A Big Sister's Job is Never Done

I kept my eyes glued to the road ahead of me. I was so ready to get there and I was even more ready to leave. Darcy had spent the entire 6 ½ hour drive here, flirting and trying to touch me. I was past the point of wanting to throw her out of the car. That happened 6 hours and 18 minutes ago. The only thing that kept me going was that I got to go home to my girlfriend without Darcy. I had no doubt that she wasn’t going back to Eden with me. Not only had I already talked to Caleb about sending her back to Will, but I arranged a way back. She definitely was not the kind of person that I helped there. And when it came to Leah, nothing and no one else mattered. Her safety and mental wellbeing were the only things that mattered to me.
“R. H. M., where are we going?” She asked, pouting, making me have to fight back the urge to drop her off on the side of the road again.
I drew in a deep breath, already having decided to play along. I needed her to be open and willing to “therapy.” The deeper Patterson was able to sink her, the more honesty we would get from her. I smiled at her.
“Well, we are going to see my brothers and my sister. They’re therapists. Every member of Eden has to undergo this process to stay in the community. It is a safety issue. I need to be aware of whatever trigger or other needs you might have so I can make sure that Eden is meeting them while avoiding triggers,” I told her softly.
“So, I get to meet your family,” she said smugly.
“Mhmm. Not a lot of people get to meet them, but if there’s a need, I ask for their help.”
“And you feel like you need help with me?” She hissed, frowning.
“No. I just wanted to take you away from Eden for a little bit.”
I hated how that sounded. I knew she read too much into it, but if it helped to understand the risk she posed to Leah, then I would let her assume. It wasn’t like I said I wanted her. I was just kind of already wanting to be home so we needed to hurry up. I pressed down harder on the gas pedal, whipping around corners and down streets until I slammed to stop outside of Caleb’s office. I grimaced when all of my siblings, except Kayla, were already there. I turned to Darcy, not shocked in the least that she was undressing Caleb with her eyes. I rolled my eyes as I got out of the car. The girl definitely was not going home with me.
Ramira watched us closely as we walked up to them. Every time I took a step to the side, Darcy moved with me, keeping herself closer to my side than I wanted her to be. I nodded my head at them all as Patterson stepped out onto the wraparound porch. I nodded my head at him.
“Patterson.”
“R. H. M.”
I gestured to Darcy. “This is Darcy. I appreciate you guys for being willing to speak with her.”
“Not a problem. I already have a room set up for us,” Patterson told Darcy, smiling widely at her. “If you are ready, we can start.”
Darcy ignored him to look up at me. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to everyone?”
“After. We’ll have time to talk after.”
“Fine,” she huffed.
Once she disappeared inside the building, I let out an agitated breath. “God, she’s infuriating,” I mumbled. “So handsy and flirtatious.”
Caleb chuckled as he led us to his office, which had a one way mirror coupled with a speaker system so we could watch Darcy and Patterson. While Patterson began to put Darcy under. I glanced at Ramira as I sat down in my seat.
“Thank you for reaching out to him for me. All this mind stuff is your area of expertise not mine.” I shivered. “And hypnosis is crazy. I’m actually really surprised that you kept in touch with him after everything.”
She narrowed her eyes on me as Dale’s head whipped around so he could stare at her. “What does he mean after everything?”
“We dated in college. He slept with my roommate,” she said, shrugging. “It’s not a big deal. We were only intimate once. I went the real way with my education and he went the opposite. I help people, he manipulates them. But he’s good at what he does and besides, I’m not entirely convinced that it isn’t real. I’ve seen him do some amazing things.”
“Ramira–”
She put her hand on his arm before leaning toward him to peck his lips. “You have nothing to worry about. I promise.”
“I better not. I know the bikers and I am not above using them,” he threatened lightly.
She tossed her head back to laugh for a moment before turning back to me, instantly pinning me with an angry glare. “And what about you? How are things going in Eden?”
