Tuesday, December 31st
(Andre’s POV)
Despite everything that has happened this year I finally find myself taking a moment to just let go. Alpha Julius has taken the time to set up one rocking New Year’s Eve celebration inside the pack house. He explained it’s something he throws every year as a continuation of what his parents did for his birthday.
Every year every pack member thirteen years old and older are allowed to attend. He clears out the entire ground floor for dancing and hires a DJ to play all the latest hits. A giant buffet is set up in the dining area for everyone to enjoy. It’s obvious that this pack is very respectable and close knit.
I firmly believe that I would be faring much better if I didn’t have to repeatedly report back to Red Fang but that’s to be expected as the coronated heir to the pack. In order to maintain my claim I have to be an active participant in their investigation into the disappearance of my brother and the multitude of atrocities that have been committed by Charles Redmen.
I still can’t believe that they released Kris from custody. Mom deserves to be free, I agree with that, but Kristoph. He’s worse than the man I was raised to believe was my father. No matter. It’s been nearly two months and my third holiday without stepping foot on that land and I’m making the best of it.
I grab Kiara’s hand as she steps down the last three heading from the second floor. She is absolutely stunning. Her lightly bronzed skin compliments the tightly fitted, red sequined top with two spaghetti straps hung over her shoulders. Honestly the top fits so nicely that the straps really serve no function but the site of her has my desire for after midnight that much sweeter.
Alpha Julius has lowered the thermostat to account for the number of people who will be in the house resulting in Kiara donning a simple white sweater that doesn’t close. I look down her body slowly, taking in the long, flowing red skirt that stops only a foot from the floor. I smile with a soft laugh before bringing her into my arms.
“Where are your shoes?” I whisper in her ear while I can’t help my laugh.
“Dad said to forget about shoes. If you look at everyone’s feet most are not wearing them.”
I turn to face the crowd and sure enough, only those not participating in dancing are wearing shoes. I move to the side wall in front of the stairs and slip mine off as well. Dress shoes have never been a favorite of mine. Despite the mismatch of my much more casual Oxford shirt and simple slacks makes with Kiara, she smilies as she takes my hand and we head to the floor.
While the DJ isn’t playing a particular song at the moment the mix of his chosen beat and tunes catch us nicely and in no time we’re grooving just like the rest of them. Each new song is slightly slower until he hits the more intimate slow dance to which the youngest ones in attendance manage to find their way to the buffet.
I draw my mate close with my arms on her hips while hers rest on my shoulders. I duck my head down near her ear so I can easily whisper.
“Have I told you how much I love you?”
She hums gently as I back far enough away to look her in the eyes. The connection is immediately lost to be replaced with a sweet sensual kiss that leaves me hanging for more. It’s in the heat of our passion that Alpha Julius can be heard.
“Cut the music, get the lights on. Clear a path. Andre Redmen.” He calls out, loudly bringing a lot of attention to Kiara and I.
“I’m sorry sir. I didn’t mean to disrespect. We just got into the moment, that's all.”
I try to explain quickly over what I thought for certain was a PG level make out with my mate. I’m panting hard as I start to lose control, deeply lost on what the trigger is as my panic attacks have been occurring less often.
“Andre my son, breathe.”
I can feel Alpha Julius place his hands on both sides of my head, half on my neck and half in my hair.
“Alpha Andre, look at me.”
It’s a struggle to comply but I finally make eye contact with him.
“I’m sorry for the suddenness but we need to leave.”
“Why? What did I do? You’ve never felt the need for physical….”
“No son.” He cuts me off. “I wanted to do this privately but I can feel your resistance in coming with me. Do you have children, Andre?”
My struggle to comprehend what’s going on hits an uncontrollable high as the one thing I have never spoken about gets asked. I roll my head in an effort to get his hands off me but it only results in one hand being placed fully on the back of my neck. I know I’m making a scene as I tense. I can’t contain my whimpers as I struggle to contain my yelp. Alpha Julius is barely taller than me and weighs the same yet I find I cannot escape his hold. I’m hopelessly lost as I continue to struggle without being able to go anywhere.
“Dr. Stewart, Kiara, head to my office. I’m sorry Andre.” I can barely hear him through my panic. He curls his hand gently around my neck. His voice is quiet yet firm with a note of concern. “Alpha Andre Jackson Redmen. You will come with me to my office.”
I completely freeze in place, whining sharply as I pant. I can tell every eye is on me. I know I’m in trouble for something that cannot be changed.
“Alpha please.” I whine. “Hasn’t my father punished me enough for having them out of union?”
“I need you to listen to me closely Andre. You are not in trouble but your reaction has created a great amount of concern. You will join me in my office.” I whine sharply as I finally move my feet. I can hear the whispers behind me as we move through the crowd.
“That’s enough.” He chastises quietly.
The crowd gathers back together as we pass and the DJ waits until we clear the room before starting the music again. It takes about a minute for us to make it to his office. It only took that long because I tried twice to run from him.
“Josh, you know what I need.” He speaks softly as we enter the room.
I’m halfway into the room when I hear the door swing shut and the lock latch. Even though I’ve been relatively calm the last few months, the reminder of my kids has set a bomb and the locking of the door just lit it.
“No. I’m not accepting punishment for something I can’t change.” I cry as I attempt to get past Julius to the door.
My panic has blinded me completely and it’s moments later that I black out. When I come back around I find myself pinned to the wall with my head lying on Julius’s shoulder. It takes several minutes before I attempt to lift my head. I’m lost on how something so simple could disturb me so deeply. Cole has suffered ten times over what I’ve ever received and yet I’m completely terrified that I’m about to be punished by the alpha who has never harmed me.
“Andre, I’m so sorry to have triggered you so deeply. While time is of the essence it’s important that you have a capable mind. I need you to talk to me. What punishment did you receive for having kids outside of a mate’s union?”
I close my eyes as my body shakes. I can see myself back at Red Fang, back in my father’s office.
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