Chapter 75
My mother Amelia didn’t find the whole 3 some funny at all “Damn it that’s not a joke that…. That can make things even more complicated for the 3 of you so watch it. I am going to go see how the young men are feeling this morning you two enjoy the rest of your breakfast. The stylists will be here a little later with Joellene who will be arriving before Asher and Chris” she said before leaving us. Catherine was on me the moment she walked out closing the door behind her. “Damn babe that was seriously not funny to her or myself, and that shit is private to me, so I’d like to keep it to just us ok. I mean I don’t mind talking about sex, but I don’t add myself to those conversations unless it’s just us and the guys. That was super uncomfortable for me so please watch it next time you open up and talk about our sexual encounters” she scolded me before kissing me.
Catherine finally pulled back when she was out of breath and now leaving me wanting more. I would not let her move when she tried to get up and she stayed pulling her food over to feed herself and fed me at the same time giving me a bite to her 2-3 bites. I was fine with it since I was not that hungry for food. “Wow…. Well that’s a first” Catherine said as she looked down at my plate. “I actually got you to eat it all, maybe I should do this all day because we both know you don’t eat enough and burn right through all the calories that you do intake” she muttered. Nicholas and Jose found us still on the balcony, but we had moved from the table to the loungers and stayed connected. All while Catherine laid between my legs as we took the down time to just relax. “Well look at the two of you….” “Wow so I take it that was the two of you this morning bumping ugly’s” Nicholas slapped Jose’s ass as he sat with him in his lap. We all knew who it was they heard. I was never the quiet type, and either was Catherine even though I overpowered by a lot.
Jose quickly changed the subject “So, who’s better…. Cate or Sharene?” he asked wanting to know and before I knew it, I had all eyes on me waiting for the answer. I knew at that moment I had to lie my ass off because Sharene was the one I pictured every time ever since I had her. “I would have to say Cate since I only slept with Sharene once and Cate knows me so there” I said kissing her shoulder. Jose looked like he did not believe me for a moment, but I kept up my look and even challenged him back. Finally, after a few more seconds Jose backed off and relaxed into Nicholas’s arms where he fit so perfectly as they both did in one another’s arms. Catherine watched the two men as they got comfortable and made a sound that told me she wanted what they had. I would have lied if I could but it hurt my heart more than she would ever know. I tilted her head back so she was looking at me “I’m sorry….. so sorry that I can’t give you what they have” I whispered softly into her mouth as I kissed her softly.
Catherine clinched her fists into my shirt pulling me tight and as close to her as she could. She buried her face so that she could cry not wanting me to see her in that state of weakness. I felt like all I was doing was hurting the people around me including myself when I knew that I could stop at any time. I knew I was being selfish needing what I needed and not taking their feelings into consideration. Nicholas and Jose were off in their own little world as they sat with us for only about a ½ hour before showering and going up to the house to see everyone. Catherine pushed herself up and away from me and I didn’t stop her this time knowing she needed her space too. I watched her walk away all the way to the bedroom door leaving me without looking back. My bedroom door stayed open as I watched and waited to see if anyone would come running in but after a few minutes of nothing I turned back and closed my eyes. “Yep you did that….. that right there is your fault….” Ethan said with such disappointment in his voice.
There was nothing I needed to say and closed my eyes just wanting a little solitude where I knew I could find it in my dream state. With my children that I never got to have because of their father. “Would I be different if they were here, would I be different if I never would have let Max hurt me all those times” I thought as I drifted into a state of dreaming that told me I wouldn’t be happy. Maxwell was there I was there it was one of the nights after we had, had a fight with his father who just wanted him to succeed without having to struggle like he had.
Maxwell and I had argued about the littlest things the last year of his high-school year we had together which I had broken up with him ½ way through due to his abusiveness. I did not understand why I was reliving all the bad moments and none of the good moments we had. I knew there was always a reasoning behind it. Another hurdle to overcome to truly heal and be happy and open my heart to the possibilities of finding true love. All so I would not be alone for the rest of my life. I was pulled forward into a future situation that showed me just how we’d end up if we had stayed together or if I took him back. It was worse than all the other times I took him back before fully letting him go. “You are nothing but a whore….. it’s your fault I hurt you… it’s your fault we can’t have children and we have lost already 4 pregnancies.. you are nothing useless and should be put out of your misery…” Maxwell’s voice choked me, clouded my thoughts making me feel exactly how he saw me. “Nooo…. It’s your fault I’m like this… you made me weak…. I’m nothing because of you…” I was pounding at his chest feeling every bit of it as I took out my anger.
Log in with Google Account
Chapters
Favorite
Settings
