Chapter 521 It's Really You
I was wearing stiletto heels, and when I fell, I twisted my ankle. It hurt so much. My shoulder also got scraped badly from hitting a tree by the roadside, and blood kept seeping out.
I sat on the curb, penniless, and cried my heart out.
It really hurt, both my body and my heart.
Why did Ryan have to go? It was so far away, that it would take hours to drive there. By the time Ryan arrived, the rain would have stopped. And Grace wouldn't be waiting for you in the classroom, wouldn't Ryan understand that? It was just a matter of not having an umbrella; any classmate passing by could have given her a ride. Did Ryan really have to drive across the city for hours to bring her an umbrella?
Why does Ryan always have to leave me for Grace? I'm Ryan's girlfriend. Ryan promised to spend my birthday with me, so why didn't he keep his word?
When will Ryan choose me for once? I'm a girl too, I want my boyfriend's love and care! I want my boyfriend to choose me unwaveringly when something happens, to hold my hand and say, "Baby, I will never let you down."
I kept calling him with my broken phone, stubbornly wanting an answer from him.
At first, no one answered. Later, when I called again, his phone was turned off.
I sat alone on the sunny roadside, feeling that even the sun in the sky was cold.
Without the keys, I couldn't go home. Without my driver's license and other documents, I couldn't check into a hotel. I had no choice but to drag my injured body back to school alone.
I was so embarrassed, all the teachers and students who passed by looked at me with strange eyes, as if they were studying a monster.
Fortunately, my roommate wasn't there, so I could cry as much as I wanted.
I lay on my dorm bed, tears flowing like water. I felt like there was a big hole in my heart, with cold wind and snow blowing in, making me numb from the inside out.
I had refused my parents and insisted on spending my birthday with Ryan, but I didn't even get to eat a piece of birthday cake. I lay in bed hungry until the next morning.
That was the first time I realized that loving someone who doesn't love you back really hurts.
I cried for a long time that day. After my tears dried up, I started to think about my relationship with Ryan. Was it worth giving my all for it?
Ryan came back two days later, with a happy face, handing me a pair of pearl earrings. He hugged me and kept apologizing, prepared a new birthday cake for me, took me to the restaurant we had reserved for that day, and then to a midnight movie with a couple of seats.
Even though he tried hard to make up for it and I tried hard to forgive, there was already a rift in my heart.
I couldn't break it, and it kept us apart.
We couldn't see each other's hearts, nor could we enter each other's worlds.
At that moment, I clearly realized that Ryan and I had no future.
The atmosphere in the small room was tense and eerily quiet.
Ryan, like a dog that had been heavily hit, used all his strength to say, "I'm sorry."
He looked up, trying to force a smile, and said weakly, "Amelia, you won't forgive me, will you? You don't like me anymore, you will never like me again, right? Amelia, didn't you say that no matter what the future holds, even if the sky falls and the earth turns upside down, you would still like me? How could you change your mind halfway?"
I suddenly remembered the time I met Ryan on the street in my freshman year.
He was wearing a simple white shirt, tucked into his dress pants, with short rebellious hair and clear eyes.
At that time, I couldn't help but be moved, secretly liking him.
After he asked me to be his girlfriend, I once said with great pride, "Ryan, no matter what the future holds, even if the sky falls and the earth turns upside down, I will still like you."
At that time, I thought I was good enough, that if I loved him enough, I would eventually move him and make him love me too.
But I didn't know then that love itself is a consumable. If you don't carefully nurture it to grow, it will only diminish and eventually disappear.
No matter how deep the love, it can't escape this fate in the end.
I smiled faintly, "Yes, Ryan, I once thought I could warm your heart. But I overestimated myself and underestimated how cold your heart could be to anyone other than Grace. I naively believed that if I gave my heart, I would get yours in return. The truth is, I was too naive. Maybe our breakup isn't just because of Grace. I gave up myself to love you, but I didn't realize that love is a two-way street.
You made me realize more and more clearly that your heart never belonged to me, whether Grace was around or not. I should apologize for our breakup too. I was too foolish to think that my love was the whole world for you, but in reality, it only made you struggle in a dilemma. My love trapped you, Ryan. I'm sorry, but it's not too late to let you go now."
"No, Amelia, I didn't dislike you. You are you, you are different from her," Ryan said anxiously.
"Amelia, I didn't sleep with Grace. After I met you, I never slept with her, really."
I coldly interrupted him, "Whether you slept with her or not, you hesitated between choosing me and her. It's not just physical betrayal that counts as infidelity; emotional betrayal is even worse."
Whether they slept together or not was impossible to verify and unnecessary to verify.
But he was right. He and Grace grew up together, had deep feelings, and she was destined to hold an irreplaceable place in his life.
People are just like that, they don't cherish what they have; they only long for what they can't get.
Grace returned to her hometown after college. Wasn't it natural for him to take care of her, someone he loved since childhood? As a man, wasn't it natural for him to take care of Grace in every way?
All the "shouldn'ts" were on me.
I shouldn't have misunderstood him, shouldn't have denied his requests, shouldn't have initiated the breakup, shouldn't have...
"No, Amelia, I know now. The one I like is you, it really is you."
I laughed mockingly, "Ryan, what do you like about me? Do you like how I treat you without limits? Or do you like how I take care of you meticulously every day? Do you like the project plans I wrote for you, or do you like how I obey your every word?"
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