Chapter 19
I made the decision, sitting in my bed all alone that it would be the last time I saw him. I needed to move on and if that meant taking pills or seeing a shrink, then that’s what I would do. I got up and put on my running gear, I needed to get my head straight before I went to work, I had too much to do to be consumed by thoughts of him. My shoulder ached as I put on my sports bra, but I powered through it and grabbed two painkillers out of the bottle before I left. When I got back, I showered quickly, enjoying the warm water but not allowing myself time to revel in it. I decided to wear my grey pinstripe pants and a lilac long-sleeved shirt and my ivory jacket, with matching heels. I sent a text to my mother on my commute, and one to Warren asking about the super and Mrs Shapiro. I was still nervous about messing up and terrified of getting fired, but I had calmed my breathing down by the time I opened the big glass door to the building. I didn’t give the horrible receptionist from my interview a glance as I walked past her, head held high, towards the stalls and card swipe machines. There were a lot of people waiting to enter, and I found myself scanning the faces, wondering how many I would really get to know, would I be able to spot someone who didn’t belong eventually? No one seemed to be flagging me, so maybe not, I thought as I swiped my ID badge and caught the elevator before it closed. By the time I reached my floor, I was one of only three people still riding, I didn’t recognise either of them, but I smiled warmly at them both, the woman gave me a horrid look like I was evil incarnate, the man returned my smile but weakly. The moment the doors opened the woman stormed out; I gave the guy a look like what the hell did I do? He just shrugged and scurried out after her, leaving me alone to walk through the floor until I got to my office, where Kendra was already at her desk.
“I thought we said you wouldn’t come in until nine?” I asked her, giving her a mock disapproving look.
“My ride comes in for eight, and being as I was here anyway, I just started working.” She couldn’t meet my eye.
“Mmhmm, and is this the same ride that leaves at five?” Again, she couldn’t meet my eyes.
“If I have to stay, she said it's not a problem, she will wait for me, there’s a coffee shop across the street and she loves their mocha lattes so it’s really not a big deal.”
“Okay, it's fine, you should have said something, I can work around you leaving at five, and if I need you to work later, I will make sure you get paid overtime. If your friend is willing, she can come up here and hang out in the conference room or something. Just let me know so I don’t have to put you in a bind.” It was easy to forget how young Kendra was, she had much more experience than me, but she only looked twenty-two. “Okay, why don’t you come in my office and tell me what you’ve done so far and then if you wouldn’t mind making us both a coffee I can start sorting through my emails and we can plan out our morning with caffeine!” I smiled and she seemed to calm down and cheer up.
We planned our whole day not just the morning, Kendra was helpful without being underfoot and made a lot of useful suggestions. I decided I would interview around twenty-five people, ten designers and fifteen engineers. Most already worked at Appletree but there were a couple I had met at school who I knew would be ideal for the team. Kendra was still covering Elaina at lunch until someone else could be found, but she made sure I had another coffee before she left for her lunch break. I was deep into decorating ideas by the time she came back from covering Elaina’s desk, I had been so preoccupied I hadn’t even thought of getting something to eat myself. So, when Kendra went to make our coffee and she brought me back a fruit plate, some yoghurt and a peanut butter sandwich, it was so sweet and completely unexpected. “You didn’t have to do that,” I said as she placed the food on my desk.
“I wouldn’t have to if you weren’t so bad at looking after yourself.” She said in the same mock disapproving tone I had used on her that morning. I couldn’t help but snort, my mouth full of peanut butter, but I was glad she wasn’t afraid of me anymore. It may have only been two days, but her insight had been invaluable. She knew who was lazy, who wasn’t appreciated, who had dreams and ambitions their current position wouldn’t fulfil, and that was just in the engineering and design departments. She also knew who was loyal, and who wouldn’t give up the position they had without a very good reason. It had helped me whittle down the very long list of people Ms Michaels had emailed over to our much more reasonable twenty-five. She started typing up emails to invite our shortlist to interview while I ate my lunch and picked the last of my office furniture. By the end of the day, she had emailed everyone and helped me fill out the requisition forms for my office leaving me time to get some design specs started for my R and D meeting on the following Monday. She even went and got me a bottle of water from the kitchen before she took off for the day, reminding me not to work too late as she left. An hour later I was burned out and too tired to do anymore, I shut down the office and headed out. I was trying to decide whether or not to knock on Warren’s door when I got home when he finally text back.
