Talking With Leah

On the last stop before we got to the hotel, Caleb and I gave Will a sleeping pill to ensure that he would be asleep by the time we got there. When we arrived, Arlo handed us a key, nodding his head in acknowledgment.

“Did everything go okay?” He asked.

“As well as we could hope for,” I mumbled angrily, glaring at my brother, who was very conveniently lost in the landscape painting hanging in the lobby. “I wish he had fought back harder. I wanted to pound his face in.”

“I know. How is Phoenix handling all of this?”

“Umm, she doesn’t know, and when I bring her back to the hotel tonight, you can’t tell her. She is already anxious about tomorrow. If she knew that he was anywhere near her, she would really be anxious,” I answered his question.

“You should tell her, Brennan,” he told me. “She has a thing about people telling her what to do.”

I narrowed my eyes on him as I thought about what he said. I knew he was right, but that didn’t mean I liked it.

“I’ll think about it. Anyway, thank you. I’ll be back for the other key after we get Will into the room.”

“Alright. I’ll get a room ready for you.”

“Thanks.”

Caleb and I walked back outside, where I followed the car around the building to the back entrance next to the room Arlo reserved for us. After we got Will inside, lying in a crumpled heap on the floor, I eyed my brother and Rhino.

“Do you have him so I can go get Leah?”

“Yep. Tell her I said hi and that we’ll see her tomorrow.”

“I will.” I paused at the door as they started to get themselves situated for the night. “Thank you for today. It really means a lot to me that you care enough about Leah to want to help her.”

“Well, that’s different. It’s our pleasure, Brennan. No one should be treated like he treated her.”

I nodded before walking out of the room to go back to the office to get the other key. Once it was in my pocket, I started heading toward Joey’s house. When I arrived, I immediately relaxed when I saw Leah pacing on the front porch while her bag lay next to the stairs. Before I could even put it in park, she bounded down the stairs, dashing over to the car where she bounced in place until I got out. My arms instantly went around her waist, pulling her in close to my body as I buried my face in her neck.

“Leah,” I whispered.

“I’m glad you’re home, Brennan. I missed you.”

I pressed a kiss to her neck. “And I love you.”

She leaned back to smile up at me. “You are so silly, Brennan. I love you too.”

“Are you guys going to leave right away, or can I steal him away for a moment?” Joey chuckled from the porch, where he was now leaning against the post.

I gripped Leah’s chin, tilting her face so I could peck her lips. “I’ll be right back, my love.”

“Don’t take too long!”

I let my eyes move down her body before slowly coming back up to meet hers. “I promise I won’t take too long right now, but later, all bets are off.”

As she swallowed hard, I let her go to walk up to Joey, who tilted his head to the other side of the porch. I followed him to the far side of it before turning to face him so Leah couldn’t see either of our faces.

“How’d it go?” He asked quietly.

“He’s knocked out in the hotel room.”

“Good. And he’s all in one piece?” He continued.

“Sadly…”

He narrowed his eyes on me. “What did you do?”

“Nothing,” I grumbled. “I might have shocked him a little harder than I should have.”

He groaned. “Brennan!”

“I’m not sorry, Joey. He hurt Leah. If it had been Maddie…”

His eyes softened as he thought about Madison. “He’d already be dead. Good job, brother,” he told me as he patted me on the shoulder.

“Thank you. Now, is there anything else you want to know, or I can go spend time with my future wife?” I asked.

“No. Go on. I’ll see you in the morning. Leah already asked Maddie to watch Sugar tonight. Enjoy your night, and tomorrow our celebratory dinner is on me,” he said.

“Great. I’ll research the most expensive restaurant in the area,” I joked as I went down the stairs, barely pausing long enough to grab Leah’s bag. I beamed at her as I approached the car. “Are you ready?”

“I was born ready!”

“That’s my woman! Let’s go!”

She hopped into the car, pulling the belt across her so fast I chuckled as I deposited her bag in the backseat. I thought I had been excited, but my anticipation was nothing compared to hers. I stopped at a Pizza Hut to get us a pepperoni and extra cheese pizza. We went to the pharmacy next door to the pizza joint to grab drinks and little snacks for Leah for the night. At the counter I saw little stuffed animals that made Leah smile, and seeing her smile so freely was enough to make me buy every single one of them just to keep her happy. By the time we got back to the Pizza Hut, our pizza was done, which made me happy. I was ready to have her all alone in our own private room. Once we got back in the car, I took her hand, gently squeezing her fingers.

“Baby, I need to ask you something,” I said.

“Okay. Go ahead.”

“If there was a way you could punish Will for what he’s done to you, would you take it?” I asked. When she remained silent, I glanced at her. I could see the conflicting emotions passing over her face, and I immediately started to get worried. I squeezed her fingers again. “Baby? Talk to me. What’s going through your head?”

“I really don’t know, Brennan. I want to, but I also think that if I were to punish him, it would make me no better than he is. I want to hit him. I want to scream and yell at him. I want to make him feel as low as he made me feel, but I don’t want to hate myself,” she told me.

“Why would you hate yourself?”

“Because I’m not a violent person. And if I were to act out of character, then he wins. He’s still in control. I don’t want him to be in control of me anymore. I want to be in control of myself. I want to say, ‘This is who I choose to be, and I love me.’ I can’t say that if I lash out at him.” She shifted in her seat to lay her head on my shoulder. “Besides, Brennan, he’s not worth my time. He’s not worth keeping myself living in fear. I want to look to the future, not the past. I want to sign the papers and be free. That’s what I want the most.” She put my hand on her stomach. “I want to be able to honestly tell our child that their mama is a fighter, but she fought the right way.”

It was my turn to remain silent. I didn’t know what to say to her. A lot of people would have jumped at the chance to get back at their abusers, but not my woman. Not my Phoenix. She really had recreated herself from the ground up. I brought our joined hands to my mouth, kissing the back of her hand before putting it back on the gear shift.

“I understand that, baby. I want you to know how proud I am of how far you’ve come. I’m proud to say that you are my woman. I’m proud to say that you are incredibly strong, and you are the most deserving woman I know,” I told her.

“And that is why I have you, because you are what I deserve.”

I kissed the back of her hand again as I turned into the parking lot. There wasn’t anything else I could do to express how much she meant to me. I was so overwhelmed with emotions at that moment that I knew whatever I said wouldn’t even come close to how I felt about her. When I finally turned toward her, she was smiling softly as she watched my face. I tucked a stray hair behind her ear before leaning toward her to put my forehead against hers.

“You are more than everything to me, Leah. You are more than eternity. I have more love for you than there are stars in the sky. I wish I could recite poetry for you or sing you endless love ballads. I wish that just holding you was enough to express how much I love you, but even if I never let you go, it would never be able to tell you just how much I do.”

Her smile widened as she ran her fingers through my hair. “I don’t need poetry or sappy love songs, Brennan. All I have wanted was for you to be present with me. For you to tell me that you love me. Those three words, believe it or not, are enough to let me know exactly how you feel.”

I undid her seatbelt before carefully pulling her across the car into my lap. I met her eyes as I wrapped my arms around her waist.

“I love you, Leah. I love you. I love you. And I love you some more.”

She giggled a little as she ran her fingers through my hair. “I love you too, Brennan.”