Sunday, January 27th, 2019
It’s been just over six weeks since Lucas came to me with his confession of what happened to him and about two months since I removed Molly and her kids from Red Fang.
While Molly and the girls have adapted well to the change Jeremy has had it a lot harder. Despite intense, daily therapy, the little boy struggles daily with the attack he endured. Unfortunately, his struggles with anger and grief has overwhelmed Molly and the final straw occurred two weeks ago when he physically attacked and injured his sister Brittany. None of them understand what triggered the attack but it prompted me to do what I never want to do and I removed him from their home.
Therapy hasn’t uncovered a reason for him to become so violent towards his own family but it’s become obvious that the young beta has been devastated by his alpha’s betrayal. His mom and sisters still see and interact with him daily but he’s been moved into Lilly and I’s room for the time being. It wasn’t a big deal considering my own son’s nightmares keeping him up at night.
At seventeen years old I never imagined him needing the comfort of sleeping in his parent's room but within a week of his revelation his ptsd kicked in and I started finding him sleeping uncomfortably on the floor beside my bed.
Neither of them are attending school at Meadow Wood yet. We’ve tried three times to get Luke on to the oral Silvix but each time we’ve stopped the IV stuff he’s come to me within days begging for help. I’ve resorted to having all the meetings I usually attend at other packs moved here so I can be here when he, and now Jeremy, need my help.
He’s been on his most recent dose for nearly two weeks without incident, giving me hope that we’ve found the oral dosage that he needs to be on. My plan is to get him started at Meadow Wood tomorrow.
Today is an oddball day as I’m finally able to attend the first of several meetings that have been postponed three times. I’ve got a half dozen alphas and their betas here to start training on how to run a sanctuary pack, a project I’ve worked on for the last four years that I haven’t held second runs.
I’m not paying as much attention as I should to Patrick’s overview of the basic information I’ve put together when commotion in the hallway pulls me completely away.
“Excuse me.” I speak as I stand, making my way to the door.
“Nooooo! Don’t spank me! I’m sorry I hit him alpha.”
Jeremy’s cries echo off my office walls. I step next door to my conference room into the office to see no one there but his cries are easily heard inside.
“Jeremy Brayden.”
I sing gently as I walk around the room. This has become an all too common incidence and I know exactly where to find him. I pull my chair away from my desk and squat down in front of it.
“I’m in the middle of a meeting Jeremy. I need you to come next door with me.”
I speak gently to the sobbing ball this child has curled himself into but he hears my directions and starts crawling out from under the desk. I take his hand as he tries to calm himself but I know stepping into this room is going to be a big trigger.
I guide him calmly into the conference room, Patrick is still going over the beginning presentation. It only takes a moment for Jeremy to realize that he is in a room full of alphas.
“Nooo!”
He shrieks as he turns to run from the room. I step in his way causing him to run into my legs in his blind panic to leave. I wrap my hands under his arms and lift him from the floor triggering his panic even more.
“I’m sorry I hit him. Please don’t spank me.”
He cries in fear as I bring him to my chest.
“What happened Jeremy?” I finally ask.
“Harley was in the medical wing. Dr. Pierce said it was okay to follow her. I was being good. I swear I was. He said he had heard about me. That I was a bad pup. That dad sent me away because I got in trouble with my alpha. He said I deserved what I got and that you would hit me too. I ran from him. I hit him hard when he knocked me down. I deserve to be hit for hitting him but I’m scared. I ran from Dr. Pierce. She was mad at me. I’m sorry I ran. I know I deserve to be punished. Please don’t spank me.”
His story is rushed as he weeps. All eyes are on me as I hold him close. I gently guide him so he’s laying on my shoulder, keeping my hand on his head as I gently sway.
“Jeremy Brayden.” I sing to him gently, simply waiting for his body to relax in my hold. “While there will be consequences for doing wrong, what they will be I can only judge once I hear Harley’s side. You won’t be spanked, Jeremy. Try to relax with me.”
I continue saying his first and middle name in a sing-song type of voice, watching the questioning eyes that now watch my every move.
“Why are you doing that?” Alpha Hansel asks the first question.
“Which part of what I’m doing is confusing?” I respond, trying to get some clarity.
“You keep repeating his first and middle name. At least that’s what it sounds like. Most parents only do that when their kid is in trouble.”
“I like it.” I’m surprised when Jeremy meekly responds to Hansel’s question.
“You do? Why is that?”
“He’s the only one that does it.”
“And what does it do for you?” I interject into their conversation.
“Reminds me who I’m with. You are not Redmen.”
He starts whispering the simple mantra letting me know exactly where he’s at mentally. I can see several of the wolves in the meeting cock their heads in curiosity.
“Redmen? I’ve heard the name. Most alphas won’t even except that pack for prospect runs. How did you get a pup from there?” Alpha Martin asks next.
“Jeremy is the most recent and youngest wolf that I have removed from any pack through the sanctuary program.” I speak gently as the young pup squirms.
“Jeremy Brayden.” I sing his name again as his squirming and tension increases.
“What’s wrong little buddy?”
“I’m scared. I know you said I won’t be spanked but that’s all I can think about. He hurt me. Please don’t be him. I can’t do this. I can’t calm down. I can’t breathe.”
I can hear his panic increasing, his breathing coming in short pants.
“Demetri, do you need your vest?” Patrick asks, concern in his voice.
“Yes.” I state simply as I walk towards my spot at the table.
I know everyone in the room wants an explanation but that’s going to have to wait. I can hear Patrick walking quickly behind me as I attempt to place Jeremy on the table. The first time fails as he collapses his legs from under him.
“You will stand.” I command in a stronger tone than I’ve been using with him so far, removing his shoes before trying again.
“Please don’t. You said you wouldn’t. Alpha please.”
He’s crying hard as I place him on the table again. I hold him up as he tries again to collapse.