What are you doing here?
Entering my hometown always feels like stepping into a memory. As the plane announced our arrival and began its descent, a rush of emotions swirled within me. This was the place of my childhood, where I fell in love, only to have my heart shattered. Yet, it was also the place where I discovered an unexpected love, a kind of self-acceptance love I found in a hotel.
As I stepped off the plane, I knew my mum wouldn’t be far away. She must have been waiting in the arrivals hall or in her car. I had texted her as soon as we took off for the three-hour flight, and the moment I retrieved my bag, I dialed her number.
“Hi Mum, I’ve arrived,” I said, feeling the excitement bubble inside me.
“Better!” she exclaimed. Her first word surprised me.
“What does that mean?” I asked, curiosity piqued.
“Better in the sense that your tone of voice is different from when you left a few weeks ago.”
“What does that mean, Mum?”
“It means you must have achieved what you went there for,” she said, laughter spilling through the phone.
“Please stop! Where are you?” I laughed, imagining her mischievous grin.
“I should be asking you that. I’m already at the airport waiting for you,” she replied.
“That’s my sweet mum. I love you a million times.” I blew kisses into the phone.
My mum had always been my closest friend. People often mistook her for my sister because she had me at a young age. Our resemblance was undeniable, and my pregnancy experience had deterred her from getting married again.
I pulled my luggage behind me, my eyes scanning the crowd for her. All I wanted was to embrace her. Our bond was so strong that I longed to see her.
“Mum!” I yelled, waving my hand frantically. As soon as our eyes met, we quickened our steps, moving towards each other as if the world around us had slowed down.
“Wow…” we embraced, and my mum pulled back to take a good look at me. She knew my wardrobe better than anyone.
“He bought this for you? You didn’t have this kind of gown before,” she asked, a teasing note in her voice.
All I could do was hug her again, trying to brush off the question.
“You haven’t answered me,” she pressed.
“Mum… No, it was Daisy’s dad who bought it for me. He took Daisy and me to the boutique and told us to pick whatever we liked,” I explained.
“Hmm… that’s so lovely of him,” she replied. Then, I noticed a man standing behind her. It was my mum’s boyfriend, Ben. For reasons I couldn’t quite explain, I didn’t like him, and my discomfort must have been evident.
“Hi Sadie, welcome back. How was the trip?” he asked, holding my mum’s hand affectionately.
I didn’t respond. Instead, my expression turned cold. One reason for my dislike was his desire to step into a fatherly role, which kept my mum from seriously considering my biological dad’s whereabouts. They had been dating for as long as I could remember.
To please my mum, rather than out of genuine appreciation, he took my luggage from me. If it weren’t for my mum’s insistence, I wouldn’t have let him.
“Mr. Ben has been the one supporting your education. He deserves some respect,” she had told me years ago.
True, he had done well, but my longing for my real dad remained unquenched. I believed that Ben's presence was hindering my mum from seeking my father, especially given the circumstances of my conception. She had never fully forgiven him.
As we walked to the car, my excitement began to fade. I should have asked my mum to come alone. In silence, we climbed into the backseat.
“I didn’t hear you clearly. You said you’ll be going back very soon?” my mum asked as the car began to move. It wasn’t her car; we were in Ben’s.
“Next week, either Monday or Tuesday. Justin, Daisy’s father, is celebrating his new house on Saturday, and I need to be there.”
“Why did you come if you’re going back so soon?” she pressed, and I felt my stomach twist. I hadn’t expected her to say that in Ben’s presence. I wanted to avoid discussing my private life around him. Besides, my reason for returning home was something I couldn’t share, not even with her.
“I… I…” My lips pressed together, but she quickly assumed I didn’t want to talk in front of him. She placed her hand on my lap, and I took a deep breath. When she tapped me, I understood her signal to stay quiet. It was up to me to decide what to reveal later.
What would I say to her when we were alone? I needed to formulate a reasonable explanation. Just then, halfway home, Ben spoke up, “Ella,” my mother’s name, and I sighed. He hadn’t changed.
“Yes, darling,” my mum replied, glancing at him in the rearview mirror.
“Have you told Sadie about the job opportunity I found for her?” he asked.
“Oh, oh! Thanks for reminding me,” my mum said, turning her gaze toward me.
“My boyfriend has found you a job in his family’s company,” she announced proudly.
“A job? Mum, can we talk about something else?” I replied, irritation creeping into my voice.
“You should appreciate his effort first. You don’t need to be rude all the time,” she chided gently, and I leaned closer to her, whispering, “Where is my real dad? This man is making you forget about him. What he did can be forgiven.”
“Please, let’s go home peacefully. Is that why you came?” she asked.
“No,” I said, and the car fell silent again, closer to home.
As I was about to pick up my luggage, Ben interrupted me.
“You must be stressed. Go inside; I’ll take care of that for you.”
Reluctant to leave my bag in his care, my mum held my hand, pulling me toward the house, ensuring we entered first.
“Why can’t you give Ben a chance, just once? He loves you so much, and if you open up to him, you’ll see the goodness in him. By the way, why did he come and then leave so soon? Ben hasn’t come inside, and now you can talk,” she urged.
“Please, let’s go to my room first,” I suggested, hoping to buy myself time. I had less than thirty seconds to figure out what to tell her before we reached my room.
“Actually, Mum, I came for a job interview, but I didn’t want to say it in front of Ben. Unfortunately, I received a last-minute message that the interview has been postponed. So, I’ll be staying for a while and then going back because of Justin’s house party.” Just as footsteps approached, I froze. It was Ben.
“Your luggage. Can I come inside?” he asked.
Before I could respond, my mum said, “You can come in.”
Ben entered, dropped my luggage, and then stepped back out. As he lingered at the door, he asked, “Sweetheart, will tomorrow still be possible?”
“What’s happening?” I inquired, and my mum hesitated.
“I don’t think I’ll go anymore. My daughter is here,” she replied, and I noticed how it affected Ben’s movements as he gently closed the door.
“Mom, what is it?” I pressed.
“Sadie, don’t worry. I don’t want anything to come between you and me.”
“Please, tell me. I care about your happiness and relationship too.”
“I know, please tell me,” I insisted. When my mum saw my determination, she relented.
“Ben has been invited to his family gathering tomorrow evening. He wants me to go with him to avoid gossip, and I promised before you told me you were coming.”
Hearing that made me think of my newfound love and how I wanted to introduce him to my mum as my source of joy. I needed to support my mum. Hopefully, when the time came to reveal my older boyfriend, she would accept my choice.
“If that’s the case, I want you to be with him. I’ve come to realize that happiness and love are unique to everyone.”
“Are you sure about what you just said? Minutes ago, on our way home, you showed some hatred towards Ben. Why the sudden change?” she asked.
“Mum, my breakup with Leo has taught me a lot about life and love.” I embraced her and added, “You can go and make your man happy.”
As she turned to leave, I asked, “What time are you leaving tomorrow?”
“4 PM, and I doubt if I’ll come back the same day. Won’t you be bored?”
“Your happiness should come first. Don’t worry about me. I’ll explore the city and maybe visit old friends.” Just then, we heard a knock on the front door.
“Let me check the door, so you can have some privacy with your boyfriend,” I said. I walked to the door, dread pooling in my stomach.
“I’m coming,” I called when the person knocked again. Upon opening the door, the last person I wanted to see stood there.
“Leo? What are you doing here?”