Chapter 194
Rachel
I woke up 2 hrs later feeling much better than when Frank left, thinking maybe we can make dinner together, so I went looking for Massimo. I found him in his office “Hi sweetheart, did you have a nice nap?” “I’m feeling better thank you Massimo.” I walked over to him and gave him a quick kiss. “I thought we could make dinner together.” “We can, maybe I’ll teach you how to make pasta.” “You can make your own pasta?” “I grew up in a restaurant Bella and I’m Italian of course I know how to make pasta.” “I’ve always wanted to learn.” “Then I’ll teach you. I just need to make a last few calls.” “No problem Massimo, I need to do something in my office.” “I’ll come and get you when I’m done.” He gave me a kiss and I walked to my office. I checked my e-mails and made sure there wasn’t something that needed my immediate attention as I was away for a while. Most of the problems were taken care of by Enzo. I should remember to thank him. Then I started to look for a therapist that dealt with sexual trauma. I found one a few blocks away from us and made an appointment, she had a cancelation and could fit me in two days. I made the appointment and realised it was done and now I had to go through with it. I finished up in my office and went to the kitchen, getting the ingredients ready for our pasta lesson. I even found a pasta maker. He really did make his own pasta, I thought. Massimo came into the kitchen and grabbed me from behind, I got such a fright “No leave me alone!” I screamed “Fuck, Bella, Bella it’s me” I statured to hyperventilate and cry. Massimo walked in front of me so that I’ll be able to see him. “Bella look at me.” But I didn’t lift my head “Bella please look at me.” I lifted my head and looked him in the eyes, with tears streaming down my face still hyperventilating. “Bella breath please breath” I tried to but only sobs came out. He kept on saying breath, until I started to breath “Good Bella, good” When I got my breathing under control “I’m sorry Massimo” “God no Bella I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have grabbed you from behind, I didn’t think. I’m so sorry.” “It’s okay Massimo. I’ll get over it I promise.” “Bella please no rush. I understand.” “I know you do, but I also need you to touch me Massimo, I need you to take the memory of Anton away, but I don’t know how to let you.” “Ah Bella” He pulled me into a hug, I let him. I spoke into his chest. “I made an appointment at a therapist; I’m going to try it again.” Obviously, he knew I didn’t want to look at him when I spoke about the therapist. He strokes my hair, “I’m happy you going to try it Bella, I know you did this with your ex-husband before but the circumstances are different know, I’m sure you’ll get more out of the session than before.” “I hope so.” Then I pulled away “Okay show me how to make this pasta.” I tried to change the subject, he let me. “Okay let’s start. We’ll make an easy recipe. We need all-purpose flour, salt, 1 egg and water.” I gave Massimo the ingredients and put the rest of the ingredients back in the cupboard. “Come Bella you going to do it. Come stand here I’ll stand next to you.” “Okay” “Combine 1 cup of flour with ½ teaspoon of salt. Make a well in the centre and add 1 beaten egg. Mix well until a stiff dough forms.” “Like this?” I asked him. He touched the mixture “Just like that now add 2 tablespoons of water it’s a bit stiff.” I added the 2 tablespoons, while Massimo threw a bit of flour on the surface, “Okay put the mixture on this surface and knead the dough until it’s smooth.” I started to knead the dough and Massimo was setting up the pasta machine. “You doing good Bella, let me see.” He started to knead the dough a little more. “Okay know we can feed the dough through the machine.” He took the dough and started to roll it through the pasta machine “We put it through the machine until it’s the thickness we want. You keep on doing that I’ll get the drying racks.” Massimo got the drying racks while I kept on rolling the dough through the machine. When everything was set up, Massimo came to me. “Okay Bella let’s cut the pasta now.” Massimo put another setting on the pasta machine and started to cut the pasta. When he was done, he hanged the pasta on the drying rack. “That was easier than I thought Massimo.” “I chose the easiest recipe Bella, the one Mamma Rossa thought me to make when I was still a boy. I cherished those memories.” “I can only think, I hope Mamma Rossa will teach our children how to make pasta as well.” “God Bella, she’ll love that, teaching her grandchildren will be such a thrill to her.” “That makes me very happy Massimo.” “Should I make us some ground beef sauce to go with the pasta?” “Yes please, I’ll clean-up” I told him. An hour later we sat at the dining room table eating our homemade pasta and bolognese sauce. “This is delicious Massimo.” “I must agree you did a very good job with the pasta Bella” “It was a team effort.” “Fine if you don’t want to take the credit Bella, I will.” I had to laugh at that. “I’m happy to see that smile on your face Bella.” “You put it there.” “What do you want to do tomorrow, Bella?” “I really want to go for a run, I really think it will help with my mood and overall health.” “We can go but rather a jog than our normal run sweetheart, just until we know everything is okay.” “That’s also good I just need to get out and do something physical.” “Then that is what we’ll do tomorrow morning unfortunately I need to go to work tomorrow after our run.” “That’s not a problem love, you can’t babysit me forever.” “But I want to be with you 24/7 it’s obviously just not possible.” “When I come back to work, we’ll see each other more.” “That’s something we need to talk about Bella.” “What my work?” “Yes Bella” I immediately got angry because I had an idea where this conversation was going.
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