Chapter 83: Desolation
I tried to control my thoughts and regulate my breathing to appear as if I were sound asleep. However, as time passed, the only sounds were the clattering of dishes in the kitchen by Katniss and the sound of sweeping, with nothing else out of the ordinary. I couldn't help but feel disappointed.
Since I was focused on listening to the kitchen, I hadn't noticed Nathan beside me. When I realized that Katniss in the kitchen was not doing anything unusual, I shifted my attention to Nathan. I noticed that Nathan was not sleeping peacefully, as his breathing was uneven - sometimes rapid, sometimes steady, and he would occasionally let out a soft sigh. It was clear that Nathan was not asleep at all at this moment, and his inner turmoil was evident. Throughout the night, Nathan had received many messages from Katniss.
Due to drinking a lot of alcohol, waves of drowsiness hit my brain. Although I had experienced this before, I initially tried to resist, but eventually succumbed to sleep without realizing it, missing out on many exciting moments between Nathan and Katniss. This time, I was determined to resist. My hand naturally rested beside my thigh, and whenever I couldn't resist the drowsiness, I would discreetly pinch my thigh with my fingernails. As we all know, the inside of the thigh is very sensitive, and a light pinch can be quite painful, helping me stay awake for a long time.
After some time had passed, and I had pinched my thigh several times, causing it to become very painful, Nathan finally got up. He got up cautiously, and I heard the sound of him putting on shoes. Since Nathan and I were both drunk, Katniss, being a woman, couldn't undress both of us, so we lay on the bed fully clothed. Due to the limited space in the bedroom, there was only Nathan and me on the bed, while Katniss was prepared to spend the night on a folding lounge chair in the kitchen.
Nathan probably got up to use the bathroom. I couldn't help but wonder, but there was still a glimmer of hope in my heart. There was no indoor bathroom on the island, just a simple outhouse by the river. Nathan's footsteps headed towards the kitchen because the main door of the house was there, leading directly outside. Nathan's steps were slow, and as I closed my eyes to listen carefully, when he reached the kitchen, his footsteps suddenly stopped. At that moment, Katniss should have been lying on the folding lounge chair, and Nathan must have seen her.
Time seemed to stand still. Just when I thought something was about to happen, Nathan's footsteps resumed, gradually moving towards the outside and fading away bit by bit. It turned out that Nathan had indeed gone outside to use the bathroom. Upon hearing this, I couldn't help but feel a bit disappointed and relieved at the same time. However, before I could completely relax, a crisp sound came from the kitchen, which made my heart skip a beat because it was the sound of the folding lounge chair.
I quickly calmed myself down, regulated my breathing, and steadied my inner turmoil. After the sound, there were footsteps of high heels tapping on the floor, which I recognized as Katniss. At this point, she must have gotten up from the lounge chair, hence the sound of her putting on shoes. What was Katniss planning to do?
As Nathan had not returned from the bathroom yet, Katniss's footsteps suddenly approached the bedroom, light and gentle. Finally, Katniss's footsteps stopped beside me. My heart raced with nervousness and curiosity - what was Katniss about to do?
Suddenly, I caught a whiff of a unique fragrance, unmistakably Katniss's, and it seemed like a few strands of her hair brushed against my face ever so lightly. Could it be that Katniss wanted to check if I was asleep? She gently moved my head with her hand, and I pretended to be asleep, making sure not to give myself away. Sensing that I was truly asleep, Katniss let out a soft sigh. Then, with light footsteps, she walked away, the sound gradually fading into the night.
Was Katniss going to find Nathan? Were the two of them planning some kind of rendezvous on Serenity Bay Isle? Was their second chance coming so soon? I couldn't imagine, and I didn't want to miss any exciting moments. After all, there were no surveillance cameras on Serenity Bay Isle, so if something happened between Katniss and Nathan, I wouldn't know afterwards.
Time was running out, driven by curiosity, I took a risk and quietly got up to put on my shoes. My steps were light as a feather, but my pace was quick as I cautiously headed towards the direction of the bathroom. The island was dense with bushes and trees, making it easy to find a hiding spot. I saw Katniss's figure ahead, and like a thief, I followed her, my steps a bit unsteady due to the alcohol, requiring great effort to control my pace.
The bathroom was about 50 meters away from the house, located by the water where the river could wash away waste, and the distance helped prevent any odors from reaching the house. The path to the bathroom was winding, with the house situated slightly higher than the bathroom, creating a meandering path between them. This arrangement made it easier for me to hide without being noticed.
Soon, I also spotted Nathan in my line of sight, returning from the bathroom. Katniss was standing in the middle of the path, waiting for Nathan. When Nathan saw Katniss standing in the middle of the path, he suddenly stopped in his tracks, staring at her blankly, seeming a bit flustered, unsure why Katniss was standing in the middle of the path.
At that moment, Katniss, dressed in white like a ghostly figure, startled anyone who suddenly saw her at night. I hid not far from Nathan and Katniss, concealed in the bushes. The wind was blowing directly towards me, carrying the voices of Nathan and Katniss clearly into my ears.
A light laughter rang out as Katniss saw Nathan startled by her sudden appearance, and seeing Nathan's dumbfounded expression, Katniss couldn't help but burst into laughter. Recognizing Katniss, Nathan awkwardly smiled and slowly approached her.
