Chapter 13 Climbing the Mountain
That night, I couldn't sleep, just lying there with my heart aching. I clenched my teeth, trying to fight it off.
Around dawn, Daniel texted me, "Do you really have a boyfriend? How come I've never seen him?"
I stared at the screen until my eyes hurt. I thought, 'Daniel, you're not part of my future anymore, so why do you care?'
I put my phone on silent and tossed it aside without replying.
The next morning, with dark circles under my eyes, I planned a hike with some old friends. After yesterday, I really didn't want to see Daniel. But since our families lived so close, bumping into him was inevitable. To avoid him, I decided to go hiking.
I used to love hiking and swimming, being very athletic. But after things ended with Daniel, I changed. I no longer liked intense sports or noisy crowds; I just wanted peace and quiet.
I preferred finding a quiet spot to read or daydream over group hikes. But to avoid certain people and situations, I had no choice but to go hiking. When I finished getting ready and opened the door, I saw Daniel and Zoe about to leave.
"Daniel, Zoe, hey." What bad luck, running into them again! I greeted them, not wanting to chat much.
"Perfect timing, let's go. I called a car downstairs."
I was stunned. "You guys are going too?"
"Of course, you think we'd let you go alone?" Daniel looked at me sideways, teasing.
I was speechless. 'Why are you guys joining the hike? Can't you let me have some peace? What should I do? Should I just stay at home? But I organized this. If I bail, my high school friends will blame me. I wanted to avoid them by going outdoors, but now I've brought them right to me. I really did this on myself.'
Little did I know this hike would further strain my relationship with Daniel.
Daniel was slowly wearing down my affection for him. At that time, I thought, 'maybe it's for the best.' What I couldn't let go of, he was making me.
When all my affection was exhausted, I'd be completely free.
Our old classmates gathered at the foot of the mountain. This was our first reunion since summer break started. The friendship among the girls was bright and joyful; we hugged, laughed, and had a great time.
They all knew about my past with Daniel and often joked about our close relationship.
Even though I had seriously clarified before, to them, it was just my side of the story and not credible.
To them, Daniel and I were a perfect match.
But when Daniel held Zoe's hand in front of me, they were confused, and the gossip started.
I had nothing to say. Should I tell them it was always one-sided, that Daniel always saw me as a sister? All I could do was smile bitterly.
"Daniel, introduce your girlfriend to everyone."
Zoe leaned into Daniel's arms, smiling shyly, clearly cherished.
"Oh, when did you get a girlfriend?" Lillian, always blunt, shouted.
All my friends knew about my feelings for Daniel. They also knew about the time he publicly scolded me and had even scolded him back for days.
Lillian, in particular, always stood up for me and probably wanted to seek justice for me.
"She and I were both single, isn't dating normal?" Daniel was clearly annoyed.
"Aren't you two..." Amelia Lindgren, standing closest to Lillian, didn't want to see me embarrassed. She used her height and long arms to cover Lillian's mouth and drag her away. "Stop talking nonsense. Let's just start hiking."
Hiking was tough, especially for those who weren't used to it. By the time we reached halfway up the mountain, everyone was exhausted, sitting under the shade, panting and resting.
They all gathered around me, hesitant to speak. Their expressions, wanting to say something but afraid to hurt me, were both funny and heartwarming.
Thank goodness for them today; otherwise, in an argument, I might have been completely defeated by Daniel.
I said, "I'll say this once, and no one can ask again. The engagement back then was just something the older folks joked about. Daniel has always seen me as a sister. It was my misunderstanding, and it had nothing to do with him. Zoe is the girl he likes, and they've already met each other's parents. They're planning to be together."
"And what about you? Jane, don't tell us your feelings for him were fake."
I smiled bitterly. Eighteen years of feelings couldn't be fake. For Daniel, I almost gave up on myself.
I replied, "Any forced feelings won't end well. He is who he is, and I am who I am. If you can't stand seeing me alone, feel free to introduce me to any great guys you know."
"Jane, are you very sad?"
I turned my head to look at a blooming daisy in the distance, stayed silent for a long time, and then said, "It will all pass."
Everyone sighed, lamenting the unpredictability of life, and then enthusiastically talked about introducing me to men a hundred times better than Daniel when we got back.
I couldn't argue with them, so I let them ramble on.
Finally reaching the top of the mountain, everyone clamored to go to the only convenience store for cold drinks. I spotted Daniel and Zoe, who had somehow arrived earlier, sitting on a bench under a tree, feeding each other raspberries.
They exchanged loving glances, Daniel's arm around Zoe's shoulder, Zoe leaning into Daniel's neck. Whether he lowered his head or she raised hers, they could easily kiss.
My heart tightened instantly, more sour than the raspberries.
Not wanting to torture myself, I turned and walked in the opposite direction.
The mountain top was big enough that finding a spot where I couldn't see them was easy.
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