Chapter 81

When Allen woke up again, it was already ten in the morning. She rubbed her eyes before sitting up on tht couch. She knew that her face must be a complete mess right now. She had cried herself to sleep last night. It was just that she did not know what she was supposed to do. How was she supposed to continue to hold on like this? Raymond already knows everything. She could not help but he scared of that man. Thinking of him, she wondered if he had not come back last night. Allen saw that a blanket had fallen off her when she sat up. She did not cover herself with a blanket last night before she went to bed. How did it get to her?
Last night...that man...did he? Allen did not want to think about it. In fact she stoped herself from thinking about it immediately. It did not make any sense to her. She had to think carefully about what she was supposed to do. She thought that she should tell Lena and Paul. After all, they were the ones who asked her to do this. She could keep Sonia and Ryan from them because Ryan was her own problem and she had dealt with Sonia on her own but she definitely won't be able to keep Raymond finding out about this from them. She had to tell them, maybe they would be able to figure out what to do. She did not want to get people who had helped her so much in trouble but she also did not have a choice.
Allen was left all alone in the house. She did not know what she was supposed to do from now on. She was already shaking in fear. He said that he was going to think about it. What would be the outcome of her thinking? Her biggest fear right now was her grandmother. She did not want anything to happen to her. She did not want her to be affected by the mess that she had caused. When her grandmother had asked her about what kind of work she was doing she had kicked up a fuss and told her not to worry because she did not want her to know. How will she react when she gets to know this news?
Allen raised her head up instinctively and checked the time. It was almost time for Lena to come pick her up so they could go to the filming set, but she did not think that she would be able to go today. She did not even have the strength to get up from the couch that she was sitting on. All the events of yesterday were greatly straining her out and making her weak. First Sonia found out about it and she had to convince her to not tell anyone about it. Then she found out that Ryan was back. As if it wasn't enough, Raymond had to figure out that she isn't Joanna somehow and now she doesn't even know what he is going to do about her. How was she supposed to concentrate in a situation like this?
The door bell rang and Allen went to open it. She already knew that it was Lena. She was the one who would come to see her at this time. Lena stepped into the house when Allen opened the door. She scanned Allen from head to toe. She could see that she was not dressed. In fact, she looked like a complete mess. They were also two big black circles around her eyes. What is going on with her? She had always told Allen to pay good afternoon to her appearance and image. She had to stand in front of the camera and act today. How is she going to do that if she looks like such a complete mess today? But wasn't she fine yesterday? She was even happy about her grandmother!
"What happened to you Allen? You are not even dressed yet! What the hell is going on with you? And look at you, you look like such a complete mess right now! I told you that you always have to pay good attention to your image and appearance. How are you going to stand in front of people and the camera if you look like such a mess and you have those dark circles around your eyes? What is going on with you? Have you been crying? You need to always remember that you are standing in for Joanna right now! You need to remember that when you go out you are Joanna! You should do a good job of this!" Lena was so angry that shs was harsh when scolding Allen.
Allen could not listen to her complaints anymore. She felt really wronged. She has had a difficult time all through yesterday. Her entire life all through yesterday has been a complete mess. She had been so sloppy with her act of being Joanna Anderson that Sonia, the arch nemesis of Joanna just had to find out that she was pitying on a show. As if that wasn't enough, when she was finally relived after hearing that her grandmother was better she also had to find out that that physopath Ryan was back. And then after that, Raymond figured out that she isn't Joanna. She had no idea what was going to happen to her. How can she listen to this scolding without getting hurt? Her tears started to flow freely.
Lena was already feeling guilty when she stoped talking to Allen. She had been doing a really good job lately and when she made a small mistake, she did not hesitate to say all of those hurtful things to her. She felt bad for Allen. She was going to apologise to her when she saw that Allen was crying. Lena felt even worse. Obviously, she had gone over board with her words. What was she supposed to do now? "Allen, don't be angry. I was feeling frustrated and I took it out on you. Don't get angry. It's just that.. you should have been ready by now" Lena said. She saw that Allen was still crying. Lena realised that something was wrong. "What happened Allen?" She asked.
Allen looked at her. She knew that she won't be able to keep it from her. She needs to tell her the truth. Even though she doesn't want them to know because she did not want the people who had helped her so much to be in some kind of trouble because of her she still knew that she had to tell them. Because that was the only way that they would be able to think of something to do. At that moment, Allen thought of just giving everything up and stop pretending to be Joanna Anderson. She would be more at peace then. But she immediately decided against it. Her grandmother was already well. It would seem like since she did not have anymore problems she doesn't need them anymore and she was running away. Shs did not want to give that impression to them at all.
[2/22, 8:00 PM] Sonia: Allen had never been someone to run away from her responsibilities. She would see to it to the end. It was just that this time, she did not really know how she was supposed to deal with that man. "Lena, I have something really important to say to you. I hope that you won't get angry. Yesterday, something big happened. Raymond...he already knows that I am not Jo okanna. I don't know how he managed to find that out. I did everything that you've told me to do. I even tried to stay out of his way because I did not want him to suspect anything about me not being Joanna. But he still managed to find out. I really don't know what I should do now Lena. I'm confused" Allen said. Will he really listen to her and let this pass? It wasn't as if he and Joanna were really married anyway. About him but believing that Joanna has really run away, Allen thought that it was strange too. Everyone else thought the same thing. There was no reason for her to run away from the marriage that she had been talking about so much. Only Paul was convinced that she ran away. Oh well, they could talk about it slowly. First, they had to deal with this.
Lena looked at her with her mouth wide open. What is she talking about? Raymond already knows that she is not Joanna? What are they going to do about this? How are they going to solve this problem now? This was definitely a big issue. "What happened Allen? How did he end up finding out about it?" Lena asked. He wasn't supposed to know. She was sure that the both of them did not know each other really well, so how did he find out? Even her family was unable to tell the difference.