Chapter 187
After thinking for a while, I finally remembered that one of my good friends had this disease. After getting married, he and Katniss didn't have children for many years. Finally, the couple went to the hospital for a check-up. The result at that time was that there was no problem with the woman, but my male friend had an issue. He was diagnosed with varicocele, a common genitourinary disease in men and a major cause of male infertility. It is more common in young adults, with an incidence rate of 10%-15% in the normal male population, and 19%-41% in male infertility cases.
Varicocele is a condition caused by the dilation of the veins surrounding the spermatic cord and the pampiniform plexus, leading to impaired sperm production. It mostly occurs on the left side but can also affect both sides or just the right side. Traditional surgery involves a groin incision to ligate the internal spermatic veins at a high level and remove some of the dilated veins in the scrotum.
"Are you sure, doctor? How did I get this disease?" After these details flashed through my mind, I still asked for the reasons, even though I knew what the disease was, I was unclear about the cause.
"I am a professional doctor, I couldn't have made a mistake. It is indeed varicocele. As for the causes, there are many, but they usually stem from unhealthy habits in men's daily lives, such as prolonged standing, sitting, high levels of stress, and excessive vigorous exercise, which can lead to damage in the male reproductive organs, causing varicocele." The doctor professionally replied, listing habits that I mostly had.
"Does this mean I am infertile now?" I asked the most concerning question, feeling a bit hesitant. I didn't know why, but I was afraid to think about this possibility at that moment.
"Having varicocele doesn't necessarily mean you are infertile, but there is a high possibility. My advice is, since you already have children, there's no need for treatment now. It won't have any other effects besides fertility. If you experience pain in the future, then you can consider surgery. If you don't have financial constraints, you can undergo a semen analysis to determine if you are infertile."
The doctor, perhaps accustomed to seeing this disease, showed no surprise or discrimination. After listening to the doctor, I fell silent. Should I get the semen analysis done? Out of certain worries, I decided to go through with it. Otherwise, I would live in doubt forever.
"Let's go ahead with it, money is not an issue." After thinking for a while, I decided to understand my body in detail. If I was truly infertile, I would need to find many answers and confirm many things.
"Alright, I'll prepare the testing kit for you." The doctor took my medical card and entered my information into the system.
Soon, a nurse handed me a container for semen collection and asked me to follow her to the collection room. On the way, my mind wandered, recalling rumors I had heard about the process. I used to dismiss them as impossible, but now, following the nurse, I couldn't help but wonder.
"Go in, and call me at the nurse's station when you're done." After leading me to the collection room, the nurse handed me a glove, gave some instructions, and left. It turned out she was just a guide.
Inside the collection room, I noticed many provocative images on the walls, a sink for washing hands, and not much else, a small space. After undressing, I began the process.
Normally, abstinence is required before collection, and I had abstained for a long time. Due to Nathan's condition, I hadn't been intimate with Katniss for a while, almost forgetting desire. Looking at the images on the wall, I started the process with a sterile glove. However, perhaps the images were too conservative, as I struggled to ejaculate even after a long time.
Checking the time, it had been about 8 minutes. Previously, I would finish in about 5 minutes, but maybe I was too anxious. At that moment, I made a bold attempt. Since Nathan and Katniss had ended their relationship, I hadn't fantasized about them being intimate. The last night on the deserted island had left me deeply scarred and fearful, especially the image of Katniss in a wedding dress being intimate with Nathan, a memory I couldn't bear. Now, after all this time, maybe the aversion had faded.
I decided to try, and the images of Nathan and Katniss being intimate started replaying in my mind. From their first encounter, I recalled their moments of intimacy while stimulating myself. Strangely, I found it exhilarating, and my penis felt tingly and sensitive. In less than a minute, I ejaculated a lot. Looking at the semen in the container, I couldn't help but smile wryly. I had thought I had overcome those desires, but they still brought intense stimulation. However, Nathan had lost his sexual function, everything had come to an end.
I looked at the semen in the container. Its color, viscosity, and consistency were no different from normal semen, although definitely different from Nathan's. Nathan could no longer produce semen; his testicles had been completely removed.
"Will there be any issues?" I asked softly, looking at my semen, as if questioning the semen, myself, Simon, and Olivia.
After semen collection, prompt testing was necessary to avoid affecting the quality. I removed the glove, covered the container, and quickly handed it to the nurse. The male nurse in the andrology department was already accustomed to this and took the sample for testing, while I felt a bit embarrassed.
Modern medical equipment was advanced. I waited at the machine for the results. Half an hour later, I swiped my medical card on the machine, and my semen analysis report was printed. I took the report back to the doctor's office, handed it over, and anxiously awaited the verdict. Although it was just a semen analysis, my nervousness at that moment was comparable to waiting for Nathan's cancer test results.
"Your semen does have issues. The sperm viability is low, the quantity is insufficient for fertilization." The doctor sympathetically glanced at me before delivering the news I least wanted to hear. Upon hearing those words, my hands clenched tightly, and my body began to tremble.
"How long have I had this disease? Can you tell?" My voice was hoarse at that moment. If I had contracted the disease within the last three years, it would be fine. If it was four years ago, Olivia wouldn't be my biological daughter. If it was ten years ago, neither Simon nor Olivia would be my biological children. I couldn't bear to think further.
"Don't worry, it's impossible to determine exactly when you contracted the disease. It could have been within the past year or much longer. So, don't stress about it, and don't let your mind wander." Seeing my distress, the doctor understood my concerns. After all, I had mentioned having a son and a daughter, and he must have considered the implications.
"If you have any doubts, you can ignore what I'm about to say. It's just a suggestion. Don't get upset, although it might not be the best time. If you're unsure, you can consider a paternity test. It will give you peace of mind. Suppressing these thoughts isn't good for your health or the situation. This is just my advice, especially for patients with infertility who already have children." The doctor cautiously advised, knowing that male patients with this disease usually had unstable emotions. If the patient became too agitated, the doctor might refrain from suggesting this.
"Thank you, doctor. Do I need treatment?" I took a deep breath and asked the doctor.
"If you still want children, treatment is an option. It's a minor surgery with minimal cost and impact. If you don't plan on having more children, treatment isn't necessary, and it won't affect your sexual life." The doctor handed me the test results.
"Thank you, doctor. If I decide on treatment, I'll come directly to your office."
Leaving the hospital with the test report in hand, fear consumed me. When did I contract this disease? Were Simon and Olivia my biological children? I wasn't too worried about Simon, as everyone had always said he looked very much like me at birth. But Olivia, being younger and resembling Katniss, made it hard to determine from appearances alone.
Upon returning home, I lay on the bed, watching Katniss help Olivia with her homework and then teach her to dance. Katniss was a professional dancer, and Olivia was lucky to have her as a dance teacher.
Lying on the bed, unable to focus on my phone, my mind was in turmoil. Although the chances of Simon and Olivia not being my biological children were extremely low, I couldn't shake off the worry. Since the last night on the deserted island, I had been monitoring Nathan and Katniss constantly to ensure they didn't rekindle their relationship. But over five years, in over 1800 days and nights, I couldn't have been vigilant every moment. Had I missed something?
It was very likely.
Listening to the music and Olivia's laughter as Katniss taught her to dance in the living room, I was torn. What should I do? Should I secretly undergo a paternity test without telling Katniss and everyone else? If Simon and Olivia were indeed my biological children, it would all be a false alarm. But what if they weren't? How should I proceed?
Could I handle the truth? Should I continue living in ignorance or muster the courage to seek the truth and face the consequences?
Log in with Google Account
Chapters
Favorite
Settings
