Chapter 61

Paul looked at her face. What is she so happy about? Wasn't she the one who was about to cry just a few minutes ago because of Raymond? When did it all change that she is smiling this happily now? "What happened to you Allen? Weren't you so sad just a few minutes ago? What happened that you are smiling so happily?" Paul asked. He really could not stop himself from asking.
Allen looked up at her. "It's you. I'm smiling because of you" She said.
Paul was shocked. Smiling because of him? What is that supposed to mean? "What do you mean Allen? Smiling because of me? What did I do?" He asked.
"You said that you are going to help me. It's the first time, someone has offered me help" Allen said.
Paul looked at her. First time someone offered to help her? Maybe this woman is not as simple as she looks? She looks like quite a simple woman who hasn't been through a lot at first glance because she was always smiling and in a cheerful mood but she did not seem as simple as that. At least, he could see that she has a hard life. At the hospital that day...he still remembered the things that the doctor has said to him. She only agreed to do this for her grandmother right?
"You....you've been through a lot right?" Paul asked.
Allen smiled. She did have a lot going on but she also knew that they were people who had more worse off lives than her. And besides, even rich people have thier own problems.
Instead of answering that question, she has something that she wanted to ask him. She was really curious about Joanna. If she really had any intention of playing that woman for the next six months, she had to know some things right?
"Joanna....what kind of a woman is she?" Allen finally asked the question that has been on her mind for a few days now.
Paul was taken aback when he heard her ask the question. But he could almost guess where it was coming from. He had seen her talking with that Sonia when he went to her earlier after all. Just how much did Sonia scare her?
Paul too did not know what has happened between Sonia and Joanna. When he asked Joanna she told him that it was a petty conflict. She wasn't perfect and she had gotten into am argument with her once. That was all he knew....as to what that petty conflict entailed, he really did not know.
"Are you asking me this because of Sonia? What exactly did she say to you?" Paul asked. He was starting to get worried.
Allen nodded her head. She was asking because of that. But it wasn't only her, even her family, she really wanted to know just what kind of a woman Joanna is. On the first day she agreed to play Joanna, when Paul drove her to her house, he had told her that Joanna is a lovely woman, who has struggled hard to make a name for herself. That she is a good woman. Right now, Allen wasn't so sure about that description.
"Yes, she kept saying some things to me. She mentioned something that happened five years ago. She also told me not to put up an act in front of her and that she can clearly see what I am trying to do. She spoke of Joanna as if...she is a really bad woman and her arch nemesis....what really is Joanna like?" Allen asked.
Mike frowned. He pinched the space between his brows. Why would Sonia say such things? Is it that the conflict between the both of them is actually more serious than he thought? He too did not even know what happened five years ago!
"You really don't have to mind the things that Sonia said to you. She and Joanna never really got along. Well, this industry is actually quite competitive and it's quite normal to fall out with quite a few people. They don't like each other but thier conflict isn't as simple as Joanna being all bad and Sonia being all good" Paul asked..
Allen looked at Paul. He is always like this when he talks about Joanna. It was as if he carried....a faint hint of emotion?
"Is that so? I thought that..." Allen did not get a chance to finish.
"You don't need to think anything Allen. Joanna is a good woman. She suffered so much for her career. I can understand why she decided to just leave. After being through so much by herself, why does her uncle think that he can sell her out for his own benefits? Anyway, Joanna is a really good woman, you don't need to care about what other people are saying" Paul said.
Allen smiled. She was sure of it now. "You like Joanna right?" Allen asked with a smile on her face.
Paul was drinking a cup of water when she asked him that. He almost choked on the water. What is she talking about?
"What are you talking about? Joanna and I have been friends for eleven years. Our relationship is not like that" Paul quickly denied it. He already accepted the fact that he can only be like Joanna's shadow, protecting her from the side.
Allen nodded her head knowingly. Actually, she should have seen it coming. He is always talking about her with so much emotion in his voice...of course she is definitely someone that he likes. Just because he is her friend doesn't mean that he can't like her right?.
"You have been friends for eleven years,.does this mean that you have liked her for eleven years? You really are persistent Paul" Allen said. When she wanted to be smart, there was nothing that you could hide from her.
