Chapter111
Allen knew that Lena's last words were some kind of warning. This isn't her life and she is just filling in for someone right now. As soon as Joanna comes back, she is going to go back to her life and Joanna is going to pick up her life from where she left it. For the reason, she should not get too involved. She is going to give it up anyway. Allen did not get angry. She knew that this was going to come sooner or later. But why did she get sad when she realized that she won't Raymond again when all of this is over?
It wasn't as if she even liked him. He is a complete jerk.
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Raymond woke up with a terrible headache. He looked around the room that he was sleeping in. No....this isn't his room. In fact, this isn't his house. What is he doing here?
He tried to remember the events of last night. Yesterday, he was really angry when he saw Paul dropping off Allen. She had chated with him so much but immediately she entered the house, she acted as if she was walking on thin ice. She could not even have a proper conversation with him. She was trying to avoid him.
He lost his temper with her and he lost control of himself last night. He even kissed her! Why did he do something like that? What had gotten over him? Since when wasn't he able to control himself in front of a person? Why does that woman have this kind of effect on him? For the past eleven years, he has been living his life without any emotions at all, waiting for one person.
But ever since this woman came along, it seemed as if she was breaking through all the defense that he had built around himself. Last night, he was really on tt verge of losing control of himself and doing something to her. It was a good thing that she left the house. If he had not left, he did not want to think about what he would have done to her.
But how did he end up in this place? He remembered going to the bar because he just wanted to forget about it all. He wanted to get rid of all thoughts of Allen from his head. But after drinking so much last night, he found out that it wasn't working at all. No matter how much he drank, he could not forget about her at all. He kept thinking of her over and over again.
He remembered that a woman has walked up to him and tried to talk to him last night. Nothing happened right? He did not make a mistake right? But this isn't right.
He walked away from her last night. There was no way that he could have done anything with her. Besides, last night, he had found out, that besides Allen, there isn't a woman who can have any kind of effect on him.
So how did he get here? He continued to rack his brain until he remembered it.
Ryder! Because he did not want to go home, he had called him over yesterday. He did not know what he was going to do if he saw that woman so he felt that it was for the good of the both of them that he stayed away from her. At least for last night. So that he won't do something to her that he will regret.
He called Ryder last night. He was the one who came to pick him up. This must be his house.
Just then, the door opened And Ryder walked on. He was right. This is his house.
Ryder saw that Raymond was awake. He did not bother to ask him how he was feeling. He just went straight to what he wanted to say.
"When have you ever drank so much that you needed someone to take care of you? What happened to you Raymond? I was really surprised when I received your call. Why did you drink so much? Is there something wrong?" Ryder asked him.
Raymond sighed. Of course something was wrong. Everything is wrong. When did he become like this? Because of Allen, he drank so much that he even had to call someone. This is too much. He had to put a stop to this before it gets out of hand. He can't afford it. He just can't analyze these feelings that were spreading onside his heart.
"Thanks for coming last night. I need to get to work" Raymond said. The both of them knew that he was trying to avoid the topic.
But Ryder did not have any intention of letting him leave. He wanted to get the answers from him.
"What really happened to you last night? Don't think that you will be able to get out of this if you don't tell me anything. What was it? Why you were like that last night?" Ryder asked.
Raymond looked at his friend. He knew that he was not going to let him go if he doesn't tell him. Raymond sighed. He thought that maybe he should tell Ryder. Maybe he will be able to help him figure out what exactly is wrong with him.
"I need you to help me figure out something Ryder. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't think that I'm my usual self at all. Yesterday... Because of that woman....I lost control of myself. Why do I care what she does? What does it have to do with me if she comes with home with someone else or if she is late? So why will I lose my temper because of something like that? It doesn't have anything to do with me so why do I care so much? What has happened to me?" Raymond said.
Ryder had a vague idea of what he was talking about. But he still asked to be sure. "Who are you talking about? Is it the woman you married? Joanna Anrerson?"
[3/16, 7:02 PM] Sonia:
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