Chapter 167 Rejection
Walking on the forest path, I was also thinking about what to do tonight. With such strong wind, will the boatman still take the boat out? And it's already late. I should give the boatman a call later to ask. If not, I'll have to stay at a hotel in the resort on this island. Thinking about my experience tonight, I couldn't help but shake my head and smile bitterly.
Just as I walked out of the woods and was about to reach the entrance of the power station, I saw the figures of Nathan and Katniss. I quickly hid in the nearby weeds, luckily I noticed them in time and reacted fast, otherwise it would have been bad if Nathan and Katniss found me. The black clothes I was wearing provided me with the best visual camouflage at night. I watched Nathan and Katniss through the thick grass.
From a distance, I could see Katniss and Nathan pulling each other, still talking about something. Despite being downwind, I could still hear a few sentences, "Let go of me, stop pulling me." "Calm down, it's very dangerous to take the boat now."
In order to hear Nathan and Katniss clearly, I crawled forward in the grass. Fortunately, the grass here was thick enough, so I didn't dirty my body or hurt myself. Crawling carefully on the grass, the sound of the wind rustling the grass provided me with the best cover. As I got closer to Nathan and Katniss, their voices gradually became clearer.
"If you still think of yourself as my father, then let go of me. I must go back tonight." Katniss kept pulling her hand, trying to pull it out of Nathan's hand. The cool breeze blew, lifting Katniss's already messy long hair. She seemed very determined at this moment, still angry.
"Katniss, can you please listen to me? For your safety, please don't leave. Trust me, tonight you'll have one bedroom, I'll have another, I won't touch you, okay?" Nathan firmly held onto Katniss, earnestly persuading her. The cold wind had sobered up the two who were drunk. Through Nathan's words, it felt like he was sincere when he said that.
"Do you think I will still believe you? What are you thinking? You think I don't know? You big liar, let go of me, I'd rather die than stay here tonight." Katniss said firmly to Nathan, showing her anger towards Nathan's coercion and intrusion tonight.
Katniss's resolute words were undoubtedly very impactful. Nathan suddenly stopped in his tracks, standing there at a loss, while Katniss stared at him firmly. Perhaps Katniss had misunderstood Nathan's intentions, but only Nathan knew what was really going on. Seeing Nathan's reaction, Katniss felt his grip loosen, so she quickly pulled her hand away from Nathan's. But seeing Nathan's stunned expression, Katniss knew that her tone and attitude just now might have hurt him. A hint of regret flashed across Katniss's face.
"I'm sorry, Dad, I was harsh. But I really can't stay here tonight. The situation between us, we can't blame it all on either side, we both have responsibilities. Let's consider tonight as a farewell. You're getting married, I sincerely wish you a happy old age. Treat Jennifer well. You'll still be my father in the future. I hope we can both forget all this as soon as possible and be a happy family." Katniss softened her tone, saying to Nathan, as if bidding farewell to him, also comforting herself. But I knew that in Katniss's words, there were some insincere feelings, she was not as calm as she claimed, there were some hidden emotions she had not expressed. If I hadn't witnessed everything as a bystander, if I hadn't seen the diaries Katniss had written before, I would never have felt the different emotions in Katniss's words.
Upon hearing Katniss's words, Nathan knew that everything was about to end. Although he had mentally prepared himself long ago, hearing Katniss say it like that, and actually facing it all, Nathan closed his eyes in pain, his body starting to tremble slightly, whether from the cold or from his heart being cold. I couldn't see Nathan's expression clearly, but I could hear his breathing and see his trembling lips, I knew Nathan was holding back tears. Nathan wasn't pretending to be pitiful, his sorrow was genuine, at least this kind of sad expression couldn't be faked. As an elder, crying in front of a younger person was so embarrassing, but at that moment, Nathan couldn't contain it.
I couldn't see Nathan's expression, but Katniss could. She saw Nathan's expression, knowing she had deeply hurt his heart, but she bit her lip firmly, then turned her body, facing away from Nathan. As a bystander, I clearly saw Katniss turning away, discreetly wiping her eyes with her hand. How could Katniss appear so indifferent to their emotions, when she had rejected it all so decisively? She had refused it all with a heavy heart, wanting to end it all completely.
Katniss took slow steps towards the gate, but she walked slowly, no longer as fast and determined as before. Seeing Katniss's pace and back, I felt that Katniss didn't have the same determination in her heart as she had just shown, there was a hint of hesitation in her steps, and her shoulders were trembling slightly. Seeing Katniss's back, I knew she was silently crying.
Meanwhile, Nathan, with tears streaming down his face, watched Katniss's back, not knowing how to stop her from taking risks. Nathan wiped his eyes, feeling helpless, but his body language revealed his inner anxiety. Finally, he made a decision, his eyes suddenly showing determination.
I heard a sound of something hitting the ground, and Katniss and I couldn't help but turn our heads towards Nathan. What we saw in front of us left both Katniss and me stunned. We saw the elderly Nathan, regardless of his status, kneeling on the ground, wiping tears, and we didn't know why. And the direction he knelt in was right towards Katniss's back.
