Chapter 187
Kyrah's POV
A couple of weeks later, I finally get discharged from the hospital. Such a relief because I really have a strong disliking for hospitals. My arm is getting better and some of my bruises can barely be noticed. My memory is quite clear now, although I just feel weightless.
I haven't been talking that much, even when my friends and family came to visit. The sad news I received about Scott really hit me hard. Harder than a wrecking ball hitting a wall.
The numbness is back.
I hate it. So fucking much! I hate this feeling of being unable to feel or want anything. It's funny how much I wanted to feel numb when Blake broke my heart but right now, I don't want to feel this numbness that has taken over my body and soul. All I want to feel is Scott's arms around me.
It hurts, so bad. I feel like my heart is enclosed in an icebox and the blood being pumped through my veins is getting colder everyday. Even without being told, I know that I look pale. My skin is whiter than usual and my face is expressionless.
I miss him. So badly.
It's been really difficult for me not to see his face. It tore me apart that day when Roxy broke the news. I wanted to run away from the hospital but I couldn't. His face keeps haunting me all the time when I go to sleep. I dream of that beautiful day we spent with each other, over and over again. And during the day, I replay the memories of that particular day from morning till evening. Sometimes it's like I'm in a trance. I can't hear and see anyone or anything when I am thinking of that day. The day that I last saw him.
They say you that you never know what you've got until it's gone, that you never miss the water till your well runs low.
His absence is killing me day by day.
Without him here made me realize how much I loved him. No, how much I LOVE HIM. To me, he'll never be in my past. I love him. But I realized that I love him more than just a friend. I just didn't know it.
His presence has always made me react in a certain way that I always thought was strange and that I was going crazy, but no. I wasn't crazy. I've been staring at my true love all along without even knowing. I didn't love Blake, that was just pure lust, stupidity and blindness combined.
I was too blind to notice that I was being toyed around with. Too blind to notice that Scott wanted me. And now, I feel awful about it.
How I wish I could have told him I love him. How I wish I could have gotten the chance to say goodbye. Or maybe all the sweet things he did for me on that day was his way of saying goodbye... One thing I know, is that I will never understand how this life works.
Roxy and Kye have tried contacting Scott's dad to no avail. Whenever they call, they get notified his number is out of service. Kye even emailed him... nothing. He had to physically come to the hospital to tell me the news. My heart broke into tiny pieces.
***
As dad pulls over at our front yard, I sigh heavily when I see our house and then my eyes swiftly move to his house. Scott's house.
Mom helps me out of the car and walks me to the house where I find all my friends except the Judas that betrayed me, Tyler. He can as well go fuck himself for all I care. Everyone is happy that I am finally home. I am happy to be home, I am happy that my friends are here but not all of them. Scott is not here and he will never be here.
"Welcome home, babe," Roxy says as she pulls me into a hug. "We just wanted to celebrate your recovery for a few hours maybe?" she smiles and I nod.
"Sure. I'm getting better thanks to all of you guys and your positive messages," I say, "I will never stop thanking you all."
"Have a seat and I'll get you something to eat," Wren tells me. "Mrs. Bailey, could you give me a hand in the kitchen for a little bit?" she asks mom who nods and follows her to the kitchen.
Time passes by swiftly, everyone is trying their best to cheer me up, I appreciate it and I am trying my best to show that they are trying but, I just can't stop thinking about Scott and it makes me even sadder.
Hours later in the afternoon, after everyone has left, except Roxy, I take my pills just as the doctor prescribed and I sit quietly on the couch. Dad just left for work, mom is cleaning up and Roxy is helping her. My eyes are on the television but my mind isn't.
I ascend from the couch, Snow follows me to the door but I tell him not to follow me. I walk across the green lawn and my eyes scan Scott's house from the top to the bottom. When I set my feet on the front porch, memories flood my mind. How we used to sit on the porch and laugh, how he looked at me with longing all over his blue eyes.
I close my eyes and release a shaky sigh as I recall the very first time I saw him.
***FLASHBACK***
"Mom! I'm taking out the trash, be right back," I say as I shut the door behind me. When I walk down the two stairs on the front porch, my eyes widen when I spot a tall, masculine and very handsome man walking to the back of his car. He's in a black v-neck, black jeans and a black pair of heavy boots.
I guess he's my new neighbor.
There's a huge white truck behind his car and there are a couple of people helping him move his stuff into the house.
He still has the out of state tags. I observe him carefully as he takes out his suitcases and turns towards the house.
I'm still holding the trash bag and I put it down then he notices me and he turns. When his eyes meet mine, I panic. Those are the bluest eyes I have ever seen in my entire life!
Then, he smiles and I feel like I just got hit by a wave of shock. His teeth are white and perfectly arranged in his mouth. He puts his suitcases down and nods at me. I wonder what his name is. I scan his face all the way down to his torso, his t-shirt is clinging on to his body like second skin and his muscles... damn! He's handsome. Very attractive.
"Hey," he coos and something inside me flips. He licks his lips and his smile grows wider.
"Hi," I say shyly. "Guess you're my new neighbor. Nice to meet you, I'm Kyrah Bailey," I say as I stretch my hand to shake his, and he takes my hand in his and shakes it.
Wow! That's a really firm handshake. His hands are also soft. He looks like a really nice guy.
"Scott. Scott Stone. Pleasure to meet you," he says in a husky voice and grins at me and I grin back at him. Butterflies are wrecking havoc in my stomach and I can feel color creeping up my cheeks when I look at his gunmetal blue eyes again.
***END OF FLASHBACK***
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