CHAPTER590
“I obviously love you, it’s only reason I still put up with you.” I retort cheekily and Arrick slaps my butt, making me jump before slapping him back softly in the peck in reaction.
“Love me enough to become a Carrero… Guess that says it all.” The way he says it hints at the stress he is having with his father right now and I sink down to prop my chin on my hand on top of his chest. It wasn’t a funny remark but more of a hint at sarcasm or veiled upset.
“What’s wrong with being a Carrero?” I scrunch up my nose at him and watch those hazy brown eyes cloud to greener, that sexy jawline tenses a little and I know he has been shielding me from the extent of the fight with his father. Arry and Giovanni have always been really close, any trouble between those two is major and his bottling it up is not a good sign.
“Sometimes it sucks.” He moves me off to the side and turns so he can face me instead, laying on the bed together, a hair breath apart. He’s closing off emotionally and Mr. Cool. persona is taking over. Arry is upset, stressed and over-thinking. I know better than to be phased over this act anymore; he is his most cool and unaffected when he’s at his most emotionally distraught. Well except from when it comes to me. Arrick loses all his shit when it involves me.
“Talk to me… it’s not fair if it only works one way.” I nudge him in the stomach and that at least gets a smile. He picks up my hand and pulls it to his face, rubbing my fingertips gently over his smooth jaw. Still a lover of a close shave. I watch him with concern and adoration.
“My dad won’t take my calls and won’t respond to any messages. He’s sulking. Jake’s in the middle and he agrees with my dad that this is a dumb decision.” He looks pissed, agitated.
“It is a dumb decision.” I point out then frown apologetically when he narrows his eyes on me.
“Putting us first isn’t dumb, Sophie. How many times have I chosen to listen to logic over my heart? How many times have I screwed up where you’re concerned and hurt you in the process? I’m not doing it anymore.” He tenses his jaw, little muscles flexing along the length of it and under his cheek bones, his tone serious and raspy and I sigh at him. He’s in the ‘no argument on my decision’ frame of mind.
“This is different. This isn’t like that.”
“It’s exactly like that… I swore to you that coming here would be easy. That I wouldn’t keep leaving you to fend for yourself. I failed. I broke not one, but two promises to you, and in the process, it made you feel insecure enough to believe I would cheat on you, Sophs. If you were secure, then you wouldn’t have reacted like you did. That’s on me… That’s on how much I am fucking this up.” He pulls me closer, so we are touching in every way possible and sharing air, so close we are practically kissing. “I would die without you. It scared me … To see how easily I could destroy you. How something I do can hurt the one person I love more than life in the worst kind of way. I was neglecting you and hurting my baby. It’s left me a lot to think about, it’s made me rethink this whole situation.” Arry is serious, emanating anxiety and stress and I run my fingers across his mouth to soothe him; my heart tugging at how affected he is by this. I hadn’t given what happened in New York another thought after he proposed to me in Central Park. If he was trying to make me forget it and feel better, then he pulled it off magnificently. He has no reason to feel this way. I believe him, and I trust him, I know he hasn’t cheated on me.
“I was being stupid, even I knew deep down you would never. I was tired and emotional and feeling low. Stop doing this to yourself. Stop over-thinking the importance of one shitty event.”
“It’s not one shitty event, it’s a year of shitty days and letting you down. I’ve thought about it, like you asked me to and yet I don’t feel any different. Carrero Corp is taking over everything and if I keep letting it, then I won’t have you to come home to at the end of the day. It’s that simple to me.”
I inhale heavily, and this time take his face in both my hands and pull his nose to mine. Stern toned and stubborn kicking in. Sometimes he is his own worst enemy.
“Listen to me for once in your life. How many times have you disregarded what I am saying to you and gone with a decision anyway? You’re doing it now! I’m telling you that this is not what I want you to do… it’s not what I need.”
“Sophie…” He tries to cut me off.
“Don’t! You are notoriously bad for coming to some stubborn decision in here.” I tap his temple to emphasize my point and then go back to cradling that perfect face. “You don’t listen to me; you go with what you think is best for me and forget that maybe I get to have a say in what’s best for me too. I love that you’re putting us first and doing this for us, but I’m telling you it’s the wrong choice to make. They are your family; they are my family too.”
Arrick sighs, frustrated with my resistance to get on the same page as him and t frowns at me.
“I know what I’m doing.” Tight lipped and stubborn toned. I’m losing the battle here.
“You’re hurting your relationship with your dad to save one with me… When it’s not even needed.”
This is futile and even I know it.
“You got to let me ride this one out, Sophs, trust me that it’s for the best for us right now. My dad will come around. He won’t freeze me out forever over something like this. Jake won’t either. It’s going to settle down and we are going to be fine.” He has that focused look, that defiant squared jaw on.
I don’t know what else to say, he’s pig headed and stubborn sometimes and even I know when those Carrero blinkers go on then the only way they are going to come off is when his own brain realizes his decision is dumb. I don’t want to fight; I want to love the fact that we got engaged and we’re here to break out of this infernal city to go back to a happier life.
“We are not done with this, but I’m going to respect that you think this is right for the time being and go with it.” I kiss him softly again and this time he holds onto my face and kisses me a little more passionately.
“I appreciate that. I don’t want to fight. I want us to be… We need to spend some time not thinking about anything except us.”"
