Willingly
Shane’s ability to tear me down while still making me feel seen was too much. My chin trembled as he gave me the confirmation I craved. His hands slid up my thighs, and I spread them, giving him easy access. His fingers dipped beneath my skirt and he growled as they found a thin triangle covering my pussy. His claws shredded through the fabric and lightly grazed my skin. I didn’t need to look at him to know he was angry, but the part of me that was angry needed it as much as his affection. Peering back at him, I lifted my chin and stared into the eye of the storm. Lust and possessiveness glared back at me.
“You wore this on a date with your friend,” he spat the last word. My vision blurred.
“You killed him. There’s no need to worry about him anymore.” My voice cracked as the words filled the space between us.
Unaffected by my tears, Shane leaned down. His other hand wrapped around my throat as if he had done it a million times. I could feel his warm breath on my face, a strong wall of muscle at my back, and his cock twitched angrily—still trapped in his slacks. I was aware of Odis driving, but it was too late to feel shame.
“Wrong. What was only a fling to you that’s easily forgotten is not the same for me. It will haunt me for the rest of this life, the next, and every one that will follow after. I’ll remember that in this life, you gave him what was rightfully mine. You’ve given a piece of yourself that was always reserved for me,” he hissed.
“Sha—” His words died in my throat as his grip tightened painfully.
“Sh, sh, sh. I’m talking.”
I nodded my head.
“If I’d known, I would have dragged it out. He died too quickly. I should have made him suffer. What were your intentions wearing this? Oh, Adea. I should have taken you in front of him. Would you have liked that? He would have known who you belonged to and you would have the reminder you’re in constant need of. Something you’re in constant need of. I would have enjoyed watching the way his pathetic little heart broke as he realized you liked it as much as I did. Or better yet, watching the light dim from his eyes as I filled your holes, all of them on that goddess-damned beach.”
The tears stopped flowing as his words painted a picture. He meant every fucking word. Did I hate him more for it? Yes. Was I also turned on by how possessive he was? Also yes. I didn’t deserve Donny. I always knew it. Not his friendship and definitely not his love. There would be no redemption for me. No saving me now that I’d crossed over to the dark side. I was sitting on the devil’s lap and I had no intentions of trying to break free.
I was damned.
Truly lost.
He may have forced me to say I’d obey and be loyal, but no one made me want those words. No one made my heart beat a little faster when I knew I would go home with him. I didn’t have to fight him anymore, and the only poor excuse that had made it all happen was sparing Chance. That was on me and me alone. We were made for each other. Shane’s fingers slid between my pussy lips and I bucked my hips forward, whimpering as he spread me apart.
If Shane was my damnation, I’d walk into hell willingly.
“You stand for a man who robbed me of spearing your virgin blood on my cock, something that has always and will always be mine, while you’re wet at the thought of me claiming your holes in front of him?” Shane spat the words cruelly.
Moisture escaped again, this time because of the hate in his tone. Tears leaked from my eyes and I moaned as his thumb rubbed my clit mercilessly. Closing them, I ground my hips against him and pushed into his chest. Needing him to plunge more than one finger inside of me. I needed him to finger fuck me and make me forget that he’d killed my friend.
I wanted to forget that I loved the monster at my back.
“Say it,” he hissed.
His fingers stilled, and I groaned.
“Yes, Shane. I’m turned on. I want you.”
“No, no, no. You’re not getting away with it that easily. Say the words I want to hear,” he growled. Still, his fingers didn’t move, but I ground against him shamelessly.
“I want you to fuck me. I’m turned on at the thought of you fucking me in front of Donny.”
It felt as if he’d forced the words from my mouth, but that was another lie. He didn’t make me say it. I’d spoken the truth, and that alone was like a knife to the gut. His finger slipped out of me, only to be replaced with three.
“Oh, fuck,” I cried. Throwing my head back, the grip on my throat held me still, so I stared up into his obsidian eyes that flickered to a possessive glow. It hurt, but it always did with Shane. There was never any time to adjust to Shane—why would sex be any different? He finger fucked me like he wanted to imprint the feel of his fingers inside of me, so I would never forget him. I widened my legs until they hung off both of his thighs.
“Such a good girl, but for how long? When will you crack? When will my mate come out to play?” he growled.
Mate.
That one word had my heart thumping wildly in my chest.
I hated him.
Goddess.
I loved him.
I opened my mouth, but couldn’t get a word out as his thumb violently dug into my clit.
“What was that? I can’t hear you,” he mocked.
“W-when I don’t have to fear you… killing those I love,” I rasped. His fingers curled inside of me. His fingers delved into my pussy, and I clenched around him.
“The only time you won’t have to worry about me killing your ‘loved ones’ is when they’re dead,” he murmured in my hair.
I reached out, holding onto his arm. He dived into me, touched me just where I needed him, and I shuddered as his fingers curled.
“Are you getting ready to cum around my fingers?” he taunted. His thrusts rough and hard, the squelching sounds of my pussy sucking him greedily, only had me tipping over the edge as he sped up.
“Shane,” I moaned.
“Already?” he mocked.
“Yes, I’m…” I trailed off.
His thumb on my clit disappeared, and the hand around my throat dropped. Lowering my chin, I watched as his fingers worked my pussy expertly. The glisten of my arousal stroked the flames of my oncoming orgasm. His fingers pinched my clit and didn’t let go as his other hand continued thrusting into me hard enough to make my body move backward. Lifting my chin, I stared into those obsidian eyes that haunted my dreams.
“There’s my girl,” he praised.
His only words of kindness this night washed over me, kissing my skin, and I tumbled off that edge into sweet oblivion as I held onto his gaze like it would anchor me.
“Look at you. So beautiful when you cum. Squeezing my fingers like the dirty fucking whore you are. No, Shane. Stop it, I love him,” he spat. Tears welled in my eyes as my body twitched around him, on him, under him. I was a dripping mess as my body convulsed. “I know you better than anyone else in this Goddess-forsaken world. I know what you taste like, what you fuck like, and what your pussy looks like when it’s being spread open on my cock.”
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