Saturday, October 19th Pt. 8
“Take these to the lab for packaging. Testing for HSD is specialized and requires us to send it to the University. It’s early enough that we can prepare it and have it ready for this afternoon’s pickup.”
“Yes ma’am” Sadie takes the bin and leaves the room.
“Evelyn.” Deven speaks next.
“Yes sir.”
“Even though he has lost feeling below his knee he’s having an exaggerated pain response above it. It’s difficult to predict how he’s going to react to the medication. Ordinarily, these medications are painful for him so I need you to take your time giving them.” Deven explains gently.
“Cole, are you still awake?”
He gently pets the back of his head as I look down at him. His eyes are closed and for the first time in an hour he appears peaceful. I shake my head.
“I think he finally found his peace.” I state quietly.
“The pain he had in his back has been slowly dissipating so I’m going to slowly take my hand from him.” Deven explains as he starts standing up straighter.
“I’m going to step out and speak to Cass. We need to bring the bed in here before we can move him.”
I nod in agreement as he steps away. I close my eyes and lean against his head. He whimpers quietly as I rub his arm.
“I’m sorry. I thought for sure you had found some sleep.”
“It hurts worse now.” He keeps his response simple.
“I know you didn’t mean to but somehow you channeled with me. You shared your dream; your nightmare.”
“I’m sorry.” He barely whispers.
“Don’t be. As hard as it was to see; to experience. It’s something that I needed to know about. I will help you.”
“How can you help without me remembering what happened? It’s just a dream.”
“Rest for now Cole.”
“I can’t.”
“Why?” I ask gently.
“It hurts. I’m afraid. Neither are acceptable.”
“Of course they are acceptable. Why wouldn’t they be?” I can feel his panic starting again.
“Not when you’re him.” His body trembles with his statement, one that is as confusing as it is frightening.
“I need you to slow down, Cole. I need your help with this. Who do you think I am?”
“The man in my dreams.” He states quickly.
“I’m going to need you to walk me through that one but first it’s important that you follow my directions exactly.”
I can feel him tensing his body as he fights the effects of the drugs he was just given.
“My one arm is wrapped diagonally across your chest. I need you to grab my arm with both hands. Hug it tightly.”
He grabs my arm with his other hand almost instantly before changing the position of the one on my wrist. Despite his seemingly confident statement indicating my worst fear, his desperation shows his desire for it to be false.
“Well done Cole. Now. Walk me through who you think I am. Please Cole. I would never hurt you.”
“Are you my father?”
I’m stunned by his question but, considering what I experienced this morning, it actually makes for a sensible starting point.
“No, I’m not your father. Your father’s name is Charles Redmen and your mother is Sara Mae.”
I give him factual information that can be easily verified by anyone.
“Who are you again?” He asks after a short pause.
“I am Demetri Black.” I continue calmly.
“If Redmen is my dad then why did the nightmares start after you were mentioned?”
“I don’t know. Can you tell me what happened?”
“When I woke up, I was confused. I didn’t understand anything. The doctor introduced my brother by his real name but only his first, Andre. He told me a name but I still don’t remember what it was supposed to be just that it ended up as Colton Allen Zander. He mentioned you briefly that first time I woke but it’s also very foggy. At one point Andre was arguing that I should be told more but the doctor said not to share it. That I needed to be returned to Alpha Demetri Black. The nightmares started shortly after.”
“Will you tell me what’s happening in the nightmares?”
I encourage even though I already understand the incorrect association.
“The first one started while I was in the hospital. I was chained with my arms above my head. I had no vision, just hearing and feeling. I was being beaten while two male voices were cursing and degrading me.”
“Is that what made you leave the hospital? You thought I was the one harming you?”
I ask as Deven and Cassius silently reenter the room. I can feel him nod slowly against me.
“The second one started once I started sleeping on the street. Again I can hear and feel what’s going on but it’s more difficult to believe that it’s a memory.”
“Can you tell me about that one?”
“A little boy is nude, chained to a desk or table so he can’t run. He’s being beaten similar to how I was beaten in the first dream. At one point the man tells the boy that it’s time he meets the buckle end before hitting him with it. It’s what made me go after Braysen just after getting back to the pack house from University. He threatened Clayton with the same punishment.”
“Thank you. I know that was hard. As hard as it may be to trust me, I am not the one hurting you in your nightmares. The first time I met you was January of last year a few days before your twenty-third birthday. As hard as it is, it is important for you to recognize that your nightmares and flashbacks are memories. Don’t be afraid to talk about them. Deven, Cassius, Bridgett and I, we all want to help you. Healing from complex post traumatic stress disorder is a long term team effort and it’s talking about them as they come that will give me the best ability to help you.”
“We need to start working towards moving him. The blanket has been plugged in long enough to provide the comforting heat he desires and deserves. I also received word that Jessa is finally resting nicely after another round of intense vomiting. She is responding very well to my female doctor, Karla Austin. Dr. Austin splits her time between the medical wing and University Hospital so if a transfer is needed Jessa already knows who she’s working with.” Deven explains.
“No, I don’t want the wing. Why am I so afraid of everything?” He whimpers as he hugs my arm closer. “Alpha please. You know what’s happened to me.”
“No Cole. I don’t.” I state sadly.
“Don’t lie to me, alpha.” His statement is quiet but powerful. “You know more about me than you’re willing to tell.”
“Yes sir.” I whisper shamefully.
“I’m sorry alpha. I don’t…. I shouldn’t….”
“No Cole. There’s no shame in calling what you see. I’m the one that should be sorry. You are right. I haven’t been completely honest.” I start my explanation as I gently pet his head.
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