Friday, October 18th Pt. 5
“Does she have a pattern?”
“She didn’t come to my attention until the end of her first year. Angela came to my office alerting me that she takes two weeks off every three months. I am a strict alpha with my pack and new transfers are not immune to my expectations. After speaking extensively with Angela and Kathy, I called Jessa to my office the next time she called out sick. Kathy felt she was faking it and simply didn’t want the workload she had. Angela was a little more forgiving. She felt that Jessa was sick but was concerned about the pattern. As I just started saying, I called her to the office the next time it presented. Angela just about dragged her there because of her fear of me. I knew immediately that she wasn’t faking it even though it didn’t aggravate my intuitive side. I asked a series of questions about what blood work or other medical tests had been done and upon realizing she never got the standard physical that all wolves get I ordered blood work to be done. Despite her weakened state she fought hard. I again had to lay on her to pin her down and Angela used the more painful vein in her ankle to draw her blood. She went into a panic attack and I ended up holding her for a long time after Angela was done. The only thing that showed on her bloodwork was minute traces of silver. The classic result you get when a wolf has been exposed.”
“Have you done this during every episode?”
“Done what?”
“Blood work.”
“No sir. It’s too traumatizing. I did, however, start taking the time to go to her when she’s sick and assist Angela in her care. We bring her food, maintain her home, make certain she has what she needs to be comfortable. Doing so has allowed her to gain some trust towards me but she has a lot more trust towards my son, Damian.” I nod my head.
“Do you know how much she weighs?”
“150.”
“And you?”
“275.”
”Thank you.” I praise as he didn’t ask why I needed his.
I make my way over to him as he’s yet to come any closer to me. His eyes are closed as he struggles mentally and physically.
“You need this.”
I whisper as I wrap my arms around him, pulling him quietly into a hug. My silent gesture of comfort proves to be his undoing as he finally lets go of his guilt, fear and grief. He lays his head upon my shoulder without thinking, wrapping me into a tight hug.
“I’m sorry Jessa. So, so sorry.” He whispers as he cries.
I rub between his shoulders several minutes as I slowly work up to his neck. He’s managed to reign in his emotions by the time I place my hand around the back of his neck. His breathing is even and his body relaxed as I start my read on him. It’s a brief check over his body confirming that the majority of his physical issues is the painfully intense nausea. It’s easy for me to tell that he’s lost his stomach enough times that it is painfully tight. I move slowly back to his shoulders before I speak.
“Your nausea is extreme enough that I’d like to give you a shot of the same medication I’m going to give Jessa. I’d like to do it back here as you’re sensitive enough for it to cause you decent pain and I think seeing you squirm will cause her to fight. Stay with me as long as you need. When you’re ready, I’d like you to take a seat and roll up your sleeve.”
“Thank you.” He whispers as he nods.
“For what?”
“Understanding.”
He keeps it simple as he starts to let go of my shirt. He takes several more deep breaths before he stands. I keep my hands on him until I’m certain he has his balance. He looks around as he steps away from my touch.
“Right behind you.”
I point to the closest chair. He takes a few steps until he’s in front of it, lifting his shirt before he sits. He slides his left arm from the sleeve and situates his shirt so it drops across his chest exposing his upper arm. He leans his other arm on the counter, turning his head as I wipe down the spot I’m going to use.
“Are you okay?”
“I may not fear shots like Jessa and Cole but I don’t like them either.” He explains as he puts his head in his hand.
“Deep, even breaths. This is 2 mil and I’m giving it in two doses. Express what you need to but don’t fight.”
He nods as he starts into deep breathing. I give him a minute to find a relaxing pace before placing the needle into the muscle of his upper arm. He flinches but stays relaxed. I quickly give the first mil, stopping as he gives me a subtle whine and pulls his arm slightly away.
“Breath Demetri.” I remind him.
I rub my thumb softly against the skin just above his elbow where I have a gentle hold on his arm.
“Are you ready?” I ask as he starts breathing more evenly.
I wait several seconds for him to relax after he nods to push the rest of the medication. He stifles a yelp as the second half goes in rougher than the first. I withdraw the needle and grab the bandage I have laying on the counter. I rub his arm in gentle circles in an effort to break up the sting.
“I’m sorry. I had a feeling your sensitivity was high enough to make that a rough shot to handle. Even though she’s lying with Cole I do believe I will need you to submit her to give this medication to her.”
“What’s the overall plan? The way you spoke to her felt like she’s near the end. I would never forgive myself if she dies from something I could have helped her with.”
His voice cracks as he nears the end of his sentence. I grab a stool and sit in front of him.
“It’s critical that you understand that there’s nothing you could have done. Only an empath can diagnose silver poisoning in another empath.”
“I have a certified detox facility, an entire floor dedicated to helping people and wolves alike withdraw and detox from drugs, silver, wolfsbane, you name it. I know how empaths are commonly treated. I neglected my own protocols when she came in. If I had just done the physical, the blood work, I could have caught that she had silver in her blood and put her in the hospital. I could have kept her from this misery.”
He’s weeping again as he struggles.
“As hard as it is, Demetri, I need you to stop. Look at me. Listen to my words. Repeat them until you have it committed to memory. It’s not your fault.”
I hold his cheeks between my hands forcing him to look at me as I repeat what he needs to hear.
“It’s not your fault. Empaths are not normal wolves. You can not treat what you can not find.”
He looks at me intently as if he doesn’t fully understand what I had just said.
“Let go of the guilt my brother.” I beg him quietly. “Unless you have an empath at your hospital there is no way for you to have known. Even when she first arrived and fell ill shortly after. We empaths don’t react as others do. Our wolves immediately take on all silver, wolfsbane and any other poisons that we are exposed to. While the symptoms of withdrawal are present without an empath to direct you to the specialized blood tests you will never find the silver. It takes massive overdoses just to make us sick and even then it has to happen multiple times before you get to the state Jessa is in. As much as you want to blame yourself there’s nothing you could have done differently without an empath at your hospital to examine her wolf. You can not fight what you can not find.”
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