CHAPTER 37
I was standing in the office of the shooting range, almost turning into a puddle in front of Harry and the intimate and beautiful way that he was finally treating me.
He finally released my hand, but he brought his hands up to cup my face, softly. Forcing me to keep my eyes on him.
“You have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen.” Harry said.
I couldn’t even explain the emotions that were exploding inside of me. There were fireworks going off in my stomach, my heart was racing.
It was almost hard to believe that Harry was capable of being so kind, soft and sweet towards another person.
I never thought that he was a bad person. I just knew that he never let himself get this close to anyone. But right here, right now, he was saying the sort of words that I have longed for my whole life.
I tried to control my emotions, but it didn’t stop a lone tear from falling from my eyes.
Harry gently wiped it away with his thumb and as he was still staring me straight in the eye.
I’ve never been able to look people in the eye before. But for some reason, I didn’t have a problem with doing it here.
“I’m sorry.” He finally said.
“Sorry for what?” I asked, confused.
“For everything. I’ve been trying to stay away from you. I’ve been trying to keep my distance, for both of our sakes. But it’s too damn hard. It’s actually impossible. I can’t stay away any longer.” He said.
Harry was finally admitting his feelings to me, everything that I had wanted him to say.
But I suddenly got hit with a wave of guilt. Knowing now that Harry does have feelings for me, real feelings for me, I couldn’t help but feel how my presence in their house and around them in general was a threat and a huge burden to them.
I was the one that was screwing up here. I had been so confused since I came to live with them.
Going from a house where I was abused daily and told that I was never good enough, to a house where everyone in it can’t seem to get enough of being around me. Who swear that they are going to protect me from anything and everything that tries to hurt me.
And now I was feeling like the bitch. Like I had been leading them on or something, but that was never my intention. I never knew that I was even doing it until just this second.
I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and I took a little step back from Harry.
“I’m the one that’s sorry. I shouldn’t be here.” I said, turning to leave the office but Harry grabbed me from behind and he wrapped his arms around me, not letting me leave.
“Skylar. You have nothing to be sorry about. You’ve done nothing wrong. I’ve always wanted you because you have something that I haven’t seen in a really long time. It scared me at first. You possess this light that I have longed for, for so long. I did try to push away from you, but that’s because I was scared. I was scared of getting hurt again. I was scared that you were going to end up the same way as Lizzy.” Harry explained, holding me tight. I could feel his breath on my neck and I found that I couldn’t move. Not even if I wanted to. “We’re dangerous people, Skylar. We were never meant to protect or save anyone. We are only meant to do what we had to do to survive. And then you came along and you just made all of us fall in love with you. You are so pure and I am terrified that we are going to destroy you.” Harry admitted.
“Pure. I don’t know if I’m as pure as you think.” I said, through the tears. Now thinking of dad’s friends and how they made sure that I was no longer pure.
“I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about your heart and the way you have just accepted us, even though I know you know more than you let on.” He said. And I chuckled through the slight sobs that were coming from me.
“I don’t know anything.” I lied. And he knew that I was lying, but that’s how we had been playing this game. I didn’t ask them why they lived together or trained the way they did, and they pretended like I never saw anything. It worked out great for us so far.
Even after his confession that they were dangerous, I wasn’t scared. I wasn’t afraid of them.
Instead, I was starting to feel more and more like I belonged with them. Like this was my purpose in life. Instead of ending my life.
I finally turned to face Harry and I raised my hand to place it on his cheek.
“You don’t need to hide yourself from me. You don’t have to hide your feelings. You say that you’re dangerous, but I’m not scared of you. None of you. I don’t think I could ever be scared of you.” I admitted.
I saw Harry’s face change, almost instantly into something that I had never seen before. His defenses practically crumbled right before me and he grabbed my waist and pulled me closer as he kissed me, passionately and desperately. I wrapped my arms around his neck.
I could feel all of his emotions seeping out of him as they mixed with mine at the same time. I didn’t want this feeling to ever stop.
I wanted to stay in his arms, like this, forever.
He pulled me closer so that my chest and stomach were flush up against his.
I could feel his heart beating through his chest and it was racing just as fast as mine was.
We’ve had our moments in the past, but I have never felt this closer to him. Our very different qualities bringing us closer together.
He wrapped his hands up in my hair and I had my arms around his shoulders, trying to pull him as close as I could.
We were already pressed right up against each other, but it still didn’t feel close enough.
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