Chapter 51
Looking at my mate as we walk out of the room all I can think about is how broken he looked at his first mate's death and then the hurt I saw when he chased me down after I rejected him I never want to see that look again. My heart was still broken from watching what I had. Thinking back at what I saw I noticed I had not at the time. Stopping short my hand jerking his. He looks back raises his brow at me. “Luna Wendy wasn’t your mother or your father's second chance he choose her?” phrasing in a question but knowing deep down the answer. Shock is all over his face. “how did you know that I don’t remember telling you about Wendy?” I can see the confusion all over his face. “it's what I saw in my dream.” again shock is all over his face. “that's not what I saw. I saw something I am sure you don’t want to be shared.” my heart speeds up trying or figure out what he saw. If I saw all those times in his life what did he see about mine?
Fear is closing in around me. The air is to think I can't breathe. Letting go of his hand and brought my hands to my neck. Clawing at it trying to get air in my lungs as they burn. Black spots dance on the edge of my vision. I can't think. My knees threatening to buckle. Warm hands wrap around my waist pulling me his hard body. He starts rubbing his hands up and down my back making shhhing noises next to my ear. “do you want to talk about what I saw now to get it out of the way.” he asks me I nod. He looks back at John “we will be down in a bit okay. Can you have some cream dought brought up and some milk? He nods and leaves closing the door behind him.
Pulling me to his lap as he sits down. I ready myself for what he has to say. “what I saw was when your brother sold your virginity to the red-eyed wolf and his friend. I wish I knew who this man is so I can take him out for hurting you.” his hands going to my cheeks his thumbs wiping away the tears that fall from my eyes. My heart sinks knowing he saw that. I wish I could forget about that but I do have a scar at the base of my neck to remind me of what happened. The man said this was so I would always remember who I belonged to. dropping my gaze as far as he will let me I feel nothing but the same I had felt all those years ago. “look at me” he pleads “never think I think anything less of you. Do you know how strong and brave you have to be to live through that?” shaking my head. “you have to be the strongest wolf I know little one. I don’t know if I could make it through just a little of what you have. I don’t think I was shown what I was to look down on you but to help understand why you thought rejecting me was the best option. Not that you can reject me now.” he nuzzles his nose in my neck peppering me with small kisses.
“you mean it for real you don’t blame me or look at me differently because of my past?” I know it's stupid but hope was bubbling in my chest as to what his answer will be. “if I had been forced to do something would you hold it against me?” no fair answering with a question. I pout looking at him shaking my head. “so why would I blame you for something you had no control of?” thinking about his question I shrug my shoulders I can't think of a reason. He smiled at me bringing my lips to his for a soft sweet kiss. One that sears me to the center of my soul. I can't stop the light moan as his lips touch mine sending sparks over them. His hands slide from my cheeks to my neck his fingers tangle in my hair. Feeling him smile against my lips I can't keep the smile from my own lips. Breaking the kiss looking into his eyes tears already filling them as I remember him losing his first mate.
“what has brought the tears little one?” my heart swelling more. “I saw you training mostly except when you lost your first mate.” a flash of pain and sadness cross his eyes. His hands sliding down my arms to my waist. Wrapping his arms around me hugging me to him he nods against my chest. My fingers having a mind of their own start running through his hair my nails lightly scratch against his scalp. A purring comes from him. Enjoying to moment with him but of course, it couldn’t last as the knocking on the door started. Growling at being interrupted he starts laughing. “it's your dought” at that I jump from his lap running to the door. These things are almost as addictive as his kisses. I can hear him laughing the whole time. Throwing open the door to the last person I wanted to see at the door. Seeing me she shoves the bag and glass of milk at me hate written all over her face. She sniffs and growls setting me on edge. My wolf is no longer willing to be a door mate. We are the Luna now. Taking a breath squaring my shoulders I let my wolf bleed into my eyes turning them so black no light can be found in them. A small hint of fear slips off her before she composes herself. Grabbing my stuff from her turning and kicking the door shut in her face. “train me” I demand dropping the bag on the bed. Tilting his head I can almost hear his question of why “she is going to challenge me and right now I will lose. I don’t want to lose you.” I could care less about anything else she can have it all but she can't have him he is mine. The goddess made me watch him grow up thinking about his pack above him and then watching him break when he lost her I will not let anyone take me from him without a fight. Looking me in the eyes I hope he sees my determination to keep him. A bright smile spreads over his face before he pulls me to him slamming his lips to mine. “anything you want my love”
