Chapter 120
Sharene covered herself quickly with the sheet as I leaned down and picked my shirt up off the floor and put it on needing to have clothes on to keep me from being distracted. Though I knew I would be distracted either way. Sharene looked at me as she sat sideways as I put my back up against the headboard and folded my arms over one another. "I guess you are right we should talk more….I'm the one who wants this to be more than just hook ups. As for my daughter's father.... he died last year in Iraq and that is a sore subject for me, so I'd rather skip ahead... I'm from Australia as you already know... I now live in Florida with my baby girl who stays with her grandparents when I'm away. They are my dead husband's parents... my family is still in Australia but visit from time to time. I just turned 21 on June 1st and my baby girl is going to be 9 weeks on Monday. It's been really hard actually since her father is gone and I've pretty much been in this depression mode until..... the day I met you actually. Then all these feelings started up again... I've been with a few other girls but only sexually never in a romantic capacity. It would be new for us both if you go the right direction. I just need you to know that when it comes to my life, I'm super private as I've said before. With that if we do try this I still won't want you to meet Madeline until I'm ready. I can't promise this will last either, but I know how I'm feeling and I'm falling hard. Especially with more time I spend with you and your family….there that's what I've got right now and I'm sure that isn't what you were really expecting to hear..."
Sharene had definitely left me speechless for a good minute "Hmm nope not at all which I get it if I were a mother, I'd feel the same way... I'm sorry about your husband.... I'm doing my best to just process it all. I've got a lot of pressure on me and this just adds more and I guess I need to know what happens if I move to Europe? Do you seriously want to have that long of a distance relationship? When do we see one another with you working and having a baby and me going off to college to find myself more or less.... I'm not sure how you can fall so hard when all you've seen is crazy shit happen so far. I'm just still trying to come to grips with my reality as it happens. I don't want to hurt you and I am afraid that with the distance that will be between us and the labels you want for us or whatever you'd like to call it a relationship... I'm a very sexual person who actually needs it at times to make me feel human and normal. Part of it is bad because that's a reason it was so hard to leave my ex-boyfriend. Even after he beat the living shit out of me any time he was under pressure or angry about something. As you already know I had twin girls and they'd be about 4 months now and have a lot to do when I get back home with them. My parents are hell bent on me doing something I’m not sure I'm ready to do...." "Yes, I'm aware of the situation your mother and I have become real close in the last few days... I could not imagine what you must be going through or what you have gone through. I have never seen things like that and I've had a pretty umm sheltered life, I guess you could say. As for the distance and ummm all that I can do it if you just give me the chance to prove it to you that is...." she said with tears filling up in her eyes.
We both fell silent just watching one another with me moving from the bed to my feet and trying to figure out what I wanted to say next. Leaving me fighting on how I felt as I was feeling something for her too but didn't want to end up hurting her or her hurting me. "Honey... you can't ever foresee those things, not even us.... you sometimes just have to go all in and if it doesn't work out...." "I know it'll just make me that much stronger, and it'll be a learning experience..." I said to myself knowing the speech all too well. I had made my way to the window as the shades were slightly open and just focused on the city lights. That seemed to help calm me down as I realized that there was no guarantee to any of it. Sharene was at my back pressing up against me and wrapping her arms around my front lightly. Raising her hand to my heart feeling and probably now hearing it through my back. Only after she rested the side of her face on it.
Sharene took one big deep breath before talking in a soft tone that did so many things to my body. "I'm sorry..... I guess we should have done this weeks ago... of course I was scared then to even admit to myself that I had let my guard down so easily with you. I have never done that, even with my husband who I met when he was on vacation with his parents 4 years ago in Aussy. He was having one last hurrah before heading off to the military and we fell hard for one another with him proposing only after a month knowing me. I said yes to him because I was 17 and.... I'm not proud to say but had been with a few guys before him and actually was dating a guy my parents loved. They also had high hopes of us getting married and yet I threw it away after just a month of being with him. I had been to the states before for competitions for dance and well we married before he left. I moved to Florida where he was from and loved it with my parents tagging along to get me settled into our little apartment. I had already finished high school at 17 so was looking for something in dance. I got accepted into a few schools and even Julliard which was amazing. I'd failed the year before to get in with my routine. I loved and still love dance, choreographing, working out, competitions for dance... anyways that's me and now I'm back in school for a little business, nutrition and health. Right now I have a full plate too, but willing to try this between us" she whispered as she ran her hands up under my shirt causing me to flex which she seemed to like.
When I knew she was planning on other things I gripped Sharene's roaming hands as they were at my waist ready to go down below. "NO... seriously that's one thing I'm not comfortable with when I'm cycling... sorry...." I said turning in her arms and facing her. She smiled and in one swift move had my shirt off and, on the floor, as she was already naked from before and dropped the sheet mins before. I decided that talking was over for the time being and wrapped my arms around her lifting her just enough so that we were eye to eye "Ok...." I whispered before kissing her and she wrapped her legs and arms around me moaning into my mouth. I turned us around and put her back against the cool window and we were both so warm to the touch that the coolness of the window did nothing to cool us down. It didn't matter since we'd both be sweating in minutes and her rolling into orgasm one after another. The sounds she made and the way she said my name was enough to make me orgasm without needing any type of penetration or 4 play in return. "That----that was fucking incredible.... wow... I can't believe this is happening.... no take backs...." Sharene gasped as she slowly moved from where I had placed her on the bed and collapsed next to her a few feet away.
I put my arm behind my head and looked up at the dark ceiling with the shades now wide open with the city lights lightly illuminating the room. "Yes..... that was different from even the last time and to be honest different from all the other times I've had sex with anyone. I'm not going to take back what I said as we're both on the same page..." "Trial run...." she whispered as she put her head on my chest cutting me off.
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