Shitty
Stepping into the shower under the spray of lukewarm water, I welcomed the uncomfortable feeling that cascaded over me as his scent was covered. I leaned my head forward and the shower head doused me and I prayed it would take away this feeling in my chest. I didn’t want to think about him, didn’t want to wonder about him, didn’t want to put a name to the feeling. The harder I tried not to, the louder the word got. Need. Need. Need. Now that I’d met my mate my mind was turning on me. I grabbed the loofah and lathered it before scrubbing my body hard. Determined to clean every inch of my body, in denial of the fact that no matter how hard I scrubbed, I wouldn’t be able to erase his face from my mind.
My skin burned as I worked, my hair clung to my face, neck and body as the water heated. I’d never wanted to find my mate before, never wanted to see him. I even worked at a human club in hopes of avoiding my kind and avoid the possibility of coming across him by accident. Now that I looked back on when I first walked into the room, I hated how my heart raced as I scented him and how I’d been hopeful for only a few minutes. Had he known it was me the whole time or had he not cared? What the hell crawled up his ass and died? The loofah dropped to the floor as I pushed my face into the stream of water and opened my eyes. Nothing in life comes easy, or without pain but for once, I had hoped, for once I wanted it to be easy. Anger fills me as I remember the way he’d dismissed me, degraded me, and tried to put me in my place after I spoke to Maximus. My heart shuttered as my mind raced to figure out why he was so displeased with me as if there was something I could do to make it better. I refused to be the weak woman who begged for his attention, instead, I would focus on the anger I felt, the hate I should have for Shane.
The easiest way for me to dry my hair is to use the blow dryer, but it’s so damn early I don’t want to wake up Gabe. My morning is his night and he needs sleep just as much as I do. I wrap my hair in a towel and throw it up above my head. I try not to use hot water after my first shift because it makes me want to call in to my next shift. I’ve been booked out for the rest of the year so I don’t need to work there anymore. I sigh. But that would just be lazy of me. What happens after the money runs out? I shake my head. Definitely not. I’ll keep working and store the money away after I see how much my cut is. I left so quickly after Shane dismissed me that I didn’t talk to anyone. I didn’t see Donny or talk to Char.
“Note to self: Don’t be a shitty friend and call Donny,” I murmured to myself.
After my skin treatment, I went for a natural look with my makeup and pulled my hair up in a bun. It was still damp so this was the only way I could keep it up out of my face and appear professional. There are bite marks on my shoulder, neck, and breasts. The mark on my neck needed to be covered with makeup but the rest will be hidden underneath clothing. Opening the door, I headed over to my closet and pulled out a black crew neck sweater and dark blue skinny jeans. My closet went from homeless grunge, to bad ass stripper, to professional cute barista. Checking the time, I had an hour until my shift at Big Foot.
The bed in the other room creaked and I hoped he was just tossing in bed. Leaving my room, I walked towards the kitchen, side stepping crushed fruit and juice on the floor. I lifted the lid of the pot and turned on the stove to medium and pre-heated the oven. Chicken soup for the soul. There was nothing like a warm chunk of bread with a warm bowl of soup. Covering the pot, I started gathering up the trash and threw it away before I put away what was on the counter. Stirring the pot when I could, I grabbed the loaf of bread and started slicing it as the oven beeped. The door swung open as I threw the slices into the oven. Gabe came walking out in shorts and a very large t-shirt that couldn’t be his.
“Morning, Ady,” Gabe yawned.
“Go back to bed! You don’t need to be up right now,” I scolded. He walked over to me and pulled me in for a big bear hug. My throat tightened and I fought the emotion away, refusing to let myself cry. I hadn’t cried since I’d gotten home and I wasn’t going to cry now. I attempted a smile as he pulled away. His hands came up and gripped my cheeks as his eyes scanned my face, locking on my red eyes.
“What happened?” Gabe asked carefully.
“Nothing, I’m just really tired,” I laughed as I attempted to brush him off. Turning from him, I flipped the switch, and lifted the lid as the soup boiled. “You had him over again, huh? Make sure to thank him for the soup. There will be enough for you guys to have some for breakfast.”
“Ady,” Gabe said cautiously.
“Yes,” I said with fake cheerfulness.
“What’s goi—”
He was cut off as the door opened and the two of us turned to find Leo standing in the doorway. My best friend was speechless and so was I as our eyes locked on a very naked, very hard Leo.
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