Chapter 105 The Idea of Pulling
Bella paused for a moment, wondering if he was trying to dig up old arguments. Suddenly, she snapped, "It's you! You're the one who doesn't want to get along."
Sterling glanced at the tablet filled with dense text, feeling a headache coming on. Bella's emotional outburst only made it worse.
He turned off the tablet and looked at her seriously. "Bella, do you ever think things through? Who started this? Who ended up in the hospital? I'm not forcing you to bow to me; you're the one pushing me to bow to you, right?"
Bella went silent.
Sterling continued calmly, "Bella, I know people say I keep you tied down, that I restrict your freedom. Do you really believe that? Am I the one holding you back?"
Bella was at a loss for words. Seeing her silence, Sterling pressed on, "What kind of freedom do you want? Is it so hard being my wife? Or do you think I haven't let you work? Have you ever really listened to me? You say you want to leave, but what do you actually want to do when you leave?"
It was the first time Bella had heard Sterling say so much to her.
But she didn't respond because his words left her speechless.
Bella thought, 'What kind of freedom do I really want? Is it struggling to make a living, being so exhausted every day that there's no time to rest, or is it being Sterling's wife, having everything I need without worrying about money?'
She realized that none of these were what she truly wanted. She longed for mental freedom, to breathe freely, to cry when sad, throw tantrums, indulge in madness, work when inspired, and sleep when tired.
But she could do all these things as Sterling's wife too. This thought left her confused.
Sterling had already given her these freedoms. What more did she want? Bella couldn't help but ask herself, 'What do you really want?'
Finally, she thought about uncovering the truth about Lucas being wronged and avenging her child.
But these were things Sterling couldn't give her.
Sterling didn't hear Bella's answer. After a long silence, he said, "Bella, I'm going on a business trip for a while. Zoey will take care of you while I'm away. You'd better think about what you really want." With that, he left.
Bella sat on the bed, lost in thought.
Zoey came over with some flowers Bella liked and her favorite foods.
She placed them on the bedside table and saw Bella in a daze. "Mr. Windsor said he's going on a business trip. When you get home, you should move back to the master bedroom."
Bella nodded without saying a word.
She was uncertain about her relationship with Sterling. Sometimes she felt really depressed, like a voice in her head was urging her to distance herself from him. Being around him made her feel suffocated and overwhelmed.
But then, another voice inside her kept insisting that Sterling did care for her, just like everyone said. The problem was, she didn't feel it herself.
Did Sterling really care about her? These conflicting thoughts kept battling in Bella's mind, driving her nuts.
Bella thought she might actually be sick. The pain of losing her child still haunted her, mixed with the torment and confinement Sterling had put her through when she was younger, and the heartache from the other night.
But why, whenever Sterling showed a bit of kindness, a bit of gentleness, she couldn't bring herself to say she wanted to leave?
And the questions Sterling asked her earlier left her speechless.
After a long silence, Bella finally asked, "Zoey, did he say how long he'd be gone?"
Zoey said it wouldn't be long and then added cheerfully, "Mr. Windsor should be gone for a while. You won't have to argue with him."
Bella nodded. In the following days, Sterling indeed didn't show up; he must have really gone on a business trip.
During these days, Anna came to the hospital every day to keep her company, tell her jokes, and cheer her up. Bella's mood brightened considerably, and she became more open-minded.
Although Bella couldn't escape Sterling, she thought about how to live a happier, more carefree life. At least this way, she wouldn't be overshadowed by the past.
Bella thought, 'Even though the life I want hasn't been realized yet, I know Sterling probably won't make things difficult for me in the future.'
After a week in the hospital, Bella felt too bored and begged Zoey to arrange for her discharge. Zoey couldn't resist Bella and had to arrange it.
But on the day Bella was discharged, it suddenly started raining again. Zoey found it amusing. Ryan, who didn't go with Sterling this time, came to pick Bella up.
On the way, Zoey laughed and said, "Mrs. Windsor, it's quite a coincidence. It was raining the day you were admitted, and it's raining today when you're discharged."
Bella smiled and said, "Yeah, it really is." Thinking back to that night a week ago, she had truly thought she was going to die.
Feeling bored, Bella chatted with Ryan and asked, "Why didn't you go with Sterling this time?"
Ryan said, "This time Mr. Windsor went somewhere far and remote, so he asked me to stay." Then he continued, "Mr. Windsor asked me to stay and look after the company."
Actually, Ryan thought to himself, 'Mr. Windsor asked me to stay and take care of you, but he told me not to tell you that.'
Bella nodded at Ryan's words, feeling a bit puzzled. Since her hospitalization, the Sterling she experienced differed entirely from the Sterling others described.
Back home, Bella stayed for several days, feeling much happier. Sterling still hadn't returned.
Bella thought she was in a good mood because she didn't have to face Sterling. Zoey also breathed a sigh of relief, thinking Bella would soon recover and that her efforts to take care of Bella were worth it.
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