Chapter 191

(Jessa’s POV)

It’s been a month since I last saw Cole. As much as I want to be near him, the pull isn’t nearly as strong for me as it is for him. While his wolf has been given the opportunity to heal, now that the silver that was slowly poisoning his body was successfully removed two months ago, my wolf hasn’t been so lucky.
For the first time in years my wolf is awake and searching for him. I can actually feel her inside me, hear her whimper for the mate she longs for but this new activity with her comes at a price for me.
While it’s mild, I recognize the classic symptoms of silver withdrawal and the cold-like symptoms I came down with the day he arrived has slowly morphed into flu-like aches plaguing my entire body.
I’ve gone through repeated withdrawals from silver poisoning over the three and a half years that I was a rogue, bouncing in and out of packs like the pinball inside an arcade game until Dr. Pierce found me three years ago. She knew Alpha Demetri was looking for someone like me.
I was already in the process of getting kicked out of the Purple Mountain pack so taking her up on her offer of moving me to another pack was a simple move. Though it wasn’t an easy one considering every pack that has discovered my empathic abilities has treated me as a feral and purposely weakened me with silver.
I didn’t know it then, but it was an empath that Alpha was looking for. Dr. Pierce simply recognized the signs that not only was I an empath but I was also in desperate need of some help. While I was terrified of moving so quickly from one pack to another I knew that my best protection from attack during my withdrawal was within the protection of a pack. I also knew that as long as I made myself scarce during the worst of it the wolves within the pack would leave me be.
Over the first year I was here I discovered that this pack has not only embraced but has even encouraged me to further develop my gift, at least Alpha Demetri and Dr. Pierce has.
‘Mate. We need to find mate.’ A sudden voice inside my head stops me in my tracks. I look around my exam room, looking for anyone that may have snuck in while I am going through my end of day cleaning routine. I know my search is in vain considering only a pup would sneak into my room for fun or speak in such a way.
‘Mate upset. Must find him.’ I hear the voice again as I slowly turn, making eye contact briefly with Dr. Pierce.
“Are you okay, Jessa? You look quite distracted.”
“I’m okay, Dr. Pierce.” I speak unusually slow as I receive a clipped growl at the end of my sentence.
Both she and alpha have been actively discouraging me from calling them by their titles. I can’t begin to count how many times they have told me that I’m an alpha, an equal to them deserving of the ability to call them Angela and Demetri. Yet I continue with my old ways. They are known and safe for me.
“I’m sorry, Angela.” I struggle to get her name off my tongue. “I’ve got a nagging voice in my head telling me that Cole’s having a hard time right now. That he might be in some trouble.”
“A nagging voice? I don’t think I’ve ever heard someone refer to their inner wolf’s voice as nagging. Does she not talk to you?”
“This is the first time in five years.” I whisper in the hopes that she doesn’t push for more answers.
While my past isn’t as dark as Cole’s ongoing horror, the three years I spent as a rogue, before getting brought into alpha Demetri’s pack, has left some heavy scars behind.
“You know, I was beginning to wonder if you even had a wolf.”
“Why’s that?” I can’t help but wonder out loud.
“Normally, when an empath starts using their gift on a regular basis to help others, their ability to identify the various issues associated with the help they give will strengthen.
Since you work in the medical field, I would expect your knowledge and confidence in your ability to diagnose an issue without tests to grow. Yet I feel that you’ve become increasingly reliant upon the tests and are questioning your abilities far more than when you first got here.
You heal similarly to a pup and I have never seen you shift. So, yes. I’ve wondered for the last year if your wolf had gone dormant.”
‘Not dormant. Awake now. Mate needs us. We go find him.’ I close my eyes and rub the side of my head as the reintroduction to my wolf’s voice is proving mildly uncomfortable.
“You can sense Cole?” Dr. Pierce asks quietly, concern in her voice.
“She can.” I respond while nodding my head and rubbing my temple at the same time.
“What’s going on?”
“I’m not certain. It seems he’s in some sort of trouble.”
‘Mate not trouble. Mate’s sad. Mate’s mad. Mate’s very fast. Very confused. Needs help.’
My wolf’s childish rambling annoys me but gives me some insight as to what I’ll find when I seek him out.
“It sounds like a panic attack.”
“Demetri moved him into one of the downstairs guest rooms. I believe it’s the first one on the right. I’ll finish up here.”
“Thank you.”
I give her a smile as I head out of my room and down the hall. With my pediatric room being the first exam room you come to on the left of the medical wing, it’s a short walk before entering the common room. I’m about halfway across the very large room when alpha lifts his head and looks directly at me. I sigh in relief when he says nothing and returns to his food before I can hear Damian talking again.
I head towards the hallway situated behind the stairs, slowing my walk down as I approach his closed door. I hear a door slam shut just as I place my hand upon the handle. I’ve never had much luck with angry alpha males and knowing this angry alpha is my mate terrifies me.
I slowly creak the door open to find the room in one piece.
“Are you okay?” I ask softly, trying to keep my own nervousness at bay.
“I’m sorry Jessa. I really am. You deserve to see me when I’m not flipping out. I don’t even know why I am upset but it’s bad, I’m bad.”
He puts his head back into his hands as he continues to lean on the entertainment center.
“Should I call alpha?”
“Let him eat with his family. I just need some water and to find my Ativan.”
He tries to explain before he darts off to the bathroom. I can’t help but wince as I hear him losing whatever may be left in his stomach.
“I promise I’ll be back.” I yell out as I make my way out to the kitchen.
It doesn’t take long to make my way to the kitchen. I can see alpha look up and sit back in his seat as I open the fridge.
“Everything okay, Jessa?”
His voice is calm yet concerned. I shake my head as I talk.
“He’s in some sort of panic attack. Do you know any reason why?”
I sit down in the empty chair beside alpha.
“I have a few ideas what may be causing it but it’s important for him to voice what’s going on. I’ll link with Julie and come to his room in a few.”
“Thank you.” I stand from the chair and start back to Cole’s room.
I was only gone from him a few minutes but I know from experience how agonizingly long those handful of minutes feel.
I open his door slowly and walk across the floor. The creaks beneath the carpet giving away my presence and I can only hope that my scent gets to him before I do.

The Son of Red Fang
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