I immediately smiled as I thought about Leah, and before I could respond she narrowed her eyes on me.
“Well, spit it out.”
“I have a girlfriend,” I announced happily.
“What? Who?” Joey asked while Caleb’s eyes widened.
“Leah?”
“Mhmmm. I asked her this morning before I left,” I answered.
“You shouldn’t have done that, Brennan!” Ramira snapped, effectively making my smile fall.
“And why not? I want to be with her. What’s wrong with letting her know that I want to be with her?”
“Everything about how you’re going about this is wrong. Have you even started the exercises I assigned to you?” She snapped. “Have you told her that you’re in love with her?” When I didn’t respond, she threw her hands up in the air. “You are making this about her! I warned you about what would happen if you tried to heal for her! Both of you guys have a lot of work to do until you can be in a good relationship. Neither of you are ready to commit to someone else. Have you had sex with her?”
“Not sex, no.”
“But you’ve touched her?” Ramira almost yelled.
I crossed my arms over my chest as I glared at her. “So what if I have?!”
“God, Brennan! You are so stupid! Have you even talked to her? Do you know how William punished her? It was with sex. She is terrified of the act. She doesn’t enjoy it and it’s going to take more than a frenzied coupling with you to fix that!”
“She enjoys what we do!” I argued. “I know she does! She cums! She’s not afraid of doing things with me!”
“You have no fucking idea about anything. Why have me speak to her once a week for counseling if you are not going to listen to me when I say stuff? You are doing damage and you have no fucking idea! Rape victims ‘cum,’ Brennan. Do they enjoy it? Did they ask for it? No! It’s the same thing with Leah. The trauma she suffered at the hands of her parents and her husband is not something that you are going to be ‘fixed’ because you wish it so. It’s going to take time for her to work through everything. It’s her journey and not yours. And speaking of your journey, you aren’t even putting the work in. Again, you think that you’re okay because when you are around her, you’re blinded by her presence. You think you’re okay, but you’re not.”
She flipped her bag open to rummage around in it before tossing me a pill bottle. I caught it and read the label before looking back up at her.
“Depression medication? For who?” I asked.
“For you. For Leah! It doesn’t matter. One or both of you are going to need them when this little avoidable situation that you created blows up in your face.”
I jumped to my feet angrily. “It’s not going to blow up, Ramira. We are fine! We are happy!”
She stomped across the room to slap me. “Wake up, Brennan! You can’t even tell her that you love her. Eventually, I care about you is not going to be enough. Her whole life she has wanted to be loved and that is the very thing that she was never given. She’s not ready to be in a relationship because she truly cares about someone.” She held up her hand to silence me when I went to speak. “Now, I’m not saying that she doesn’t care about you, but you were the first person she met when she arrived at Eden, which is a safe place. Sometimes when people who have been traumatized in such a violent way, they latch onto the first person who helps them. I told you to go slow. You didn’t listen to me. And however this plays out, is on your shoulders, ‘R. H. M.’ You knew better. And as much as I love you, if this goes south, it won’t be you that’s hurt the most. If you really love her like you think you do, I would slow down. Take your time.”
“Are you saying that I should break up with her?” I snarled.
“No, Brennan. What I’m saying is that you might be destroying what could be because your dick got hard.”
She turned around, grabbed Dale’s hand, and began to walk out of the room. I knew she was pissed but so was I. She didn't know us. She didn’t know how strong our relationship was.
“She cares about me. I know she does. And it’s not because I was nice!”
She stopped at the door to glance at me sadly. “I hope so, Brennan. I really do, but I’m not taking your word for it. I know her better than you do, and as much progress as she has made, I know she has triple left to go. Wise up, brother, before this destroys you worse than Diadra did.”
Seconds later, she was gone, leaving me fuming on the couch with my arms crossed over my chest while Caleb and Joey eyed me wearily.
“Fuck her,” I grumbled. “She doesn’t know shit.”