Chapter 154
“What happened? You having a panic induced asthma attack?”
“Yes sir. They always land me in the hospital. I’m stripped of my clothes and they find the injuries in addition to my mental illness. Three times they found out. Three times I answered their questions. Three times they insisted on painful medical tests to prove my statements and three times I’m punished for lying before getting sent home. Although I can’t say that I wanted to stay at any of them. I was at Yellowtail, Blue Mountain and Red Moon packs for three months, the same as the rest of the prospects from Red Fang. Even though they initially gave me hope that their recognition of the abuse may make it end, it didn't take long after getting out of the hospital for the alpha to show his true colors.”
Cole seems to be settling down as he starts into his story, what he’s willing to tell. He’s finally found a comfortable position and decided to rest his head on my shoulder. I’ve managed to cross my legs so that his knees are resting on top with his heels touching the bed. I’ve placed pillows on top of our legs with my arms laying across my own. His arms have finally settled beside mine and I’m brushing my fingertips gently along the tops of his hands.
“The last pack I visited, Red Moon, ended up being the hardest. It started off easier than the previous packs as it was the delta that got us off the bus and started the testing and training. The alpha there wasn’t quite as hands on. On the fifth day there we had a particularly hard sparring match.
The delta somehow realized that I had injuries which made me slower and weaker than the others even though I’m an alpha. He exploited that weakness and it hurt me badly. I barely made it through the match without blacking out and that night I ended up in a nightmare. When I’m off my medication they are often vivid enough that I lash out.”
“Hmmm, I’ve seen that. They got fairly nasty in the wing. That’s why I took you out early.”
He’s starting to lean to the right, allowing me to slowly change my hold on him. I’ve slipped one arm around his side encouraging him to lean into me as he talks. His eyes are still closed as I bring my other hand to the side of his head gently combing through his hair.
He startles and whimpers loudly at the new contact, raising his hand as if to stop me from doing it.
“Easy there, everything is okay.”
I soothe his fight gently as he gets comfortable with the attention I’m giving him.
“When no one is around to hear my whimpers and screams I don’t wake up from the dream until I fall out of the bed. The shock from the fall tends to trigger both the panic and asthma attacks at the same time and without the rescue inhaler and Xanax I get so bad that only the hospital can help me. I made it through the night much like I did here and the delta found me in a similar condition as your son did. Big difference was the delta told me to head to the hospital and gave me directions like I knew the place.
That was the first time I met Alpha Anthony. I was stumbling and falling from the lack of oxygen in my lungs. Somehow I ended up outside of his first floor office and I ended up hitting the outside of the building enough for him to get up and come outside. He became very interested in my distress and helped me to the hospital wing. I ended up spending about two months in the hospital. Stress makes it harder for my wolf to heal me and even after I opened up and told him parts of what was going on at home, the beta let it slip about a month in that Alpha Anthony thought I was lying. That I was making excuses for being a weak alpha.
After ten weeks in the hospital I stopped having the anxiety attacks long enough that the alpha put me in the medical room on the same floor as him. He insisted that I come down to dinner that night. That’s when I found out who he really was.”
“You don’t feel that you knew him before?”
“His presence with the prospects was minimal and even after he took me to the hospital the only time he came around was to check on my progress. He told us early on that he was a strict alpha but nothing prepared me for how mean and unforgiving he was.”
“I consider myself strict and quite unforgiving on certain things.”
He shakes his head hard and opens his eyes for the first time since he started talking.
“No alpha, you’re by the book. At least so far that I’ve seen. Alpha Anthony….”
He pauses as his voice wavers, tears filling his eyes. I can tell that he’s hitting the harder parts of the story and just like when he was talking about Luna Sasha, I know he’s going to get reactive. I reach over to touch his hair and as anticipated, he uses his arms to block my attempt to touch him.
“Cole, I know from here it’s going to get tough on you so it’s important that you allow me to touch you as it’s going to provide you a ground. Have you ever heard of grounding?”
“No sir.”
I’m not shocked at his answer as I’m not certain how many packs use the term.
“Grounding is when I help keep you from going too far into the memory you’re talking about. I use positive touch to distract you, to keep you grounded in reality.”
He nods his head as I gently lower his arms from in front of his face. Without prompting he continues into his story.
“Alpha Anthony had dinner every night with his family, which included twin boys around six years old or so. His beta, his mate and his four year old boy and the delta, his mate and five year old girl. Alpha made it clear what his expectations of the young children were.
Each child got served a plate, they were expecting to eat at least half before they were considered done. They were not to speak unless spoken to and they were to stay seated until the adults were finished eating.
I didn’t feel that the expectations were unfair but I did notice that the beta served his son a very small plate of food and the pup was quite hungry. He waited politely until his father and mother finished serving themselves but before his father sat down he tugged on his father’s shirt. His father shrugged him off, not even looking at his plate while telling him to eat his food. The little guy was close enough that I was able to get a buttered roll to him, which he took graciously and ate slowly.
He tried again to get his father’s attention but was again ignored. I even tried to get his attention but got told off for getting involved with children that I have no right to be concerned about. Well David ended up running out of patience and after twenty minutes of being ignored he stood up in his seat and started reaching for the macaroni and cheese. I could tell by the way he was leaning on the table and tipping the chair back that he was going to fall. When the chair gave out he knocked it, his drink and the dish of macaroni over. Like with Madisyn, I was able to get to him and keep him from getting hurt.
I could tell by his eyes and the way he clung to me that it scared him. I was about to pick up his chair and help clean up what little mess he made when I noticed alpha standing up and removing his belt. He commanded me to bring him the child but I straight refused, backing away into the living room. His father came after me. He commanded me to let go of David and when I didn’t he punched me in the jaw. He snatched him from my arms and carried him to the table.”
Once I was able to sit up I noticed that the end of the table where alpha sat had been cleared. The other kids had been moved to the opposite end of the table and his mom and luna were standing on the opposite side of the alpha and beta.
Beta walked up to the alpha and held him out like he was presenting him to him. Alpha grabbed his pants and pulled them down to his ankles, completely disrobing him from the waist down. He was then laid on his stomach, his legs dangling over the edge. His mom and luna both took an arm and held it above his head as well as had a hand on his back. His father also put a hand on his back. He was frantic. It was obvious this had happened to him before.”
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