Pieces
Adea
Not even twenty-four hours since I’d slept with Chance had passed, but why did it feel like it had been a while? I sighed as we headed toward the bakery I was meeting Mavy at. Never mind. I know why. Every minute I spent with Shane felt like a gift—bad or good. When he was in front of me, he had my full attention. All I saw was him. Nothing else mattered. I felt a tinge of guilt being on Chance’s arm. Not because I was most likely hurting him, but because I felt like I was cheating on Shane.
How sick is that?
What made this situation worse was knowing Chance was aware of what I’d done. I knew he could scent Shane on me, knew he could smell his cum and how it mixed with his own. I should feel like a shitty person, but I don’t. I never promised him more than his sessions.
Last night wasn’t part of the plan, but Chance wasn’t ever supposed to be. I never swore my loyalty to him and I’m not the one who serves him. It’s the other way around. It’s twisted, but I feel comforted by Chance’s presence. If he’s hurt, he doesn’t show it and that only makes it easier for me. I liked that he knew I’d slept with Shane and didn’t try to guilt me about it.
I had my cake, and I wanted to choose when I ate it.
“You never told me what brought you to this part of town. Are you following me?” I asked.
“I did tell you. I told you I was hanging around. Where are we headed?” he asked.
“I am on the way to meet a friend,” I corrected teasingly.
“May I walk you?” he asked.
“You’re doing that right now,” I joked.
“I am, but I’d like to know that it’s what you want,” he said.
“You may walk me, kind sir,” I said.
My lip twitched as I tried not to smile. He reached out and grabbed my bag of books. I opened my mouth to tell him to be gentle, but he beat me to it.
“I hold precious cargo. I’ll be careful with them. Don’t worry,” he smiled. For a second there, I forgot about the book conversations we’ve had. Although he didn’t read the same genre, we would check in with each other about our current reads. He preferred mysteries and thrillers, while I enjoyed fiction and smut. Lots of smut.
“It’s been a long time since we’ve had a book convo,” I said.
“Have you read anything noteworthy?” Chance whispered. As if we were sharing secrets.
“I’ve been so busy. My latest read is an omegaverse,” I whispered back.
“Mm.. there’s a lot of smut in those,” he teased.
“There is,” I said.
“Did I not give you enough last night?” he gasped. My step faltered, and I inhaled sharply.
“Chance—”
“I’m kidding, Luna,” he said, cutting me off. He wasn’t. I knew he wasn’t. He was attempting to assure me. But I couldn’t help but wonder if this was his way of showing me he wasn’t happy about last night.
“Why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you so we don’t have to play these games?” I asked. He stopped walking and un-looped our arms. Grabbing my hand, he brought it to his lips and stared into my eyes.
“I promise you. When it comes to you, I’m not playing any games,” Chance murmured. I took a deep breath and let it go. Released it until I could mentally envision it making its way down my body to the tips of my toes.
“You’re upset,” I said. He put my hand on his arm and we were walking again.
“Of course. What man wouldn’t be?” he asked.
“I’m not yours,” I reminded him softly.
“But I want you to be. My feelings are my own. I’m not pushing them on you. Nor do I want you to do anything you don’t want. I’m feeling jealous, but I think I’m doing a good job of keeping a lid on it. Don’t you?” Chance asked.
“You’re jealous?” I asked.
“Before we separated last night, I was under the impression that I’d made you come multiple times. You’d finally given yourself to me and I left a very happy man. Now, I see you the next day, and you smell as if someone coated you with their cum multiple times and let it dry. So yes, My Queen, I’m jealous. I’m jealous knowing someone else was inside of you after me. I’m jealous knowing someone else marked your skin and is telling me to stay the fuck away from you. I’m angry because someone’s challenging me and there’s nothing I can do but stay by your side until you reject me. It makes me angry. It makes me want to hide you from the world. I want to lock you up and throw away the key. I know it’s not about what I want, but Goddess, I want you. I don’t want to share you,” he said.
“Chance…” I trailed off.
“I know. I know… It’s hard for me to stay quiet. You asked, and I answered. I wasn’t trying to stress you out. I just wanted to share how I was feeling. Thanks for listening, Luna,” he murmured.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
That’s all I can say.
I can’t offer him something I know I can’t give.
“Don’t say what you don’t mean,” he said.
“I am sorry. Not for what I did, but for making you feel this way. You’ve been nothing short of amazing,” I said truthfully.
“I am pretty amazing,” he joked as we rounded a corner.
“It’s selfish of me, but I like seeing you go all alpha-male on me,” I teased.
“I bet, but I understand,” he laughed.
“What do you understand?” I asked.
“I understand that I’m not who you are looking at right now,” he said.
“Chance—”
“Let me finish. I’m okay with that because I’ll be here in the end. I’ll always be here for you and one day, when he breaks your heart, I’ll be there to pick up the pieces,” he said.
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