“Hi, sorry I couldn’t get back to you sooner, work’s been hectic today. I called the super and he was going to call Mrs Shapiro today. He should be getting back to me soon to let me know if he got in touch with her or not. I can pop by your apartment tonight when I hear from him if you’d like?” I bit my lip, I didn’t want to lead him on, but maybe he was just being friendly... I decided to tell him I was working late and asked him to text me when he heard one way or the other.
I got home a little before seven, kicked my shoes off and headed straight for the kitchen, Kendra was right, I needed to take better care of myself starting with eating more. My clothes were loose from all the meals I had skipped, and I didn’t like it. I made myself a roast chicken breast with brown rice, steamed veggies and a mango chilli sauce. While my chicken was in the oven, I called my mom and updated her on the job. I told her all about Kendra and we chatted over a glass of wine, I felt twenty times better when I hung up to plate up my food. It was still early when I was done, had put away the leftovers in the fridge, cleaned the kitchen and changed into my sweats, so I grabbed my laundry basket and headed to the basement. With my earphones in and I tried not to think about not taking my sleeping pill so I could see him again. Once my laundry was on, I decided to choose an outfit for my meeting with Mr Daniel Summer and I needed to look my best, he had lobbied for me to get everything Appletree had given me, I couldn’t make a fool out of myself or let him down. On my way to put my clothes in the dryer, I almost walked straight into Warren leaving his apartment.
“Oh, hi.” I blushed.
“Hi, I was just coming to see if you were home. Carl, the super, called Mrs Shapiro a few times but didn’t get an answer so he’s left a message and he will go over tomorrow if she doesn’t get back to him by lunchtime, so you don’t need to worry.”
“Oh, thanks but that doesn’t stop me from worrying. I mean, if she fell a few days ago then she could be dead by now and we wouldn’t know.” My eyes pricked with tears, I was genuinely afraid and felt guilty for not doing something sooner, I should have checked on her more. He grabbed my upper arms and started rubbing them gently, I think it was meant to be comforting but it just felt uncomfortable, like he was avoiding making too much contact. I managed a weak smile at him, and he gave me one back. “I need to get downstairs; I have laundry in the machines.” I tried to go around him, but he interrupted me, putting his hands up to stop me.
“I was just heading there myself; I have clothes in the dryer. Do you mind if I join you?” He asked. I really couldn’t stop him, and I didn’t have a good excuse to say no so I just nodded, and we walked downstairs together in silence. When we got into the basement it dawned on me, I had a load of delicates to pull out, I cringed internally, not wanting to flaunt my underwear in front of a man that had already asked me out. He headed straight for the dryers, so I tried to use my body as cover and pulled my sports bras and underwear out as quickly as possible. I felt his eyes on me as I moved to the next machine and pulled out my running gear and pyjamas. “I didn’t know you were a runner.” He commented as I pulled out the last of my exercise gear.
“Umm, yeah, I am, ever since high school... but how did you know that?” I suddenly felt uneasy, there wasn’t anything about my clothes that was specific to running, it was just normal fitness wear.
“Well, I thought I saw you coming back from a run this morning when I was heading to work, but I wasn’t sure it was you until I saw you pull out the same sweatshirt just now, I wasn’t being a creeper or anything I promise. I’m impressed though, you get up early to run, and you stay up late working and doing laundry, when do you sleep?” He chuckled, I still felt uneasy but tried to push it aside.
“Oh, okay, umm, I usually go to bed pretty early and a run first thing wakes me up and gets me right for the day. It helps me relax and it's like meditation for me, puts me in the right frame of mind before a big or stressful day.” I babbled, heading over to the dryers where he was still standing, folding his clothes.
“Hey, have you thought any more about that drink?” I froze as I was loading the dryer.
“I’m just not ready for anything right now. I’m sorry.” I mumbled that fear creeping up my spine.
“That’s okay, you have my number, so give me a call if you feel like it. No pressure.” He hastily added. I forced a smile and scrambled to the door. Eager to flee to the safety of my apartment. I hung my underwear in the bathroom and flicked through the TV channels until I had to go get the rest of my things. I peeked down the stairs, hoping Warren was long gone, when it looked like it was clear I dashed down the stairs, ripped the clothes out of the dryer and dashed back to my apartment. I took my pill the moment I got back inside, put my clothes away and packed my bag for the morning. I could barely keep my eyes open by the time I was done, so I washed my face, brushed my teeth and crawled into bed, relieved to have a dreamless sleep before my first meeting with Daniel Summer.
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