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Bavanda's heart did a very scary flip in her chest. He was too close, not that she was uncomfortable, but it was really difficult to think straight when she was this close to the one man who made her come undone in several different ways.

“Why? What do you mean why?" She mumbled, swallowing down the lump in her throat.

Loco's eyes glistened brightly under the moonlight. “I want to know why you said no. Why you turned me down when I bared my heart out to you. I want to know the reason, Bavanda. The real reason.”

She hesitated, biting her lips like it was some candy cone and not flesh. "Loco…"

He cut her short. “No, Bavanda. I need answers. Please." He reached for her shoulders, gripping it without force. “Everyday, I think about that night. We won the war, we've finally found peace but not for me. I know you love me just as much as I love you, then why? I just need to know the reason. I'll go insane if I don't because the images in my head aren't pretty.”

Their eyes were locked for what felt like eternity but was barely a minute. Loco blinked, and the next minute, he felt her lips on his.

Bavanda did not think once about that move. She tried to arrange the words she wanted to say in her head, and when all of them sounded miserably ridiculous, she panicked. Kissing him was the only thing she could think about. Plus, his lips had been enticing her the entire time, she just couldn't resist it any longer.

Loco was shaken for a minute. His eyes were wide open, yet he hadn't seen that coming.

“Bavanda…" he tried to speak but she cut him short.

"Shhh! Just kiss me back. Please, Loco."

He did. His lips parted, his tongue setting into her already open lips. His hands slipped from her shoulders to her waist, pulling her to himself subconsciously. Bavanda's palm found his chest, she inhaled sharply on coming in contact with his hard sculpted body.

They remained like this for a while, intertwined in each other's arms under the shining moonlight. Two werewolves in love, yet held back by so many things, both those they couldn't see, and those they could.

Then, as if he had just come to his senses, Loco broke the kiss. He didn't let go of her waist, or back away from her.

His eyes were glowing, but underneath it was a subtle pain he tried to hide. “Kissing me like that won't change anything, Bavanda. I know it's stupid that I'm insisting, but…but I really want to know.”

Their eyes locked again, the atmosphere around them instantly charging up. She pulled away, shutting her eyes and inhaling deeply.

"It's not stupid.” She mumbled, after letting the inhaled breath out.

He retracted his hand, fighting the urge to reach for her and pull her back into his arms. "Then, tell me.”

Bavanda exhaled again. “Fine!" Another exhale. “It's really stupid, you know. My reason."

He chuckled despite himself. “Let me be the judge of that."

She bit her lips, interlocking her fingers together as she fidgeted. “I… I just thought… ‘he’s not my mate’.” She looked at Loco to see his reaction. "That's why I said no…because my mind decided to play me dirty and reminded me at that moment where you were down on one knee, at that moment where it was supposed to be my dream come true.”

Loco's expression was calm, like peaceful waters. He said nothing, so she continued.

This time, she looked away from him. “I've heard the story of my parents a million times," she chuckled lightly. “How Mother chose a mate for herself, and how he found his true mate and neglected her. How she lost her life because of it once, was reborn, and he lost his life instead. How she met Father and everything was suddenly right again.” She paused, biting her lips again. "I was just scared, Loco.”

"Bavanda…”

The way he said her name unnerved her. She was trying so hard to keep tears from falling off her eyes, but somehow, hearing her name from his lips made her efforts useless.

She sniffed. "Loco, I love you too much to want this to be wrong. I don't know if you get it, but I was so scared at that moment . I couldn't think of anything else but my parents' love story, what if it reoccurred? What if I eventually find my true mate and he's…” she stopped herself just in time.

She still couldn't get herself to look at him, so she focused on her fingers, noticing for the first time, how thin they actually were.

“Wow!" Loco's voice broke through the silence. It was deep, too deep, it almost didn't sound like his. It sounded like he was trying to conceal the heaviness in his heart underneath the heaviness of his voice.

“I'm sorry, Bavanda. I never really thought about it that far.” he said again.

“No. I'm the one who's sorry. I let such a little thing stop me from saying yes when I should have. I let it hurt you."

Loco swallowed. “It's not little. You have every right to feel that way."

Silence stretched between the two, a painful silence that was pregnant with so many words unsaid. Loco's expression was grave, he had his eyes fixed on the dirt below, not blinking. Bavanda wouldn't stop biting on her lips. She kept glancing at him time to time, feeling utterly uncomfortable with the silence and how much it hurt.

“Now what?" She mumured after a period of waiting that felt like eternity, her eyes watering up again.

“Now what?" Loco repeated

She blinked hard, trying her best to keep the tears in. “Now that… now you know, what next?” Despite her efforts, her voice broke off at the end.

Loco looked at her, finally. His eyes were dark, yet filled with so many emotions. "Don't cry, Bavanda.”

She broke down. "I can't help it.” She sobbed. "I can't help it, Loco. Now I'm even more scared. I shouldn't have said that, I shouldn't have told you. Now you know what's going on in my head, you wouldn't want to be with me anymore. Your love will fade. You will set out to find your true mate cause that's what matters.”

Loco reached out and pulled her into his arms. It was something he had wanted to do the entire time. “Stop crying, Bavanda." He repeated, stroking her hair as he held her close.

“I'm sorry, but I love you too much to let you go, Loco. I did it once, I can't a second time. I can't survive without you."

"Shh! I never said you'll have to live without me, Bavanda.” Loco said, his breath warm against her skin.

Bavanda sniffed. "You say that now, but what happens when you find her? Your true mate.”

“I'll say the same thing, Bavanda."

He pulled away from her ever so slightly, but his hands remained around her. His eyes met hers and he held her gaze. “You'll never have to let me go, and I'll never let you go either. The sooner you realize that, the better for you.”

"Loco…"

“Don't say anything to counter that, love. You're not in my heart, you don't know how I feel about you. I wish you could though. Does the fact that we are not the moon goddess’ chosen mates nullify the love I have deep-rooted in my heart for you? No, right?”

He heaved, pulling away from Bavanda. He looked away too, at the starlit sky above. “I never believed in mates, you know."

"Really?”

He nodded. He picked a piece of stone beside him and tossed it on the dirt. “Where I came from… the dark world… mating was dreaded. You never know who, or what the moon would pair you with as a werewolf. I was so scared as a child.” He paused, repeating the cycle. "I still am,” his voice was lower, more pained.

"I'm so sorry, Loco.” Bavanda said, mirroring his actions. She didn't know what else to say.

"Nahh. It's okay. I don't know about you, Bavanda. But I'll choose what we have to any mate bond. You're my mate, the moon goddess will have to agree to that.”

She felt the corner of her lips twitching into a smile. She tried to resist it, but it overpowered her. She swallowed, looking up to the sky.

“Well, what if she doesn't?”

He didn't respond for a while, picked up another stone and held unto this one for a while. “She will. She has to."

Bavanda picked a stone too. "Loco!” She called quietly.

He tossed the stone. "Yeah!”

"I'm sorry I hurt you.”

He nodded. "Only you can heal me too.” He looked at her.

She tossed her stone too. “Loco, one more thing.”

"Yes.”

She met his eyes, hers glowing under the moonlight. "I love you.”

He smiled, the hurt in his eyes slowly dissipating like the wind. He slipped his hand through her waist. "I know.”

"Kiss me.”

He did.