Chapter 210
After Katniss struggled to stand up straight, the two of us slowly walked down the stairs. At that moment, neither Katniss nor I knew where to go. Should we go home? But is that still our home? Legally, we have no relationship anymore. All I can do now is go home and pack up my personal belongings. Even though I've decided to give all the property to Katniss, there are some personal items that I must take.
Katniss's body had gone limp, and at that moment she seemed to have no strength left to cry. Numbly, we got into the car. Although I appeared calm on the surface, I was deeply saddened and upset when signing the papers. Upon reflection, the outcome today was not entirely Katniss and Nathan's fault, but rather a result of my actions. I know that the situation has led to divorce, and speaking of it, I have been irresponsible to say the least. I am not living up to being a man. However, there is no turning back now. Despite being criticized by everyone, I must go through with it. The scene at the Little Island Wedding Dress store keeps haunting me, making me want to escape. I know that after this incident, the trajectory of my life will be completely altered.
As the car slowly moved forward, it was not heading towards a destination, but towards the end of me and Katniss. When we arrived home, Katniss and I slowly went upstairs. After entering the room, I surveyed the house once again, then took out my suitcase that I always use for business trips. I started packing my clothes and essentials. Meanwhile, Katniss sat on the couch in silence, seemingly devoid of any soul.
I had thought that Katniss would talk to me once we got home, but she didn't. She just sat there quietly, not even blinking for a long time, which was somewhat eerie. By now, my heart had also grown numb. Due to the limited space in the suitcase, I had to take only the things I needed the most. Soon enough, I finished packing and placed the suitcase in the living room. When the heavy suitcase hit the floor, Katniss's eyes finally showed a hint of emotion. She looked up at the suitcase on the living room floor, then glanced at me, her eyes filled with a sense of desolation.
The thing I was most worried about regarding divorcing Katniss was undoubtedly her state of mind. Ever since I set up Nathan and Katniss, Nathan ended up in the hospital, almost losing his life, and I ended up in the hospital after falling off a cliff, almost never waking up. I didn't want Katniss to end up in the hospital or worse. I divorced her hoping that everything could come to an end, and life could start anew. After I leave, how will Katniss live? Will she remarry? Or will she continue her relationship with Nathan? I no longer care about any of this. At this moment, I am just a coward who abandoned Katniss and Nathan, a coward who only knows how to escape.
Glancing at the time, I realized it was almost time to pick up Simon from school. I planned to take him and leave immediately. I intended to buy a train ticket to Seabreeze Harbor. The journey from my home to Seabreeze Harbor would take nearly 40 hours. I would sit on the train, watching the scenery of each city we passed. Whichever city's scenery captivated me, I would get off with Simon and start anew. So, I had no specific destination in mind for where I would go next; everything would be left to fate.
"Are you leaving tonight?" Katniss, who had been sitting on the couch while I stared at the clock on the wall, finally spoke. Her words were filled with sadness and depression. I didn't answer her, just nodded slightly. Seeing me focused on the time on the clock, she understood that I was getting ready to pick up Simon and leave.
"Let's have one more dinner together, just the three of us with Simon. I'll cook for you personally, for the last time." Tears welled up in Katniss's eyes as she made this request. I turned away. Honestly, I just wanted to escape as soon as possible, to leave this house where everything kept replaying in my mind. But I couldn't refuse Katniss's request. Was this request too much given all the years of our relationship?
In the end, I nodded again. Katniss stopped crying and revealed a faint, bittersweet smile. Katniss's smile had always been so sunny and beautiful, but in recent times, it had lost that positivity. Glancing at the time, she stood up, took off her coat, realizing she hadn't taken it off since coming home.
"I'll cook dinner at home while you go pick up the child. I'll just cook whatever I feel like." Katniss's tone was very weak, and it was the first time I had seen her in such a fragile state.
Katniss busied herself in the kitchen, and after waiting for a while, I went downstairs to drive to pick up Simon. While driving, I kept thinking about Katniss's state today. Undoubtedly, it was the first time I had seen Katniss in such a state. The lifelessness in her eyes made me uneasy, and I couldn't shake the feeling that something would happen to Katniss after I left. It seemed that before I left, I had to make some preparations and plans. After picking up Simon, I returned home. Katniss quickly prepared dinner, just two simple dishes, not extravagant, but they were my favorite home-cooked dishes and the most frequently eaten dishes I had had so far. Of course, they were also Katniss's specialty. Simon, being young, was unaware that he had become part of a single-parent family, legally without a mother, with only Nathan as a guardian. When he entered, he greeted Katniss with a smile and headed straight for the dining table. He didn't have any special talents, just a big appetite, which kept him healthy and strong.
