Book 2: In the Life of Mia: College Chapter 46
Leona had stayed quiet as my mother and I talked and in between our little rooms and completely amazed by it all. "Ladies I really need to get back to the house and do work, but you are welcome to stay here as long as you want now that you are now verified by blood and are part of this place just as much as I am" she smiled hoping that we would explore more. We all left together since I did not want to be there not really knowing what happens there and was not about to find out or be trapped. Leona left in her own car while my mother and I left with Bailey and Lola along with her team traveling behind us and making it back to my place by 2:30pm with my father in panic mode from the moment we walked in the door. "Damn it, all communication was lost, and you had me freaking out along with poor Sharene who is actually lying down with Maddie for a nap before we head out... I'm glad you decided to come back home and..." I cut him off by wrapping my arms around his neck and sobbing "I--I I'm sorry..... I just.... I can't have you all here causing me this stress and with me snapping I really can't have her or Maddie here. I am sure you realize what I'm saying and I am not asking you to make excuses for me or help me in that way because it's my choice to do this with her by my side or not and... right now I just can't... I am trying to do this damned balancing act and its fucking hard doing it alone even though mother is doing her best. Leona has helped in a way that Sharene just can't right now... which has nothing to do with sex or anything in the line intimacy at all just she knows what I'm going through and who knows maybe together we can help each other. Mother will fill in the blanks when she can instead of all this speaking in code type shit here and now...." he squeezed me so tight I had to stop talking even though my voice was just above a whisper with everything that had happened in just a weeks’ time.
My father pulled back and stared at me eye to eye "Go talk with Sharene and get in some time with Maddie because I don't want you regretting not saying what you want to say god forbid something happens and...look mother and I are going to head to the air strip now and you can either come with to drop her and Maddie off or just send Paxton and Lexi to bring her" he was now wanting me to figure the rest out leaving it all up to me to figure out what I’d way to Sharene. I watched as my parents drove off after hugging and kissing them and I was doing my best not to fall apart since now I had to go into the bedroom and talk with Sharene who was napping with Madeline and it was tearing me apart as I got closer to the door. I knocked even though I didn't need to "Sharene..... are you up?" I whispered walking into the room. Sharene was sitting up in the bed holding Maddie and breastfeeding. "I'm up... just feeding Maddie before I head back with your parents... I'm at a loss for words right now and don't know where we go from here to be honest with you. I love you and you love me but keep pushing me away for whatever reason... I know there are things you don't like sharing which I understand since there are things I don’t like to share, and you give me that. You snapping earlier though didn't set well with me and you just seemed to do it out of nowhere, I am a mother and my child's safety comes first and foremost as you would agree I'm sure. I hope you figure out what you want someday but I can't be waiting putting, my life on hold either" she was so calm as she spoke, but refused to even look at me.
She was intense without words spoken and her thoughts and emotions had me staying close to the door in-case she freaked out with me being in the room with the door open or even closed as she was looking so broken all because of me. "I--I am truly sorry that you are worried about Maddie's safety and I'm sorry for snapping earlier and yes there are things I have not told you because it's so damn new for me and it's a little hard for me to even believe at times... I know that love won't always conquer over other things, but I also know that I don't regret telling you because it healed my broken heart and it's what I needed. I guess I was right from the beginning though and we should have both just listened.... I will be out here when you are ready to go.. and Sharene I'm sorry" I left the room not being able to control my voice any longer and letting the tears flow. Sharene didn't stop me but I was hearing the voices in her head and I was pretty sure it was over between us as I left her there and busied myself in the kitchen and feeling my heart breaking. "Paxton, Lexi if you could pull the SUV around and take her and Maddie to the strip that would be greatly appreciated. Also call the company that sent the items here for Maddie and have them taken back and I will pay her the money back now for wasting it" I was now giving orders as I didn't want any of the baby items just hanging around tormenting me.
Lola looked as though she might cry and headed off into the bedroom to see if Sharene needed any help with getting ready to leave. Bailey was stone faced since he was a man of few words and didn't not let his emotions get caught up in it all. "I appreciate the stone face look, no arguing with me about anything and I really, really appreciate everything you do for me on a daily basis. I'm sorry if I don't tell you that enough sir, but you are one in a million and I thank Gio for sending me the right guy for the job. Let me ask you though, do you think this is an unsafe place for me now? Not meaning school but where I live? My father thinks I should look for a new place and I'm sure he's made a few comments in the last day or so to you and I know I am young and should not have to be worried about these things, but I also trust my father and you so if you tell me it wouldn't be a bad idea than I need you...." "Ma'am... it wouldn't hurt to look, and maybe even take Leona up on her offer.. she has the space that's for sure and she knows exactly what you are going through. I am fond of you as well and I did not realize myself until this assignment how much a 19 year old girl could be going through and what a difference she makes in not just close friends and family but complete strangers lives" Baileys tone was that of not sympathy but empathy and even I was still in shock I think a little of what was actually happening.
Sharene carried Madeline out in her car seat with Lola carrying the diaper bag and rolling the suitcase along next to her side and she stopped in front of the living room couch and looked down at Madeline and then at me. "Do you want to say bye to her or...." "Yes only if you are ok with that I do not want you to think I was always this nuts and should have….never mind" I couldn’t keep going and finally moved closer to them cutting her off immediately because I knew it was going to be a rough night that would turn into days possibly weeks or even months. I lifted the car seat up and placed it on the couch. "Hey princess.... I love you... don't ever forget that ok... you are too little to understand all this crazy stuff, but you know things that most people don't because of how little you are and how open minded you are. I want to thank you though for everything since you brought a lot of love and happiness, possibilities back into my life and I thank mommy too for even trying this whole thing with the 3 of us. I am not sure where we all go from here, but just know that I'll never forget either one of you. Plus, now you are part of the family the both of you" I smiled trying to keep the tears back and looking up at Sharene for a min while I was on my knees so I didn't seem so tall. I looked back down at Madeline and finally went on "So now you have my parents as grandparents too if you want them to be..." I stood up and looked at Sharene wanting to hug and kiss her, but she had other plans and picked Madeline up and carried her out the front door without another word.
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