"Dad, what are you doing?" Katniss, after a brief moment of shock, quickly ran back to help Nathan up, but Katniss's slender body couldn't lift Nathan. She could only ask Nathan with a tearful expression.
Seeing Nathan like this, I almost stood up from the grass. Was Nathan apologizing to Katniss? But isn't this way of apologizing too serious? Could it be that Nathan deliberately did all this falsely? If Nathan intentionally did this to win back Katniss's heart, then the Nathan in my mind would be too hypocritical and terrifying. Thinking about this, I felt a lot more estranged from Nathan, sensing a frightening side of him, because I never expected Nathan to kneel down regardless of his status in this extreme way to try to keep Katniss.
"Katniss, please, don't leave. I'm not stopping you with any other intentions, it's really because it's impossible to take the boat out now. If you insist on leaving, I can take the boat out for you. But if something goes wrong, I don't care about my life, but if something happens to you, how can I atone for it? Trust my experience, I beg you, please don't take the risk." Nathan knelt and pleaded with Katniss. Hearing this, I couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief, so that's it. Nathan was worried about Katniss being in danger, so he came up with this method. He had been persuading Katniss for a long time, but Katniss didn't listen, leaving Nathan no choice but to use this extreme way to advise her.
Nathan's thoughts were right. The visibility was poor at night, and with such strong wind, the boat for crossing the river was very small. In this situation, taking the boat out would be as risky as a leaf on the river surface, so I didn't doubt what Nathan said. And Nathan suddenly rushing out in just his underwear to stop Katniss earlier was also because of all this.
"I'm speaking from the heart, there's absolutely no other motive. Please believe me, I don't want you in any danger." No matter how Katniss tried to help, Nathan wouldn't get up.
"Okay, okay, I believe you. I won't leave, can you please get up first?" Katniss couldn't lift Nathan, feeling suddenly at a loss. It was very unexpected for her that an elder would kneel down to her, disrupting her thoughts. In order to get Nathan up quickly, she had no choice but to agree to Nathan. Anyway, I was on a business trip tonight, and Katniss had nothing to worry about.
Upon hearing Katniss finally agreeing, Nathan couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief. With Katniss's support, Nathan slowly got up.
As soon as Nathan stood up, he stumbled. Nathan had knelt too hard just now, and for so long, his two knees were red. Being old and not in good health to begin with, this one action had caused Nathan quite a bit of pain. Nathan stumbled. Katniss quickly supported him. Facing each other, Nathan stumbled forward, falling on Katniss, who had stepped forward to support him, and the two coincidentally embraced each other unintentionally.
With the rustling of the wind covering my movements, I crawled forward again, and from this position, I could see the profiles of Nathan and Katniss. The sudden embrace of the two made them pause for a moment. It was clear that it was unintentional, but it happened coincidentally.
Time seemed to stop at that moment, with only the swaying grass, the rushing river, and the chilling wind, indicating that time was slowly slipping away. The two embraced each other, neither rejecting nor pushing away, quietly feeling each other's body warmth. The emotions buried deep in their hearts seemed to burst out at this moment, Nathan's love for Katniss, Katniss's reluctance towards Nathan, and the touch of Nathan sacrificing himself to kneel down and ask her to avoid danger, all of it was released through the physical contact between them.
Their bodies hugged tighter and tighter, finally resting their heads on each other's shoulders. Their hands wrapped around each other's backs. At this moment, there were no words or sounds, only the touch of their bodies conveying their innermost emotions. Perhaps silence was more powerful than words at this moment.
"Katniss, I really can't bear to let you go. Although I've never said the word 'love' to you, you are the one for me. Because I dare not say 'love', and I don't have the right to say 'love', I can only bury it in my heart. But if I don't say it now, I'll never have the chance. I won't ruin your relationship with Kevin , nor can I do that, but I know everything has to end now. So I'll say it to you once, and it will be forever hidden in my heart." Nathan suddenly confessed these words to Katniss, although he didn't say the words 'I love you', but I knew that's what he meant. However, Nathan still didn't have the courage to say it out loud, seemingly the ethical and moral values in his heart prevented him from ever saying it, but he expressed it to Katniss on this final night, perhaps to resolve the regrets in his heart.
"I know, but my love belongs only to Kevin . Besides care, I can't give you any love. Perhaps in the next life, maybe, actually, we were a mistake from the beginning, a mistake that is intoxicating yet extremely painful." Katniss buried her head on Nathan's shoulder, murmuring, and the last sentence made my heart ache, not knowing if Katniss was comforting Nathan or speaking her true feelings.
"Dad, do you think I'm a bad woman?"
"No, you're a good woman. The bad person is me. I'm not a qualified father, all the responsibility lies with me. If we both die, I hope you can go to heaven and let me go to hell, let me bear all the punishment alone." Nathan spoke sweet words, unintentionally breaking down Katniss's resolute defenses.
The two murmured sweet words to each other, expressing their final emotions and innermost thoughts to each other.
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