"Going out alone at night, aren't you afraid? Why didn't you wake Kevin up to accompany you?" Nathan, walking up to Katniss, seemed at a loss for words, assuming Katniss was also going to the bathroom, so he inquired with concern.
"He's sound asleep. I came to find you," Katniss stopped her light laughter and gently said to Nathan. Her words were tender, lacking the previous coldness. Upon hearing that Katniss had come to find him, Nathan was taken aback. I discreetly peeked out from the bushes, and with the night light reflecting off the river, I could vaguely see Nathan's expression.
"Dad, come back home." Since Katniss had her back to me, I couldn't see her expression clearly. However, when Nathan heard Katniss's words, his face lit up with joy. Yet, he remained silent, seemingly waiting for Katniss to continue.
"You're getting older, and living on Serenity Bay Isle is not suitable for long-term living. What happened between us has already occurred, and I don't want to bring it up again. As long as you go back, I won't hold onto those things anymore. Let's pretend that it never happened. After all, the responsibility doesn't solely lie with you. If it weren't for me, it wouldn't have happened. I will continue to take care of you with Kevin , responsible for your retirement life. You are still my father, and I am still your daughter-in-law," Katniss looked at Nathan, who remained silent, and began to express her inner thoughts gently.
"I hope we can treat everything that happened between us as a dream. From the beginning, we both made mistakes. In truth, I have always been uneasy in my heart, but it's too late to change anything. However, I hope our affair will never be known by a third party, as if it never happened. We will continue as a family, just like before. Come back, Dad."
By this point, I understood Katniss's intentions. After all, Katniss was a kind-hearted woman who had always been filial to Nathan. After this period of adjustment and seeing Nathan's life on the island, she still couldn't suppress her compassion. She wanted Nathan to return home to enjoy his retirement, indirectly avoiding any further intimacy with him. In the future, she would take care of Nathan with me, but there would be no more intimate contact between them. Everything that happened was to be treated as a dream, as unreal. Katniss had forgiven Nathan, but she also didn't want anything more to happen between them, completely cutting off their illicit relationship.
Upon hearing Katniss's words, a hint of pain flashed across Nathan's face, as if he, a man, had suddenly been abandoned by his beloved woman. At this moment, Nathan may have found some comfort, but more so, he felt the pain. After all, Katniss's intentions were clear - their ambiguous relationship was in the past, and there would be no more in the future. Nathan's face also showed a sense of relief, as this might have been the best outcome, perhaps even the inevitable one, predetermined from the moment he pinned Katniss against the wall.
"I'd better not go back. I haven't explained that incident to you, but that night, I really couldn't control myself. I've been blaming myself ever since. I'm glad you could persuade me to go back. I admit, part of the reason I came to Serenity Bay Isle was to escape, but more so for the sake of our family. Being alone on Serenity Bay Isle helps me forget my troubles. Life here is carefree, and I'm content. When I'm not at home, as long as I don't see you, I can forget many things and worries. If I return home, I can't guarantee that I won't do something else. Every time I see you, I can't suppress my growing desires," Nathan pondered for a moment after hearing Katniss's words, then simply and subtly expressed his decision. Not seeing Katniss would reduce his longing for her, allowing him to better control his emotions. It was a form of rejection, but also a kind of confession.
"Dad, I understand your feelings. In this life, I can only be your daughter-in-law. I love Kevin , and his place in my heart is unshakable. If there is another life." After hearing Nathan's words, Katniss's voice trembled with tears. How could she not understand Nathan's subtle confession? However, Katniss couldn't accept this kind of confession from Nathan. Her heart must have been in turmoil, but she had to firmly reject Nathan to prevent them from continuing down the wrong path. Although her rejection at this moment felt like closing the barn door after the horse had bolted.
"Dad, whenever you want to come back home, I welcome you. Kevin might wake up at any moment. Let's go back quickly." After finishing her words, Katniss abruptly turned around. It seemed she didn't want to continue communicating with Nathan, as she couldn't control her emotions. I could clearly see her discreetly wiping away tears, lowering her head and slowly walking away, with Nathan watching her back, his emotions lingering for a long time.
Seeing that Nathan and Katniss were ready to return to the house, I quickly made my way back to the house ahead of them, taking advantage of the night and the cover of the bushes. I took off my shoes, quietly lay down on the bed, maintaining the same posture without moving. I was touched by Katniss's rejection of Nathan, as my position in Katniss's heart had always been the first, but I couldn't help feeling a bit disappointed. Was this the end of everything?
Katniss's high heels first entered the kitchen, followed by the sound of the lounge chair. Soon, Nathan also returned to the bedroom and lay down on the bed. Both of their emotions seemed unstable. Nathan appeared to be in great pain, even though he had already guessed the outcome. However, when Katniss truly faced him and spoke out, he couldn't suppress the pain in his heart. Katniss had ruthlessly rejected Nathan, and although she was also deeply reluctant, the pleasure Nathan had brought her was something I couldn't provide. Through various past events, Nathan had successfully entered her heart, albeit occupying only a small part. But in the end, Katniss made a clear choice between me and Nathan, with no turning back. Yet, the reluctance in Katniss's heart was something only she truly understood.
Everything fell into a calm state, but the sobs of Nathan and Katniss could still be heard from time to time, echoing in the desolate night.