark around me.
When I notice, I no longer feel Tyler’s arms. In fact, it feels like I’m lying down, but I can’t move a single muscle, not even the tip of my index finger.
My body is heavy, running fast, with loud voices mixing and making it difficult to understand. They seem to say something about *saturation, anesthesia, and emergency surgery,* but my heavy eyelids won’t let me open my eyes and see what’s going on. Still, I can feel movement over my lying body, dragged down an endless corridor.
On the edge of consciousness, my daughters are my only concern, and I pray to the heavens that they are okay.
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[…] Where am I? There is nothing around. I’m trapped in an empty, dark space where I can’t see the end. Even if I turn my body and look at every corner, there is nothing but shadows.
**My shadow will always accompany you.**
I’m surrounded by darkness. Laura’s voice seems to echo around me; it’s dancing with the nasty notes and her promise to torment me.
**I will be a ghost forever.**
**I will always torment you.**
I scream at the top of my lungs, hoping my frustration is louder than Laura’s words that blend with her laughter.
Her wickedness is suffocating me.
I’m crying, covering my ears, with my eyes squeezed shut, but even if I open them, there’s nothing but darkness surrounding me. *I’m stuck with it anyway.*
Even if my legs continue to go straight or take curves, I don’t stop running. There is no end, no edge, just this endless cycle of pain.
**I will haunt you for the rest of your life.**
*“Wake up, my love… I need you.”* Julian’s voice comes soft and low, but I can still hear it through my torment.
I lower my hands, leaving my ears attentive.
*“We need you.”*
I look around, looking for his presence in the midst of this darkness... And I find a faint light far, far away.
*“Why doesn’t she wake up?”*
*“There is nothing wrong with her physically. It was probably the shock. She will wake up any moment.”*
I am trying.
I’m running toward the light, but it still seems far away.. even though my legs hurt from running so much — even though I’m losing my breath, I keep running.
*“Is there nothing you doctors can do?”*
*“We can just wait.”*
**Don’t you see? It’s all your fault.**
**Everyone hates you.**
**Wouldn’t it be better to continue sleeping?**
I’m finally approaching the light.
I reach out, touching the warm light with my fingertips… And the world seems to draw itself to me again.
All my memories flash before my eyes. The child who received love from my mother. Her face that I had trouble remembering. Her voice that once sang me lullabies. Her kiss on my forehead and the caress in my hair as she puts me to sleep.
Her pale face on the hospital bed with lips that always smiled and comforted me. Her body going down, six feet under. The flakes that fell from the sky to the palm of my hand, and the snow that gathered on the sidewalks of New York City. Julian’s green eyes looked at me with concern for the first time.
My father’s comforting hugs, his effort to make me happy, to make up for lost time. Amusement parks, trips abroad, and theater to watch silly rom-com films that he hated but struggled to handle.
The trip to Spain... my first kiss with my first love.
And years later, the second kiss with Julian, when I knocked on his door and asked him to fuck me. His shocked face, the desire in his eyes.
Every kiss, every touch, every moan.
The smell of his cologne, the goosebumps he brought to my skin.
The first time we heard our daughters’ hearts on the scan, our wedding, the vows of eternal love...
All these moments flash before me, dazzled by the light, and disappear in the next moment — when my eyes finally open.