Chapter 50 - The Song
Cat and Trey decided to leave for Monterey in one week. That would give her more time with Valerie to sort some things out with everything that had happened recently. It would also allow Trey to tie up a few loose ends he wanted to take care of for Cat.
One of those loose ends was finding her mother's remains and having them shipped to Sacramento so she could rest where Cat could visit her. She wasn't aware of his plans, and he wouldn't dare move her mother until he got her okay. First, he had to find where Emma was buried.
Cat was meeting with Valerie, who was helping her find music that she could enjoy without the fear of bringing up bad memories. Valerie believed music was good therapy. She hoped finding the right song would speak to Cat and assist in her healing.
As Valerie went through the music with Cat, she kept away from any songs from the eighties or nineties because those tended to remind her of her past. She wanted Cat to find something new and fresh before easing her to the songs that reminded her of her mother.
While they played different songs, Cat talked to Valerie about her and Trey's upcoming trip to Monterey. She was so excited to see the ocean and go to the beach. Valerie felt very small when she spoke to someone like Cat, who had lived in a bubble of fear their entire lives.
Most people have positive and negative experiences throughout their childhood, and as adults, they build on those. However, Cat's childhood was one trauma after another. With no foundation to build from, her road was extremely rocky to begin with.
Cat suddenly stopped talking and was listening intently to the song playing. Valerie noticed tears running down her cheeks, but she didn't say anything.
"Can you play that song again?" Cat asked her in almost a whisper.
Valerie did as she asked and took note of the song. It was Rescue by Lauren Daigle. As she listened to the lyrics, she understood why Cat would want to hear this song again. When the song ended, she looked over at Valerie.
"That song makes me cry, but with happiness. It makes me think of Trey, his team, and you as the army who rescued me from the darkness. It also makes me think of those still out there who need rescuing. I was apprehensive when you said you wanted me to connect with a song because I didn't think there was anything that could speak to me. This song has proven me wrong. Thank you." Cat hugged her as they listened to the song again.
As Cat listened to the lyrics, she felt the waves of hope washing over her. The song was not a happy one, but it was a song of hope. Trey and those who rescued her were her light; now, she was ready to be the light for others.
She couldn't wait to play the song for Trey. Cat finally saw what Valerie had meant about starting with one song. She wanted to find more music, but right now, she wanted to listen to Rescue over and over. Valerie suggested that she try listening to other music from the same artist when she was ready.
When Cat came bounding into the pool house, Trey looked at her in surprise. Her sessions with Valerie were typically very emotional, but today she looked excited. Her cheeks were flushed, and her eyes were bright. Trey would never get tired of what a beautiful woman his mate was.
"Guess what? Valerie helped me find a song I could listen to without falling apart. It still made me cry, but it was from how much it touched me personally." Cat hugged Trey in pure joy.
"That's great. Play it for me, and then I have something I need to talk to you about." Trey had found Emma and wanted to ask Cat's permission to bring her to Sacramento. He hoped this would help her find closure. He understood how important it was to say goodbye so the heart could heal. Cat's heart had been raw for far too long.
Trey smiled as he watched her run over to the smart device on the counter. From how she looked a few months ago, she was like a whole new person. He could still see reflections from the past in her eyes, but when her face lit up with happiness, it made his knees weak. She was the most stunning woman he'd ever seen, and she was his. Atlas growled, reminding Trey that she was theirs.
"What did you think of the song?" He had been so focused on Cat that he hadn't heard the music she was playing at all.
"Can you play it again?" She nodded happily and had it restart. This time he listened and understood why she would like it. Listening to it made him realize how much he took for granted the simple pleasure of listening to music. Someone like Cat had too much heartache to find happiness in the little things until she was shown the way. His heart ached, and he vowed never to take even the smallest things for granted again.
"This song is talking about you and everyone else who has helped me. Mostly you, though. You lit the way for me whenever the darkness threatened to pull me back. I cry listening to this because it depicts how I felt before meeting you. I didn't think I had anything left to live for, but you showed me I was wrong." Cat didn't know if she was describing correctly all the ways these lyrics affected her, but she hoped he understood.
"I know, Cat. As soon as the music started, I knew why you liked it. You fail to realize I didn't just rescue you; you also recused me." Trey leaned down and kissed her, letting all his love for her be felt in his kiss.
"You always know the right thing to say to sweep me off my feet and turn me into mush. What did you want to talk about?" Cat wrapped her arms around him, feeling a lightness she'd never felt before. She hadn't realized how depressed she was until she started working through it. The depression had felt like a heavy cloak holding her down and keeping her from moving forward. With the help of those around her, she has been able to peel that heaviness off layer by layer. She was almost ready to fly.
"I found where your mother's remains are buried in Indiana. With your permission, I'd like to have them moved out here. I thought maybe you would like to have her close so you could visit whenever you wanted." Cat's eyes widened in disbelief.
"You found her? Can we really have her moved out here?" Cat had never imagined moving someone from one burial place to another. She would like to have her mother close by. It would give her peace knowing where she was and being able to talk to her.
"I found her, and yes, we can have her moved out here. We'll find a plot for her in an area of your choice. We can start looking before we leave for Monterey, so hopefully, when we get back, she'll already be here. Is that okay?" Trey saw the smile spread across Cat's face and knew he had made the right decision.
"Yes, that sounds perfect. Do you think we can find a place where they will let us plant lilacs? Those were her favorite flowers. They're mine too. I haven't seen any in a long time, but I can still smell them like they're next to me." Trey realized this was the first time she had talked about a memory of her mother and didn't cry. Instead, she had a nostalgic look on her face that made him smile. His kitten was healing.
"We'll find a place where you can plant whatever you want." Trey wrapped her in his arms and breathed in her scent. They were moving forward, and soon she would no longer be his kitten; she would be his lioness.