"Let's eat, how about a drink?" Katniss took off her apron and said to me, then went to the fridge to take out a bottle of red wine. I nodded. It was the last dinner, what could I refuse? But I felt a bit strange. After I came back with Simon, Katniss suddenly seemed like a different person. Apart from looking a bit pale and tired, she appeared relaxed, as if all her worries had disappeared. Strange, too strange.
At that moment, I couldn't help but have some doubts as I looked at the food and wine on the table. Could Katniss have drugged the food? Was she planning to poison herself, me, and Simon together? Even though we were getting divorced, did she want us to die together? Such thoughts seemed unimaginable, but in this situation, it wasn't entirely impossible. The divorce had been a huge shock to Katniss, and with me taking Simon away forever, leaving her alone, I could only imagine the despair in her heart. In a state of despair, what crazy things couldn't someone do?
Although the likelihood of Katniss poisoning the food was very low, I remained cautious. If I felt even slightly uncomfortable, I would immediately call the police and an ambulance. In today's society, it was unlikely that Katniss could obtain a lethal poison, but I still kept my guard up.
Simon was enjoying his meal at the table, and Katniss gently served us food, but barely ate herself. She looked at me and Simon with endless tenderness and reluctance. I could sense Katniss trying hard to hold back her tears, not wanting to cry in front of the child.
"To cheers." When Katniss and I drank, there were no other words exchanged, just a single word. With a child present, Katniss and I couldn't discuss sensitive topics. Simon was already in kindergarten and had some understanding. If he noticed something, it could affect him for life.
"Simon, eat a little more. You might not see Mom for a long time, okay?" After we finished the wine, Katniss served Simon more food, her eyes filled with deep tenderness and sorrow. Her tears were uncontrollable.
"Why? Mom, why are you crying?" Seeing Katniss cry, Simon quickly put down his chopsticks and reached out to wipe her tears, his little face showing confusion and concern.
"It's nothing. Your dad is going to take you on a trip after dinner, for a very long time. Mom can't go because of work. When you're there, take care of yourself. You're already a little man, listen to your dad, okay?" Katniss let Simon wipe her tears, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't wipe away Katniss's tears. Katniss finally grabbed Simon's hand, overflowing with affection, and said indulgently. Seeing this scene, I turned my head away. In a place where Katniss and Simon couldn't see, I wiped the corners of my eyes with my hand. The impending separation had brought my feelings of reluctance and sadness to their peak.
"Mom, don't worry, I'll listen and be good. I'll come back soon." Simon said obediently.
"Good boy."
The meal ended, and although the food was delicious, I couldn't taste anything but bitterness. Neither Katniss nor I ate much; Simon finished most of the food. After dinner, Simon drank his juice heartily. Katniss, with teary eyes, looked at me as if trying to imprint my image in her mind. I couldn't bear Katniss's gaze and could only watch Simon drinking his juice carefree.
"Simon, let's go. We might miss the train." Seeing Simon almost done eating, I checked the time on my phone and stood up. As I said this, Katniss's body suddenly tensed, and she began to tremble. What had to happen would happen, no matter how long it took.
I was about to help Simon get dressed, but before I could, Katniss took the clothes from my hands and started dressing Simon. Watching Katniss struggle to dress Simon, her hands trembling, having to zip and button multiple times, I couldn't help but feel emotional. In this moment, I had to suppress my own emotions.
Normally, Katniss could dress Simon in half a minute, but this time it took a full five minutes. Her hands were shaking, and she seemed to want time to slow down, to spend an extra minute with us.
"Simon, give Mom a hug." After finally dressing Simon, Katniss knelt down, embracing Simon with infinite love and pain.
"Mom, don't worry, I'll come back soon." Simon, being young and playful, loved the idea of a trip and didn't realize the complexity of the adult world. It would take him a few more years to understand the special meaning behind this dinner.
"Hug me too," After hugging Simon, Katniss stood up, arms open, and rushed towards me, tears still streaming down her face. I didn't say anything, I put down the suitcase in my hand, and embraced Katniss. This time, our hug was tight, very tight. We hugged for a long time, and Katniss refused to let go. After about a minute, we finally separated. I didn't have the courage to look at Katniss again. With one hand holding the suitcase and the other holding Simon, I opened the door and left.
"Goodbye, Mom." As the door was about to close, Simon waved to Katniss in my arms. The door closed, and everything was now permanently separated. With my back to Katniss, one hand holding the suitcase and the other holding Simon, my tears couldn't be held back, streaming down my face. I couldn't remember the last time I had cried.
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