Chapter 88

Savannah was all about getting to know the newest people in the group and struck on Asher first. "So Asher.... you are from IveyRose ya? I have only been there once when my bro first bought this place and there was like nothing here. Your grandparents were just getting started themselves but of course had a house, and even a couple things going. How is it over there now?" she asked. Asher finished his bite and answered her questions "Actually the tour thing was Mia's idea and my grandparents thought about it and now that I’m done with high school and taking a year off before going to college. I decided to come help get it up and running and well that was 6 months ago" he was full of such pride. I laughed thinking about all the times I had been to IveyRose and how Christian and Joellene would talk about their grandson and how perfect he would be for me.
Everyone had looked at me as though I was crazy for laughing as hard as I was. "Damn girl it wasn't even a funny conversation...." Nicholas said as he grabbed me water when I started to choke from laughing so hard. "N—O s--o—r-r—y I was in my own head just thinking about something stupid. Anyways…. back to Asher sorry for interrupting Savannah. Who is going to grill him until he is confessing to things he probably never did... lol should have been a lawyer that's for sure" I muttered as I started to calm down a little more. Savannah growled at me but smiled and agreed that I was right. "I better stop now then because if I'm not careful I'll end up getting into trouble, plus I really should return some of these work calls that need my attention. Mia we'll finish our discussion later back at the guest house, tell the family I'll see them a little later and try and keep them on a leash... ha-ha didn't come all this way to not get a little time alone... plus it's your fault grand-mom and pop are here so you're up girlfriend" she said just before kissing my cheek and heading out the back door.
Bruce was on his way in from the living area and saw Savannah heading out "Oh that is just like her to make a disappearing act as soon as she can find a way... oh well I don't blame her one bit... could only imagine what it's like when you are the only girl, but how is it being the only child all together" he joked grabbing my shoulders and squeezing. He took Savannah's seat and looked all serious for a minute before turning to my friends and making comments. "Cate looking more beautiful every time I see you.. Nick, Jose..... well what to say about you both... you look good together and good luck out there be safe and remember to come home to one another... as for you Asher, which one of these girls are you giving it too?" he asked with no shame at all. I was wide eyed staring at my uncle and apologizing for his outbursts. "Damn Bruce.... Asher is not going to just tell you, but if you are concerned it is me at all well don't... so the rest is his business... anyways being the only kid is a whole other hell then being the only girl or boy in the family... and even worse when you are the only grandchild on one side and the oldest on the other... too much, expectations for sure..." I said cleaning up my mess along with Savannah's who had took her chance to leave.
Seeing a chance, I took a risk asking Bruce what was happening with the adults in the other room and was not surprised when I got the look of "you don't want to know", "Ya figured no need to say more... did you hear anything about shit I didn't tell you and Sav?" I asked needing to know if my father was telling my mother anything. "Nah, but that Jasmine chick is heavy for sure as she's asking my parents stuff and then asking your parents stuff.... she is just wow... not bad looking either" Bruce said making us all laugh. I was starting to get a little nervous the more the time ticked by. Dinner had yet to be served to the rest of the people in the house and could not handle the weirdness between my friends anymore.
My head was hurting with all the energy, and I just snapped. "OMG ok I get it you 3 are pissed off at me and are trying to figure out why I won't explain the things I kept from you. The thing is why burden you 3 with shit that happened, and you warned me about if I went back to him and did every time even though I told you I didn't. I don't blame anyone but myself for being too weak to leave even though I thought I could change him. Make him into a man like his father one that would be exactly who I needed. That was the mistake though I threw it in his face every day telling him to be a real man and grow the fuck up. To act like he had sense and was raised better than how he was treating me. I made excuses for him even to my damn self and then when I found out he was juicing and still I stayed. Even when he got violent, and now I'm slowing letting him and the past go. I don't want to hang onto the guilt and anger anymore and just finish moving on and living a healthy and positive life as much as possible. That's it I'm sorry that you were blindsided about things and that will be the last time I apologize. We all either move on from this point on or when you 3 leave in a week or so we go our separate ways and live with our decisions that we have made or make" I said before leaving the kitchen and taking the fresh new potpie that was ready to be served.
There was not a close mouth as I left them all stunned and mouths gaping including Bruce who was on his feet following me to the other room. I sat the casserole dish in the center of the table and called everyone to the dining room needing to clear the air with the rest of the house before I lost my mind. I waited until they all sat after being shocked that I was yelling including Greta who took a seat. Though she usually waited to eat until everyone else was sitting down. Bruce sat wanting a front row seat which just irritated me but also kept me from freaking to much along with my brother Ethan who had come from wherever he was. He put up a shield around me and him knowing the next step was going to be hard. Everyone sat and stared waiting for me to explain the outburst. I took a few extra seconds to just take a few deep breaths before letting it all out. "I'm only going to say this once and then once I leave this room I don't want to hear another word about it or be pinned against the wall making me feel like I have no control of my life... I'm sorry that I kept things from you and didn't come to you for help when I know you would have done anything and everything to do just that. I've said it before I need time to let it all out and eventually, I will be ready to let it all out. To explain my reasons for keeping everyone in the dark. It was nothing that anyone did to keep me from telling you it was me and the love I had for Maxwell. In time and space, it has helped me see things clearly and let things go and forgive, but I will never forget so that pain and those scars will permanently be there. To be honest that is what keeps me alive most days when I'm feeling blue, scared, nervous, anxious, or just like I'm spinning out of control. So, I just ask that you bear with me and understand that I'm going through things just as much as all of you. Even though you've only had days to come to grips with things that I kept from you. Grandmother, Grandfather I'm sorry that my father felt he had to call you both here and the rest of the family. To handle something, he could have just easily asked me, because I'm not dumb and know everything about my own medical history. I know you were afraid that I'd keep more from you and you are probably right. It's just that my privacy and we all deserve the right to have that don't we? I'm sure there are things I don't know about every single one of you and you know what I'm fine with that.... anyways thank you for listening and not interrupting even though I can see you all want to say something. I promise you'll all have time to ask questions especially mother who is pieced into things bit by bit. Father and I would never want to overload your plate with more than you can handle at one time. I'm sure this won't be the last time you are upset with me or even disappointed but just try and let up on me a little and let me figure things out ok…” I begged taking a breath before I got the last lit bit out.

In the life of Mia Series: The beginning
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