"You..." Paul realized just then that there was nothing that he could hide from this woman. She already saw through him, that he is in love with Joanna. He didn't just like her...he had been in love with Joanna for so long...his feelings for her...they had never been any less...but he also knew his limits, he and Joanna probably really can't be together with him. If not for what happened, she would have already married that man. He didn't want much. As long as he can be by her side like this, he was content with just about anything. That was how much he was in love with her.
"You...how did you know that?" Paul ended up asking. He really wanted to know how she was able to figure out that he is in love with her. Even someone as smart as Joanna wasn't able to figure it out. How did she do it?
Allen smiled even more. "It's quite easy to know from the way you talk about her. Any one will be able to tell that you are in love with her. If you were trying to hide your feelings for her, you were not doing a really good job of it Paul. It's written all over you" Allen said with a smile. It's something that she should have noticed since a long time ago but she was too busy, caught up with trying to keep up with Joanna's life that she did not have much time to think about it. But now that the both of them were sitting down together talking like this, she could finally see for herself just how much the man was in love with Joanna.
Paul sighed. Is what she said right? That everyone can see that she is in love with Joanna? But for eleven years, why didn't Joanna realize that she is in love with him? "You said that anyone can realize that I'm in love with Joanna right? But she did not seem to notice it at all" Paul said. There was a hint of complaining in his voice. If she had noticed his feelings then maybe there would have been a chance for the both of them to be together?
Allen thought for a minute. It was either Joanna was so used to having him as a friend around that she did not think that he would ever like her or it was that she already knew about his feelings but she chose to ignore it. It was probably the first right?
"I'm not too sure about that Paul. Maybe it was because she was so used to having your around that she did not think that you would have such feelings for her" Allen said.
Paul sighed. Maybe he and Joanna were meant to be friends. There isn't supposed to be anything more between thier relationship.
Allen could not understand something. "If you loved her so much why didn't you tell her about how you feel about her? I think...a lot of things could have been prevented if you had told her about how you are feeling" Allen said. For one thing, Joanna won't have run away and she won't be here right now. She would not have met either one of them.
Paul sighed and let his eyes fall. He wanted to tell her too, he wanted to tell her about his feelings every single time that he was with her, but there was always something pulling him back. There was always something stopping him. Joanna is his friend. What would it be like if she rejected him? Would thier relationship get awkward and weird then? Even if he can't be with her, he still wanted to be around her as her friend. That was all he wanted, to be near her.
"I really wanted to tell her too. I really wanted to tell her that I was in love with her but in the end I could not do it. I could not bring myself to confess to her. And then, things just happened. She was supposed to get married but she did not want to get married so she left." Paul said. If he had told her and she accepted, Joanna would not have run away.
Allen looked at him. She figured out something. "I can get what is going on here. You love her but you were never able to tell her your feelings because you kept hesitating. When it comes to love, you don't have to be such a coward. It's better to just go for it" Allen said.
Paul's gaze landed on her and she realized almost immediately that she had said something wrong. She immediately decided to fix it. "That's not what I meant Paul. You are not a coward, it's just that..." Allen tried to explain but he raised his hand, stopping all he words.
"No. You don't need to feel bad. You've said the truth. I get it. I finally get it now. I'm a coward. I've always been a coward. I kept considering so many things that weren't actually important, it was just me trying to stop myself because I was afriad of what was going to happen after that. You are right. I really am a coward. If I had been a little bit more brave...then things won't be like this right now. A lot of things could have been prevented" he said.
Allen did not mean to be rude to him or hurt his feelings but those things were actually the truth. He should be able to face them now right? He should have been a little more courageous. "Actually..." Allen was going to say something when she felt like someone was standing behind her. She looked at Paul. He had his entire attention of whoever was behind him.
Allen swallowed a gulp. She could really guess who was standing behind her right now. She turned and Raymond's cold aloof and handsome face met hers.
"What do you think that you are doing right now Joanna?" He asked. Was there anger in his voice?
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Ryan got down from the private plan and looked around the airport. This place, is actually exactly the same. He did not have any intentions of coming back soon. He came because....well he saw the news. What really happened when he was not here?
That iceberg actually got married. But his marriage has nothing to do with him. It was the person her married. How did that even happen? But what shocked him the most was why her name was Joanna Anderson instead of Allen Cathers!
[2/1, 5:59 PM] Sonia:

His substitute bride
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